| Practice ended at 4:15. DD walked home by 4:20. Had a snack and started HW. Finished HW at 6:30. Ate dinner. Left for lesson at 7:15. Wll ge home at 8:30. Can either relax or study until 9:30. In bed by 10. |
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My middle schooler played 4 sports, sang in a choir, participated in technical theater, did filmmaking, and volunteered. But he still wasn't spending 3 hours a night, 5 nights a week on activities except for a brief period of about 3 weeks each fall when his most intensive sport (3 practices and 2 game a week) overlapped with preparations for the school play. Other than that, things were staggered, so football and soccer stopped before choir practice ramped up. Filmmaking was mostly summer camps and weekend short courses, and we scheduled those when other things were light. In addition, much of his theater, and filmmaking and all of his choir practices were at his middle school so there was zero commute.
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My son has a severe processing speed disorder - he's very slow. Homework takes forever. Therefore, he only has two extra-curriculars: music and his native language. |
| my 8th grader plays club soccer-practice twice a week 630-8. Music lesson after school once a week. One night a week band practice 7-830. Theater two nights per week-6-9pm. Will do basketball in the winter as well. Sat: one rec game and fall baseball, Sunday one club soccer and one flag football game. He has plenty of time to do hw and his only night home is Friday. |
My DD has rowing on MWF and squash on T/Th. Rowing is in the fall and the spring and squash is all year round although she doesn't do it in the summer. She does her homework before she gets picked up for rowing and after she gets home. Same thing for squash. |
| My ds is in middle school and I have to say, I don't know any kid that has such an intensive practice every day. My kids do many different things (sports, music, religious school) during the week .Can we know what sport your dd is doing? |
This is really simple - you can't do an activity that meets for 2 hours every day and expect to have time for something else. |
Exactly. I don't get why OP is confused. A kid can do one very time consuming activity or multiple less time consuming activities. My 8th grader plays one sport that has practices 2-3x a week for about 1.5 hours each time. Attends 1 club that meets after school Attends another club that is 1 Sat. a.m. per month Goes to an art class 1 afternoon a week, and walks to that from our house Plays in the school band with daily practice + 1 private lesson per week Participates in Girl Scouts, usually 1-2 meetings per month Goes to church youth group Sun evening Monday - sport practice right after school Tues - music lesson Wed - art class after school Thurs - evening sport practice Fri - nothing Sat - sports practice, or skips it if it's the monthly meeting of hiking club Sun - 1-2x a month goes to Girl Scouts, evening church youth group (may skip it if GS activity goes into the evening) She still has a lot of downtime and plenty of time to get homework done. Also, she can only do a lot of different things because we're flexible and willing to make compromises about skipping some things, so she doesn't go to every GS activity since sometimes they conflict with a sport tournament or she might skip a sports practice because band has an extra afterschool practice. I know friends have had issues with coaches who think their sport is the most important thing in the whole world and a practice can never be skipped. We wouldn't last long in that kind of environment. |
My kid does travel lacrosse, tennis, and odyssey of the mind. For starters eleven BOTH sports done taken up 2hrs a night. Unless my kid is bound for the Olympics, I'd never sign them up for a sport that consumed 2hrs a night. My 7th grader is taking 2 HS classes and the homework and studying alone can consume 1.5hrs a night. We prioritize school, not sports. |
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My son does youth group at church Sundays, Boy Scouts on Mondays, a social club on Tuesdays. Once a month camping with Scouts, and probably a lock-in at church every other month.
Variety is the spice of life. It is OP's kids sports schedule that is crushing. |
| DS’s last year of MS was tough because we had overcommitted (even though it seemed doable). He played on team outside school and at school in the fall and spring. He didn’t get home from school until 3:45 on non-school sport days but we were back out the door by 5 for his other team several days of the week. He got home at 7:30 and showered and then ate dinner around 8. On days he had the school team, I often picked him up at 7 so he again got home at 7:30. He could have started homework immediately after school but he has always needed a break before settling in so he was doing homework from 8:30-10:30 most nights. It was exhausting for him. I could see some kids being able to do it if they got home from school earlier or had less homework. DD didn’t have many ECs in middle school but would have had time. She was home by 3 everyday and seemed to finish her homework within an hour. So I think it really depends on the workload, your child’s speed at completing homework, what time your child gets home, how frequent the commitment is for each activity, etc. DS is now in HS had committed to 2 teams for the fall but completely flipped out when he saw the schedules knowing he couldn’t get it all done. He quit one of them. |
I bet it's gymnastics or competitive dance. Or something equally as time consuming that requires very precise movements and loads of practice. Mine do multiple activities but we stayed away from those two for many reasons, including the time commitment. OP, the answer to your question is that other kids do multiple things that don't meet every single day of the week. If you're intent on sticking with it, it's best to just get used to it, realize it's not going to change, and will only get worse later. |
Why is your 7th grader spending THAT much time on homework?? Can't you give her some extra chill time at the end of the night. Instead of lights out at 830, like you have listed, how about push it to 9pm? For you, I think you just need to accept that X and Y days, you guys are going to be "busy" so just mentally prep for it knowing there isn't much down time those days. It's a good life lesson too. |
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I kept wondering how other kids were doing it as well and I had to finally accept the fact it came down to the fact that those kids really were just more advanced academically. They could finish homework and assignments with ease even in honors level classes and didn't need to study much. My child on the other hand just wasn't there and had to study and really devote time to homework in order to do well. It was tough making the realization as a parent and it's also tough for the kid but yes, they might not be able to continue with such a schedule.
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My DD is in 6th grade and her gymnastics practice is four hours (4-8), three school evenings a week. She gets off the bus, I whisk her to the gym, and she's back home a bit before 8:30pm. Those nights are tough for homework, and naturally it's her only activity, no time for anything else. |