Husband’s complaint noises.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"I want you to WANT to do the dishes."

LOL YES!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"I want you to WANT to do the dishes."

LOL YES!

+1000

[Anonymous]

OP here. The thing I should have mentioned is that it sounds so ANGRY. lLike, not just weary or depressed but angry that he someone dropped a sock or left a crumb on a table. But anyway, yeah, not a huge deal in the scheme of things I guess. Thanks, everyone.

[Anonymous]

You can never sigh too dramatically.

I've said this to my kids, coworkers, friends, everybody. Hell, I've said it about myself. Just ignore it. If he's not doing to be passive-aggressive, like "Yet again, I am cleaning up YOUR mess" then just ignore it. Learn to love that sound - view that sound as "Oh good, Dan fixed something so it won't spill/get left out/whatever."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My husband helps out a lot around the house. Truly. He does a ton of laundry and dish washing and is a great dad. I am very lucky. But whenever he picks up a sock or straightens a pillow or closes a Tupperware or does just about anything, really, he makes this sound, this sort of big exhale sighing sound that if you were to put words to it sounds to me like “Oh my God this is so hard I can’t believe I have to do this why is my life so terrible.” I can’t overemphasize how constant this is. Like, all the time, every day. And even though we’ve talked about it and I’ve pointed out how his dad does the same thing he just never stops. It’s been driving me crazy for years. I alwaywant to say “WHATS THE MATTER?!!” It’s like the kind of noise a person makes when something unusually bad happens but he makes it over all the everyday little things we all deal with a hundred times a day. I am at the end of my rope.

Shut your pie-hole.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"I want you to WANT to do the dishes."

Lol, yup.

[Anonymous]

You must IGNORE it. Seriously. He does it because he is getting a reaction from you.

[Anonymous]

It could be worse. My husband does a scolding, tsk-tsk noise whenever he picks up something.

[Anonymous]

Wear earplugs

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. The thing I should have mentioned is that it sounds so ANGRY. lLike, not just weary or depressed but angry that he someone dropped a sock or left a crumb on a table. But anyway, yeah, not a huge deal in the scheme of things I guess. Thanks, everyone.

Oh this is totally my husband. It is passive aggressive.
He doesn't realize how it negatively affects the household. He'll also ask stupid questions like "Does this kitchen towel need to be on the floor?" Probably not, so just pick it up. When our son was a toddler, dh would act all bewildered when something was out of place. "I'm so confused, why is there a flashlight and a teddy bear in the middle of the kitchen floor?" I often found myself asking "what, did you forget there's a 2 year old living here?"

Meanwhile, my dh is the most disorganized clutter bug you could imagine. Every one of his spaces (closet, garage, desk, etc) is a disaster. I truly don't get it.

[Anonymous]

(pp here. He'd ask about the flashlight/bear with absolute irritation, as opposed to with humor).

[Anonymous]

Mine has a habit of laughing, briefly and scornfully, at any request that he help with something. It's maddening, very passive aggressive, but I also realize that I sometimes avoid asking because I know his "chuckle" will make me feel very low or angry.

[Anonymous]

If you've ignored it for years and it hasn't gone away, ask "What's wrong!?!? OMG are you OK?" very dramatically as well. Every.single.time.

Change the dynamic up.