Do small comments bother you?

[Anonymous]

How long have you been married? My MIL mellowed our with the comments after 20 years. It took about that long. For the first few years we were together I tried responding with some sort of conversation then I’d get annoyed or frustrated like you are. Then for a of years I simply said “okay” to everything and ignored.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How long have you been married? My MIL mellowed our with the comments after 20 years. It took about that long. For the first few years we were together I tried responding with some sort of conversation then I’d get annoyed or frustrated like you are. Then for a of years I simply said “okay” to everything and ignored.

+1. I'm even amused by some comments now, although there aren't that many so it's easier.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How long have you been married? My MIL mellowed our with the comments after 20 years. It took about that long. For the first few years we were together I tried responding with some sort of conversation then I’d get annoyed or frustrated like you are. Then for a of years I simply said “okay” to everything and ignored.

Saying ok and going on works. Also saying, " hey MIL, you are right. This is the size I bought DC, why don't you buy DC some new bigger shoes, new warmer coat, new BBQ sauce. That would be so helpful" or whatever it is.

[Anonymous]

I think the comments ypu mentioned I would let go, but keep an ear out for comments that could hurt your daughters feelings or she could internalize ( like her Clothes are too small in any way that implies she is fat). So far the insults are falling on you.

[Anonymous]

I get these types of comments from both my mom and my MIL. No matter how hard I try to laugh it off, they irk me sooo much and lately I always respond back... which isnt fun, but bc I dont like them thinking they can just be rude/ignorant/whatever it is. Even on Thxgiving when I hosted a huge meal, my mom noticed the rolls I got werent Pillsbury (they were from Whole Foods) and she said "oh how could u not get pillsbury. u always should get pillsbury." Same day she said my DS' hair "is getting long. Someone needs a hair cut." Like no kidding!!!! You think I dont make my kids hair cut appts every month? Sorry I ran behind on that this week as I was prepping this meal for us all to eat. The list goes on and on- I cant imagine ever thinking to say half the things they say.

[Anonymous]

"If you say so, Lynda."

[Anonymous]

Buddha says you have to let that shit go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"If you say so, Lynda."

???

[Anonymous]

Mil thinks:

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Those aren't "small comments." They are digs at your capacity as a parent. She's not a nice person.

Ignore this comment.

From a people person: Assume good intentions. She means well and she's concerned. She probably doesn't have people to engage with on a daily basis so redirect. How nice that she cares for your DD and she feels comfortable sharing with you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Those aren't "small comments." They are digs at your capacity as a parent. She's not a nice person.

SHUT UP!!
It is not

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I get these types of comments from both my mom and my MIL. No matter how hard I try to laugh it off, they irk me sooo much and lately I always respond back... which isnt fun, but bc I dont like them thinking they can just be rude/ignorant/whatever it is. Even on Thxgiving when I hosted a huge meal, my mom noticed the rolls I got werent Pillsbury (they were from Whole Foods) and she said "oh how could u not get pillsbury. u always should get pillsbury." Same day she said my DS' hair "is getting long. Someone needs a hair cut." Like no kidding!!!! You think I dont make my kids hair cut appts every month? Sorry I ran behind on that this week as I was prepping this meal for us all to eat. The list goes on and on- I cant imagine ever thinking to say half the things they say.

Wow
You are really sensitive

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't take any comments about not dressing kids warmly enough personally. My DS has 4 grandmas and the only thing they all agree on is that we never dressed him warmly enough. I think older folks forget that they are cold because they are old and their circulation isn't great. DC has always run warm and was fine, and still is in shorts and no coat on cold days. I imagine what they are thinking is the same thing the rest of us think when we see middle school kids at the bus stop all winter in shorts with no coat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get these types of comments from both my mom and my MIL. No matter how hard I try to laugh it off, they irk me sooo much and lately I always respond back... which isnt fun, but bc I dont like them thinking they can just be rude/ignorant/whatever it is. Even on Thxgiving when I hosted a huge meal, my mom noticed the rolls I got werent Pillsbury (they were from Whole Foods) and she said "oh how could u not get pillsbury. u always should get pillsbury." Same day she said my DS' hair "is getting long. Someone needs a hair cut." Like no kidding!!!! You think I dont make my kids hair cut appts every month? Sorry I ran behind on that this week as I was prepping this meal for us all to eat. The list goes on and on- I cant imagine ever thinking to say half the things they say.

Wow
You are really sensitive

Nope. I just dont see the need to always critique others or bring up negative topics versus positive ones.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get these types of comments from both my mom and my MIL. No matter how hard I try to laugh it off, they irk me sooo much and lately I always respond back... which isnt fun, but bc I dont like them thinking they can just be rude/ignorant/whatever it is. Even on Thxgiving when I hosted a huge meal, my mom noticed the rolls I got werent Pillsbury (they were from Whole Foods) and she said "oh how could u not get pillsbury. u always should get pillsbury." Same day she said my DS' hair "is getting long. Someone needs a hair cut." Like no kidding!!!! You think I dont make my kids hair cut appts every month? Sorry I ran behind on that this week as I was prepping this meal for us all to eat. The list goes on and on- I cant imagine ever thinking to say half the things they say.

Wow
You are really sensitive

Nope. I just dont see the need to always critique others or bring up negative topics versus positive ones.

Noticing your kid needs a haircut which already said he did and if he didn't ....no, he likes it long oh my God everything somebody says or notices sent you rushing off to the therapist ? And if it Thanksgiving I'll she said was something about the rules just let it roll off your back no pun intended seriously mom I like this brand and keep it moving oh my God .