independent living/assisted living place versus comprehensive care place

[Anonymous]

It's also difficult to find a skilled person to care for an elderly relative. It can be hit-or-miss. You can luck out and find a true Angel, who is thoughtful, gentle, and grows to love your elderly relative. Or, someone who doesn't give a rat's ass, steals from your relative, etc. It's not high paying job, not high-skill job, so it's not like there's an abundance of good people to choose from. It's really hit-or-miss, and if you're far away, you have no way to oversee the care.

[Anonymous]

If her condition deteriorates and she needs more care, maybe she can stay where she is with a private aide? At least until another plan can be implemented?

[Anonymous]

You either hire a private duty aide to come in and help or move her there and as she declines you'll have to move her again. I would just move her closest to the family member that is going to take care of her the most as if she's far its hard to visit regularly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The places we are looking at are designated as "Independent Living + Assisted Care". She would move into a full apartment and live independently, but would have easy access to help for cleaning, taking out the garbage, cooked meals if she should want it, organized activities and transportation to places, etc. If at some point she needed more help she would move into the assisted living rooms that are just a bedroom with a small kitchenette, and have all her meals cooked and more care. But not nursing home type care.

Prior to this week, she had been living on her own in a condo and doing her own grocery chopping and cleaning and so on. She just wasn't able to keep it all up.

I would prefer to have her in a community where she could move into memory care or nursing home care if she needed it, without having to go through the process again!! But yes, she has money enough for either option.

That's what my FIL and MIL are doing and I think it's a great option. She can be independent as long as she can and they will help her transition when the time comes.

[Anonymous]

OP, at Independent Living and Assisted Living places, since they are renting, it's like their own home. If they want to hire extra help to come in, they can. They can hire a nurse to visit, it's just not arranged thru the facility. Again, it's like you would do it if you were in your own home -- but resources are known. Other residents likely have had similar needs. True "nursing care" needed long term is ... I want to say, rare. That's my experience, have had 4 parents pass.

Most of all, forgive yourself for not being able to anticipate the unknown. It wouldn't be terrible if she moves