Help me support my DD’s effort to not eat meat

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My 12 yo DD two weeks ago stopped eating meat, for animal welfare reasons. She is a big eater and a food lover, so I know this is really hard for her. I am so proud of her and would like to support her as much as I can. Unfortunately we still cook with meat at least once a week and even though I try to plan an appealing vegetarian/pescatarian option for her, it is often haphazard and poorly cooked. I guess because I work full-time I haven’t been able to dedicate enough attention to rethinking our grocery shopping and meal plan. Anyway, to others who have been through this, what should I be doing to support her? Any specific tips for making the shift, any books we can buy, any reward system that might help? Thanks!

Don't want to be a dick here but a fish is also an animal.

But all OP said was that her daughter stopped eating meat.

Surprising that a few people think it's important to make sure OP's DD passes her veggie license test.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Fish is meat, maybe explain what vegetarian means to her while you support her? Surely you don't want her to end up that one pp who posted that she has been a vegetarian for 30 years and it works great, and she has no protein issues because her vegetarian diet includes fish? You don't want people to call your DD stupid like we did here to that pp, do you?

Actually PP - you didn't seem to read my actual post as I am vegetarian (lacto ovo) and not pescatarian so for me - no fish or meat products. It is very easy to find protein in a vegetarian diet as in addition to the beans and grains so many think of - with the eggs, cheese, yogurts, milks that typical vegetarians eat getting protein is easy- but so many seem ignorant of that focusing on loss of meat/fish as primary sources. But I didn't correct OP's terminology as she seems such a kind and as I said supportive mother to be asking for ways to make her DD's life easier as she embraces being a vegetarian - not the 'pescatarian' her DD appears to be. I won't call you stupid PP - that would be mean.

[Anonymous]

I became a vegetarian at about the age of 9....fend for myself mainly. I have to say I was not particularly healthy...lots of carbs and cheese. One thing that was always an option in my house was a baked potatoe or sweet potatoe and baked tofu.

[Anonymous]

I have a teen daughter who also turned vegetarian when she turned 12. I try to make meals that work for all, but if not, there's at least one thing for everyone.

Eg, burrito and/or quesadilla night. Beams, cheese, rice avacado and chicken or steak for meat eaters, just beans cheese rice and avacado for the non meat eaters (same for quesadillas, minus the rice)

Whole grain pasta (has protein!) with meat sauce for carnivores, alfredo sauce for vegetarian.

We do eggs once a week. Will do a spinach quiche on nights there is left over meat from another meal for teen son, who eats so much it's hard to keep up.

If I do a main that is meat, vegetarian daughter can have yogurt or cheese and crackers, or her current favorite, salad with chick peas.

[Anonymous]

I started at 17 and its not big deal. If she's not into tofu, going to fun places like Ramen and hot pot are good ways to get exposed to the different kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I started at 17 and its not big deal. If she's not into tofu, going to fun places like Ramen and hot pot are good ways to get exposed to the different kids.

Oh, also have her go on a B12 supplement. They make different versions from chewable to liquid to get to dissolving but its a huge issue for most vegetarian.

[Anonymous]

Have her help plan meals. 12 is old enough to plan and cook one or two meals a week. Make sure that she investigates what she needs to do to ensure that she satisfies her nutritional requirements.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My 12 yo DD two weeks ago stopped eating meat, for animal welfare reasons. She is a big eater and a food lover, so I know this is really hard for her. I am so proud of her and would like to support her as much as I can. Unfortunately we still cook with meat at least once a week and even though I try to plan an appealing vegetarian/pescatarian option for her, it is often haphazard and poorly cooked. I guess because I work full-time I haven’t been able to dedicate enough attention to rethinking our grocery shopping and meal plan. Anyway, to others who have been through this, what should I be doing to support her? Any specific tips for making the shift, any books we can buy, any reward system that might help? Thanks!

Don't want to be a dick here but a fish is also an animal.

But fish welfare issues are totally different from those related to the treatment of poultry, cattle, and pigs raised for meat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Fish is meat, maybe explain what vegetarian means to her while you support her? Surely you don't want her to end up that one pp who posted that she has been a vegetarian for 30 years and it works great, and she has no protein issues because her vegetarian diet includes fish? You don't want people to call your DD stupid like we did here to that pp, do you?

Actually PP - you didn't seem to read my actual post as I am vegetarian (lacto ovo) and not pescatarian so for me - no fish or meat products. It is very easy to find protein in a vegetarian diet as in addition to the beans and grains so many think of - with the eggs, cheese, yogurts, milks that typical vegetarians eat getting protein is easy- but so many seem ignorant of that focusing on loss of meat/fish as primary sources. But I didn't correct OP's terminology as she seems such a kind and as I said supportive mother to be asking for ways to make her DD's life easier as she embraces being a vegetarian - not the 'pescatarian' her DD appears to be. I won't call you stupid PP - that would be mean.

What? Is this OP? Where does it say in OP that you are vegetarian? This is a weird unrelated rant.

[Anonymous]

what about getting high quality meat from the original source? aren't there programs where you can share a cow or pig w/ another family? Just an idea... the animals are treated well and killed humanely.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:what about getting high quality meat from the original source? aren't there programs where you can share a cow or pig w/ another family? Just an idea... the animals are treated well and killed humanely.

Oh my. No animal is humanely killed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My 12 yo DD two weeks ago stopped eating meat, for animal welfare reasons. She is a big eater and a food lover, so I know this is really hard for her. I am so proud of her and would like to support her as much as I can. Unfortunately we still cook with meat at least once a week and even though I try to plan an appealing vegetarian/pescatarian option for her, it is often haphazard and poorly cooked. I guess because I work full-time I haven’t been able to dedicate enough attention to rethinking our grocery shopping and meal plan. Anyway, to others who have been through this, what should I be doing to support her? Any specific tips for making the shift, any books we can buy, any reward system that might help? Thanks!

So you have a discussion with your daughter about family dining. Explain that as a working mother, you only have a limited time to devote to shopping, meal planning and cooking. You can handle making 5 dinners a week that fit her new diet. She has a choice what to do those 2 days a week that you can't. Either you can buy easy to prepare meals that she can substitute (frozen microwave meals, meals like pho that you can just add hot water, etc) or she can learn to cook a few meals that she likes, and you can keep the components so that on days that you make an easy meal that includes meat, she can prepare her own meal. Or she can learn to cook for the family once or twice a week. But include her in the problem solving. Tell her the issue and have her help with the solution.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My 12 yo DD two weeks ago stopped eating meat, for animal welfare reasons. She is a big eater and a food lover, so I know this is really hard for her. I am so proud of her and would like to support her as much as I can. Unfortunately we still cook with meat at least once a week and even though I try to plan an appealing vegetarian/pescatarian option for her, it is often haphazard and poorly cooked. I guess because I work full-time I haven’t been able to dedicate enough attention to rethinking our grocery shopping and meal plan. Anyway, to others who have been through this, what should I be doing to support her? Any specific tips for making the shift, any books we can buy, any reward system that might help? Thanks!

So you have a discussion with your daughter about family dining. Explain that as a working mother, you only have a limited time to devote to shopping, meal planning and cooking. You can handle making 5 dinners a week that fit her new diet. She has a choice what to do those 2 days a week that you can't. Either you can buy easy to prepare meals that she can substitute (frozen microwave meals, meals like pho that you can just add hot water, etc) or she can learn to cook a few meals that she likes, and you can keep the components so that on days that you make an easy meal that includes meat, she can prepare her own meal. Or she can learn to cook for the family once or twice a week. But include her in the problem solving. Tell her the issue and have her help with the solution.

She can just eat sides.

[Anonymous]

We have one kid who turned vegetarian (only one in the family) about 3 years ago. We focus on high protein snacks and meals, even if the meals aren't as elaborate as the other meals: eggs, tortillas with cheese, edamame, vegetarian "chicken" fingers, milk, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The best way to support her is to teach her how to cook for herself.

If you require different meals due to preference and not health requirements (allergies, diabetes, Chrones, etc) the. You n3ed to learn to cook them yourself, especially if you are around middle school or older.

You also need to teach her proper nutrition, and remind her that there are nutrients her body needs, especially during puberty, that she won't get from a vegetarian diet if she does not do it correctly (like eating only celery, carrots, chips and mac n cheese type vegetarian).

You do not allow her to flirt with veganism. For a girl that age, it is a stepping stone to malnourishment and eating disorders. She can make that choice at 18 when she goes to college and is past puberty.

This is all very well stated. There is a lot of danger in allowing her to make her own way unsupported. At the very least you need to have her speak with her pediatrician and then also a dietician or nutritionist. Her body is at a critical growth and development period, and she must be sure she is supplying it with everything it needs. Additionally, watch closely to ensure that she does not become too limited in her diet because that may indicate food control issues indicating the presence of problems in the realm of anorexia or even bulimia. Your most important step, OP, as a mom will be to get her in to see her pediatrician and the dietician. Let them set up the parameters so that she is eating a well-balanced diet and then you can support her by providing the food stuffs and opportunities to prepare her meals that meet those requirements.