PTA can't find new officers

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would make the commitment and do it except that our PTA the past few years has been very unwelcoming and not interested in having members participate so many of us gave up. Maybe you need to look at what you are doing as a group if no one is interested. I volunteered a few times this year at PTA things and felt very unwelcome. Its generally the working parents who are doing it so employment isn't the issue, the group of people running it and what they are doing is the issue along with the principal who is nasty.

I hear that a lot and don't believe people anymore when they say this. I've been yelled at by a fellow PTA officer and I still volunteered for the post I was voted into. People expect the teachers and PTA to fawn over them and grovel if they show up to help, but that can't be the case all the time. YOU'RE NOT DOING THIS FOR THE PLAUDITS. YOU'RE NOT DOING THIS FOR YOUR KID ONLY. These are the two things people must understand.

Surely you can understand why people wouldn't want to sign up for that, right? I don't let my boss yell at me, and I get paid at this job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would make the commitment and do it except that our PTA the past few years has been very unwelcoming and not interested in having members participate so many of us gave up. Maybe you need to look at what you are doing as a group if no one is interested. I volunteered a few times this year at PTA things and felt very unwelcome. Its generally the working parents who are doing it so employment isn't the issue, the group of people running it and what they are doing is the issue along with the principal who is nasty.

I hear that a lot and don't believe people anymore when they say this. I've been yelled at by a fellow PTA officer and I still volunteered for the post I was voted into. People expect the teachers and PTA to fawn over them and grovel if they show up to help, but that can't be the case all the time. YOU'RE NOT DOING THIS FOR THE PLAUDITS. YOU'RE NOT DOING THIS FOR YOUR KID ONLY. These are the two things people must understand.

I agree with this. People also have no idea how much time and energy PTA officers give to the school. It's insane. I cannot speak for any other school, but our PTA isn't unwelcoming-- it's getting shit done and we need help. It's not a social club, it's a second job. If volunteers expect to be celebrated for showing up, then they are not understanding the nature of the PTA or the people who work in it.

I expect people to be friendly, say hello if I say hello and say more than two words to me. And, if I try to help, don't say we have it under control as why ask for volunteers and waste my time if you don't want it. I am not there for social hour and have no interest in being friends.

[Anonymous]

Our PTA has a nominating committee. It finds people to run for the exec board. Does yours have one?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would make the commitment and do it except that our PTA the past few years has been very unwelcoming and not interested in having members participate so many of us gave up. Maybe you need to look at what you are doing as a group if no one is interested. I volunteered a few times this year at PTA things and felt very unwelcome. Its generally the working parents who are doing it so employment isn't the issue, the group of people running it and what they are doing is the issue along with the principal who is nasty.

I hear that a lot and don't believe people anymore when they say this. I've been yelled at by a fellow PTA officer and I still volunteered for the post I was voted into. People expect the teachers and PTA to fawn over them and grovel if they show up to help, but that can't be the case all the time. YOU'RE NOT DOING THIS FOR THE PLAUDITS. YOU'RE NOT DOING THIS FOR YOUR KID ONLY. These are the two things people must understand.

Np, but I agree with the first poster. Second poster, you must have some strange situations at your school and I'm sorry if you are getting just parents wanting shoulder pats but most of us with this problem relate to the first poster-- just unwelcoming and very disorganized. These are probably self perpetuating with the hoggy disorganized pta throw up their hands and say, i'll do it myself! It is really too bad.

The OP sounds like neither of these cases, just a school where everyone is too busy and hoping to freeload or skate through. There are great ideas on here for job sharing.

Oh no, believe me. I have friends in all our area's public schools, and the ones who don't volunteer always say it's "because they don't feel welcome" and "the PTA is so cliquey". When I happen to know these particular PTAs work extremely hard and would really like to have more help!

It's a vicious cycle because the PTA officers in place have no one to replace themselves so they stay for years and get to know each other, and talk to each other, thereby giving others the impression that they exclude others, when in fact they don't, but that's because no one has volunteered to help. See?

There's another thing I've noticed: many parents want to participate in decision-making, without doing the actual work. That's not how it works! So when they ask for more of a say in cultural arts programming, or STEM activities, and complain that the school/PTA (of course they conflate the two) should do X instead of Y, and I reply: "Great! You can apply for the post and if voted in, we will gladly give you free rein" all of a sudden, there's no one They're just "too busy", and it was "just a suggestion".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would make the commitment and do it except that our PTA the past few years has been very unwelcoming and not interested in having members participate so many of us gave up. Maybe you need to look at what you are doing as a group if no one is interested. I volunteered a few times this year at PTA things and felt very unwelcome. Its generally the working parents who are doing it so employment isn't the issue, the group of people running it and what they are doing is the issue along with the principal who is nasty.

I hear that a lot and don't believe people anymore when they say this. I've been yelled at by a fellow PTA officer and I still volunteered for the post I was voted into. People expect the teachers and PTA to fawn over them and grovel if they show up to help, but that can't be the case all the time. YOU'RE NOT DOING THIS FOR THE PLAUDITS. YOU'RE NOT DOING THIS FOR YOUR KID ONLY. These are the two things people must understand.

I agree with this. People also have no idea how much time and energy PTA officers give to the school. It's insane. I cannot speak for any other school, but our PTA isn't unwelcoming-- it's getting shit done and we need help. It's not a social club, it's a second job. If volunteers expect to be celebrated for showing up, then they are not understanding the nature of the PTA or the people who work in it.

I expect people to be friendly, say hello if I say hello and say more than two words to me. And, if I try to help, don't say we have it under control as why ask for volunteers and waste my time if you don't want it. I am not there for social hour and have no interest in being friends.

PP here. Well, but at least with your second point, that's the kind of thing I mean. You signed up to volunteer-- you get there and they unexpectedly have a bunch more volunteers than they need. They say they have it under control...and you get your nose out of joint and claim it is unwelcoming. This is the sort of thing that makes me insane-- there is no sabotage, it's just a group of people trying to move the ball forward. Be happy you have that hour free or go volunteer to do something else.

(But yes, to your first point, people should always be pleasant and say hello.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would make the commitment and do it except that our PTA the past few years has been very unwelcoming and not interested in having members participate so many of us gave up. Maybe you need to look at what you are doing as a group if no one is interested. I volunteered a few times this year at PTA things and felt very unwelcome. Its generally the working parents who are doing it so employment isn't the issue, the group of people running it and what they are doing is the issue along with the principal who is nasty.

I hear that a lot and don't believe people anymore when they say this. I've been yelled at by a fellow PTA officer and I still volunteered for the post I was voted into. People expect the teachers and PTA to fawn over them and grovel if they show up to help, but that can't be the case all the time. YOU'RE NOT DOING THIS FOR THE PLAUDITS. YOU'RE NOT DOING THIS FOR YOUR KID ONLY. These are the two things people must understand.

Surely you can understand why people wouldn't want to sign up for that, right? I don't let my boss yell at me, and I get paid at this job.

No. Because most of the people who complain are not getting yelled at, they just "felt" unwelcome because the red carpet wasn't rolled out. I used my personal experience as an extreme example to illustrate that you're really not doing this to stoke your own ego, but to give back to your community. This is what volunteering is all about. It is its own reward.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would make the commitment and do it except that our PTA the past few years has been very unwelcoming and not interested in having members participate so many of us gave up. Maybe you need to look at what you are doing as a group if no one is interested. I volunteered a few times this year at PTA things and felt very unwelcome. Its generally the working parents who are doing it so employment isn't the issue, the group of people running it and what they are doing is the issue along with the principal who is nasty.

I hear that a lot and don't believe people anymore when they say this. I've been yelled at by a fellow PTA officer and I still volunteered for the post I was voted into. People expect the teachers and PTA to fawn over them and grovel if they show up to help, but that can't be the case all the time. YOU'RE NOT DOING THIS FOR THE PLAUDITS. YOU'RE NOT DOING THIS FOR YOUR KID ONLY. These are the two things people must understand.

Np, but I agree with the first poster. Second poster, you must have some strange situations at your school and I'm sorry if you are getting just parents wanting shoulder pats but most of us with this problem relate to the first poster-- just unwelcoming and very disorganized. These are probably self perpetuating with the hoggy disorganized pta throw up their hands and say, i'll do it myself! It is really too bad.

The OP sounds like neither of these cases, just a school where everyone is too busy and hoping to freeload or skate through. There are great ideas on here for job sharing.

Oh no, believe me. I have friends in all our area's public schools, and the ones who don't volunteer always say it's "because they don't feel welcome" and "the PTA is so cliquey". When I happen to know these particular PTAs work extremely hard and would really like to have more help!

It's a vicious cycle because the PTA officers in place have no one to replace themselves so they stay for years and get to know each other, and talk to each other, thereby giving others the impression that they exclude others, when in fact they don't, but that's because no one has volunteered to help. See?

There's another thing I've noticed: many parents want to participate in decision-making, without doing the actual work. That's not how it works! So when they ask for more of a say in cultural arts programming, or STEM activities, and complain that the school/PTA (of course they conflate the two) should do X instead of Y, and I reply: "Great! You can apply for the post and if voted in, we will gladly give you free rein" all of a sudden, there's no one They're just "too busy", and it was "just a suggestion".

OMG THIS. I had a nickel for every person who tells me about how "The PTA should do XXXXXX..." and then run screaming when we say, "that's a great idea! Can you set it up and execute?" I would be able to avoid all this and send my kid to private school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would make the commitment and do it except that our PTA the past few years has been very unwelcoming and not interested in having members participate so many of us gave up. Maybe you need to look at what you are doing as a group if no one is interested. I volunteered a few times this year at PTA things and felt very unwelcome. Its generally the working parents who are doing it so employment isn't the issue, the group of people running it and what they are doing is the issue along with the principal who is nasty.

I hear that a lot and don't believe people anymore when they say this. I've been yelled at by a fellow PTA officer and I still volunteered for the post I was voted into. People expect the teachers and PTA to fawn over them and grovel if they show up to help, but that can't be the case all the time. YOU'RE NOT DOING THIS FOR THE PLAUDITS. YOU'RE NOT DOING THIS FOR YOUR KID ONLY. These are the two things people must understand.

I agree with this. People also have no idea how much time and energy PTA officers give to the school. It's insane. I cannot speak for any other school, but our PTA isn't unwelcoming-- it's getting shit done and we need help. It's not a social club, it's a second job. If volunteers expect to be celebrated for showing up, then they are not understanding the nature of the PTA or the people who work in it.

I expect people to be friendly, say hello if I say hello and say more than two words to me. And, if I try to help, don't say we have it under control as why ask for volunteers and waste my time if you don't want it. I am not there for social hour and have no interest in being friends.

PP here. Well, but at least with your second point, that's the kind of thing I mean. You signed up to volunteer-- you get there and they unexpectedly have a bunch more volunteers than they need. They say they have it under control...and you get your nose out of joint and claim it is unwelcoming. This is the sort of thing that makes me insane-- there is no sabotage, it's just a group of people trying to move the ball forward. Be happy you have that hour free or go volunteer to do something else.

(But yes, to your first point, people should always be pleasant and say hello.)

Exactly. It's not personal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would make the commitment and do it except that our PTA the past few years has been very unwelcoming and not interested in having members participate so many of us gave up. Maybe you need to look at what you are doing as a group if no one is interested. I volunteered a few times this year at PTA things and felt very unwelcome. Its generally the working parents who are doing it so employment isn't the issue, the group of people running it and what they are doing is the issue along with the principal who is nasty.

I hear that a lot and don't believe people anymore when they say this. I've been yelled at by a fellow PTA officer and I still volunteered for the post I was voted into. People expect the teachers and PTA to fawn over them and grovel if they show up to help, but that can't be the case all the time. YOU'RE NOT DOING THIS FOR THE PLAUDITS. YOU'RE NOT DOING THIS FOR YOUR KID ONLY. These are the two things people must understand.

I agree with this. People also have no idea how much time and energy PTA officers give to the school. It's insane. I cannot speak for any other school, but our PTA isn't unwelcoming-- it's getting shit done and we need help. It's not a social club, it's a second job. If volunteers expect to be celebrated for showing up, then they are not understanding the nature of the PTA or the people who work in it.

I expect people to be friendly, say hello if I say hello and say more than two words to me. And, if I try to help, don't say we have it under control as why ask for volunteers and waste my time if you don't want it. I am not there for social hour and have no interest in being friends.

PP here. Well, but at least with your second point, that's the kind of thing I mean. You signed up to volunteer-- you get there and they unexpectedly have a bunch more volunteers than they need. They say they have it under control...and you get your nose out of joint and claim it is unwelcoming. This is the sort of thing that makes me insane-- there is no sabotage, it's just a group of people trying to move the ball forward. Be happy you have that hour free or go volunteer to do something else.

(But yes, to your first point, people should always be pleasant and say hello.)

I was the only person who actually signed up. They had all the PTA staff and some friends so they didn't actually need anyone so why ask for help, have me rearrange my day to do it as well as my husband's to get the kids from school so I could stay and help when they have no intention of using me. I would have had that hour free to spend with my kids if I wasn't there and my husband would not have had to rearrange his schedule. Why ask for help if you aren't going to us it? Part of the issue was they weren't prepared and didn't have supplies so there wasn't much to do. I had offered to help get the supplies and was turned down. They did not have it under control.

[Anonymous]

There's another thing I've noticed: many parents want to participate in decision-making, without doing the actual work. That's not how it works! So when they ask for more of a say in cultural arts programming, or STEM activities, and complain that the school/PTA (of course they conflate the two) should do X instead of Y, and I reply: "Great! You can apply for the post and if voted in, we will gladly give you free rein" all of a sudden, there's no one They're just "too busy", and it was "just a suggestion".

OMG THIS. I had a nickel for every person who tells me about how "The PTA should do XXXXXX..." and then run screaming when we say, "that's a great idea! Can you set it up and execute?" I would be able to avoid all this and send my kid to private school.

YES. So many times I have parents approach me and say "The school should really....." or "My friend's school's PTA does......" but they NEVER want to actually take the lead.

It's infuriating because we're all working parents, and it's not like I can just add another huge project to my current PTA duties, even if the school that your child's preschool friend attended has that thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would make the commitment and do it except that our PTA the past few years has been very unwelcoming and not interested in having members participate so many of us gave up. Maybe you need to look at what you are doing as a group if no one is interested. I volunteered a few times this year at PTA things and felt very unwelcome. Its generally the working parents who are doing it so employment isn't the issue, the group of people running it and what they are doing is the issue along with the principal who is nasty.

I hear that a lot and don't believe people anymore when they say this. I've been yelled at by a fellow PTA officer and I still volunteered for the post I was voted into. People expect the teachers and PTA to fawn over them and grovel if they show up to help, but that can't be the case all the time. YOU'RE NOT DOING THIS FOR THE PLAUDITS. YOU'RE NOT DOING THIS FOR YOUR KID ONLY. These are the two things people must understand.

I agree with this. People also have no idea how much time and energy PTA officers give to the school. It's insane. I cannot speak for any other school, but our PTA isn't unwelcoming-- it's getting shit done and we need help. It's not a social club, it's a second job. If volunteers expect to be celebrated for showing up, then they are not understanding the nature of the PTA or the people who work in it.

I expect people to be friendly, say hello if I say hello and say more than two words to me. And, if I try to help, don't say we have it under control as why ask for volunteers and waste my time if you don't want it. I am not there for social hour and have no interest in being friends.

PP here. Well, but at least with your second point, that's the kind of thing I mean. You signed up to volunteer-- you get there and they unexpectedly have a bunch more volunteers than they need. They say they have it under control...and you get your nose out of joint and claim it is unwelcoming. This is the sort of thing that makes me insane-- there is no sabotage, it's just a group of people trying to move the ball forward. Be happy you have that hour free or go volunteer to do something else.

(But yes, to your first point, people should always be pleasant and say hello.)

I was the only person who actually signed up. They had all the PTA staff and some friends so they didn't actually need anyone so why ask for help, have me rearrange my day to do it as well as my husband's to get the kids from school so I could stay and help when they have no intention of using me. I would have had that hour free to spend with my kids if I wasn't there and my husband would not have had to rearrange his schedule. Why ask for help if you aren't going to us it? Part of the issue was they weren't prepared and didn't have supplies so there wasn't much to do. I had offered to help get the supplies and was turned down. They did not have it under control.

I understand you're frustrated, but it's the nature of the job. Sometimes these things happens: they're afraid that people won't show up, so they beg their friends to come and then end up not needing that many people. Sometimes someone doesn't calculate the supplies right - and these go on the PTA tab, so if the budget is tight, perhaps the person responsible didn't want to over-buy. I've known generous volunteers buy stuff and refuse to be reimbursed, but I am under the obligation to assume that they will need reimbursement.

This scenario has happened to me multiple times. Instead of feeling offended, I talk to people. It's a great opportunity to find out what goes on at the school, who are the best teachers in the next grades, the ones to avoid, anything you want to know, from other parents. Use the time to your advantage.

[Anonymous]

Be the Change folks, be the change.

Each year almost 6 of our 15 positions are new K parents eager to get going. It's great.

[Anonymous]

This is OP: I "think" the current officers have been working the phones and trying to convince people, though I'm not sure (they have certainly sent many emails to the PTA list serve - the only school-wide list serve we have - but I know that there are still many people not on that list). Right now we have "co-presidents", which I thought was legit but maybe it's not... But I hope it is because I don't see any one person agreeing to do it alone.

There has been NO effort by the school principal to highlight this issue or ask for people to engage, which is concerning to me.

I like the idea of reaching out to incoming K parents, though not sure where to get their info and how we would get it done with such little time left.

I am currently signed up to be the MCC-PTA delegate for our school, and I also serve on two PTA committees (including running an event this past year), and both my husband and I volunteer constantly for field trips, class parties, gathering money for teacher gifts, other events. All of this seemed like a sufficient contribution and yet here we are stressing about the possible dissolution of the PTA and what we can do to prevent that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Be the Change folks, be the change.

Each year almost 6 of our 15 positions are new K parents eager to get going. It's great.

+1 this. If you don't like what your PTA board does and think they're unfriendly/disorganized, etc then run for a board position and be super friendly and organized next year. The PTA board is just parents who spend lots of their time taking on an inpatient second job. They're not in the customer service industry and sometimes they might be worn out or disorganized. If you don't like the way it's done, be productive and do it differently instead of just complaining about people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is OP: I "think" the current officers have been working the phones and trying to convince people, though I'm not sure (they have certainly sent many emails to the PTA list serve - the only school-wide list serve we have - but I know that there are still many people not on that list). Right now we have "co-presidents", which I thought was legit but maybe it's not... But I hope it is because I don't see any one person agreeing to do it alone.

There has been NO effort by the school principal to highlight this issue or ask for people to engage, which is concerning to me.

I like the idea of reaching out to incoming K parents, though not sure where to get their info and how we would get it done with such little time left.

I am currently signed up to be the MCC-PTA delegate for our school, and I also serve on two PTA committees (including running an event this past year), and both my husband and I volunteer constantly for field trips, class parties, gathering money for teacher gifts, other events. All of this seemed like a sufficient contribution and yet here we are stressing about the possible dissolution of the PTA and what we can do to prevent that.

Send out hard copy flyers in backpacks to reach the people not on the listserve. Obviously bring it up at your PTA meeting next week and try to get people to step up.

Go to the MCCPTA training next Monday and ask them for help. You need to set a drop dead date for your PTA - i.e. if no one steps up by June 15 we will begin the process to dissolve the PTA.

That process is outlined in your bylaws. As MCCPTA delegate, you should have a copy of them. If you don't, ask your current president (legally there can be only one). Find out who is listed with the MDPTA as president.