Screen Time

Anonymous
DCs get one-hour (two 30-minute episodes) of educational type shows after dinner. And movie night on weekends. No iPads, though, unless it’s a special circumstance like a long flight.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Our 4th grade daughter is on a tear about how little screen time she gets vis-a-vis her friends, who she insists get unlimited screen time.

She is currently allowed 2 hours of unstructured screen time on weekends -- mostly she uses this for Minecraft or Nintendo but sometimes watches Netflix -- and none during school nights. She also gets additional supervised screen time, such as Friday night family movies, or sometimes we'll sit down together and look up puppy videos on Youtube after homework is done or she'll research something with supervision.

So maybe that's all told 6 hours a week, between unsupervised and supervised screen time, mostly on Friday night and weekends. We are thinking of giving her a couple more hours of free time but not during school nights.

Honest question: how much unstructured screen time do you give your older elementary school child?


Honest answer - unlimited, as long as grades are A/Bs. DS is 4th grader, he has a cell phone, chrome book and PS4. He probably is an unusual case, because he kind of monitors his own screen time, ie gets bored after an hour and goes to play something else (legos, outside, etc). Between extracurriculars and friends coming over to play, daily screen time is about 2 hours on weekdays and probably 3-4 hours on weekends. He mostly watches Youtube videos, cartoons and plays Minecraft. Occasionally he will spend a chunk of weekend playing new PS4 game.
Flame away.


No flaming from me, I think that’s great! I’m jealous you don’t have this battle. And your kid is at a massive advantage in school and work since hell be measured against overly distracted people.
Anonymous
My kids (1st adn 4th grade) get 2 hrs/day on their iPads on the weekends only and maybe an hour on Friday afternoons. So 4-5 hrs/week. Mostly minecraft.

This does not include watching TV or movie nights.

I really do believe screen time is like a drug making them want more and turning them into monsters when their time is up. I love weekends when they have lost their ipads.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Our 4th grade daughter is on a tear about how little screen time she gets vis-a-vis her friends, who she insists get unlimited screen time.

She is currently allowed 2 hours of unstructured screen time on weekends -- mostly she uses this for Minecraft or Nintendo but sometimes watches Netflix -- and none during school nights. She also gets additional supervised screen time, such as Friday night family movies, or sometimes we'll sit down together and look up puppy videos on Youtube after homework is done or she'll research something with supervision.

So maybe that's all told 6 hours a week, between unsupervised and supervised screen time, mostly on Friday night and weekends. We are thinking of giving her a couple more hours of free time but not during school nights.

Honest question: how much unstructured screen time do you give your older elementary school child?


Honest answer - unlimited, as long as grades are A/Bs. DS is 4th grader, he has a cell phone, chrome book and PS4. He probably is an unusual case, because he kind of monitors his own screen time, ie gets bored after an hour and goes to play something else (legos, outside, etc). Between extracurriculars and friends coming over to play, daily screen time is about 2 hours on weekdays and probably 3-4 hours on weekends. He mostly watches Youtube videos, cartoons and plays Minecraft. Occasionally he will spend a chunk of weekend playing new PS4 game.
Flame away.


This is so kids dependent. i have one kid who would spend all day on his ipad if we let him. He is an active kids without it, but also a kid who needs to be entertained/can't entertain himself very well. My other son is like yours; he will play on it for a bit and then move onto something else which usually involved imaginative play by himself.

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote: I don't personally know a single parent who lets their kids have literally unlimited screen time. I have heard of them but all the parents I know are constantly agonizing about what to do and re-calibrating from time to time.


It doesn't seem like unlimited screen time would work for anyone but I am weirdly afraid of asking her friends' parents directly. I'm afraid of coming off as judgmental. And honestly, it doesn't matter if her friends get unlimited time because there is no way we are going that route. It just wouldn't work for our family.


My kids are older now (high school and college). They always had unlimited screen time. It was pre-smart phones and tablets. When they were young they shared a computer in a common area. I think they each got a PC in their room when they were in 5th grade.

We had one TV, in the living room, that they were free to watch whenever they wanted. They weren't supervised, but we spent a lot if time watching together. I did exercise control to the extent that I wanted them to watch things that were age appropriate. My husband's ideas in that area were much laxer.

They both went to magnet schools where they did very well. They were both National Merit scholars.

I don't think the screen time hurt them. I think some of the PBS shows (Cyberchase, Magic School Bus, Postcards from Buster, etc.) were beneficial to them.

We did other things as a family. They did other things on their own. They had extracurriculars. Sometimes they would watch a lot of TV. Sometimes very little. Life just found it's own balance.
Anonymous
My kids are 12 and 15 and basically have unlimited screen time. We do cut off internet access between 9:30PM and 8AM, but they can still watch downloaded content or play games that don't require access during that time. As long as their grades stay up, homework is getting done, and they continue to be physically active then they can use their downtime how they want. I do keep an eye on what the younger one, in particular, is watching and I have all passwords so I can check texts/emails if I want to (but in reality I really don't unless they give me good reason for concern). Neither uses Instagram, Snapchat, TikTok or any similar social media...it's mostly texting, YouTube, Netflix and my older kid does a lot of creative writing on her laptop.
Anonymous
My kids are in second and third grade. No iPad during the week - I'm fine with them watching TV or playing video games. But...this is after homework, any practices or games, any other lessons, and Boy Scouts. So whatever they can squeeze in between 5ish (when they get off of the bus) and 8:30 (bedtime) after doing all of that and eating dinner, I'm fine with it. They have unlimited screen time on the weekends. Again, this comes after any practices or games, projects for school, hanging out with friends, etc.

I say all of that to say - don't believe the hype! Some of her friends have screen limits, she is just telling you about the ones that don't.
Anonymous
Earned time on weekdays, from doing pages in workbooks. That time may be redeemed in blocks of time for individual episodes or partial/full movies. Homework, chores and physical activity come first, scheduled activities second, workbook and earned time third. In practice, that means that it’s 0-3 hours per week.

Weekends, free access to television from waking until an adult is present. After, it’s limited due to so much going on. So, 5 hours tops over the weekend.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:My kids (1st adn 4th grade) get 2 hrs/day on their iPads on the weekends only and maybe an hour on Friday afternoons. So 4-5 hrs/week. Mostly minecraft.

This does not include watching TV or movie nights.

I really do believe screen time is like a drug making them want more and turning them into monsters when their time is up. I love weekends when they have lost their ipads.


You're the parent. If weekends are better without ipads, don't allow them. It's tough at first to quit once that genie is out of the bottle (I know from experience) but the resulting household harmony is so worth it. After a few weeks, the screen monster behavior was almost gone, and a year later, we don't miss them.
Anonymous
1st grader - we do not set a limit. DD most often watches maybe 30min of tv a night during the week (right after school, she needs the downtime). Then it's homework, playtime, scooter riding, reading, etc.

Weekends it's definitely more between some tv and games, but she'd rather be doing other things. If we have a playdate I can immediately tell those kids who don't get much screen time. If there's a TV on they are GLUED to it. They rarely want to do anything else. On the flip side those who don't have limits seem to prefer playing with other kids in general, and can easily ignore the TV.
Anonymous
I think you're right on, OP. Our elementary schooler (7) gets no screentime M-Thursday. He gets some computer time on Friday mornings (PBS Kids games, mostly for now) before the bus and about 1 hour of TV time per day on Saturday and Sunday, dependent on behavior (TV time is the first thing to go if he misbehaves).

We don't have tablets. I imagine we'll have to adjust this as he gets older, but like you, we're invested in keeping his screentime on the low end of normal.
Anonymous
None. Not unless she's home sick from school, or we're on vacation.
Anonymous
Mine get unlimited screen time (I got unlimited TV when I was a kid and eventually got a full D1 athletic scholarship, so laziness and TV/screens aren't synonymous).

That said, what you do doesn't seem unreasonable OP. Limited, yes, but NBD.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:1st grader - we do not set a limit. DD most often watches maybe 30min of tv a night during the week (right after school, she needs the downtime). Then it's homework, playtime, scooter riding, reading, etc.

Weekends it's definitely more between some tv and games, but she'd rather be doing other things. If we have a playdate I can immediately tell those kids who don't get much screen time. If there's a TV on they are GLUED to it. They rarely want to do anything else. On the flip side those who don't have limits seem to prefer playing with other kids in general, and can easily ignore the TV.


I've had the opposite experience. Kids with lots of screen time defaulting to it in their own homes (although they seem to have a good time here without it).

Anyway, I don't get this logic, as if-- even if it were true-- it proves unlimited screen time is awesome. IME, most kids with unlimited screen time cannot "take or leave it" at home-- at least, they spend a lot more time on screens, on average, than kids with limits. (I guess that might seem obvious, but a lot of parents without limits imply their kids don't use screens all that much because it's not ~*forbidden fruit*~.) So what if a kid who watches an hour a week is glued to screens at the house of a kid who watches 3 hours a day (especially when you average in weekends)? Of course, quantity is not the only measure of what is healthy-- but 1 hour/week at home + 50 hours/year on playdates (probably not nearly that high, but okay) = ~100 hours/year. 3 hours/day x 365 days = more than 1000 hours/year.
Anonymous
We allow an hour fri-sun during the sch year.
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