Developmentally delayed 18 month old- need help understanding it

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I have an 18 month old that is considered developmentally delayed in gross motor, fine motor and speech. He sees a developmental pediatrician, a regular pediatrician and is seeing various therapist through the county. This is all new to me and I find that everyone is really trying to not worry me or can’t answer my questions. So I will ask here, hoping someone has experience or advice. Are some children just developmentally delayed with no cause? Do these children just catch up to their peers? Will these delays be apparent in early elementary school? I’m sorry if I am not making sense or asking silly questions. I am truly trying to understand everything and get him all the help he needs.


Are some children just developmentally delayed with no cause?
Yes.

Do these children just catch up to their peers?
Sometimes.

If not, often diagnoses become more specific as time goes on. Delays can caused by injury, genetic or neurological disorder, or autoimmune disease for example. That's why you address the present symptoms and add in more invasive testing as necessary.

Will these delays be apparent in early elementary school?
Sometimes.

Apparent to others? Don't waste your energy on what others think.
Apparent through evaluations? Often yes. And that's a good thing so you can figure out how best to help your kid.

Bravo, op, for taking action in the here and now. Even if issues linger in the future, early intervention helps.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:When we were in your place, we did only the EI therapies. Our son started walking a little before he turned two. Now, we are more concerned about his speech delay than gross or fine motor delays. (He's not yet 3.5 and talks like our older child did at 2.5.) So now we are adding intensive private therapy. I'd wait until your son is almost 2 and start private speech and/or physical therapy then if you think it's needed. I know you are in a tough spot right now because you have no idea what the future holds. No one does, so no one can reliably tell you what therapy is "best" or "enough". That is hard to accept. But your child is still quite young, and age 2 is still early intervention. Good luck!


You can wait a bit for private speech. We didn't find speech therapy that helpful before age 3 BUT I would not wait to get PT/OT in place privately given the delays.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:When we were in your place, we did only the EI therapies. Our son started walking a little before he turned two. Now, we are more concerned about his speech delay than gross or fine motor delays. (He's not yet 3.5 and talks like our older child did at 2.5.) So now we are adding intensive private therapy. I'd wait until your son is almost 2 and start private speech and/or physical therapy then if you think it's needed. I know you are in a tough spot right now because you have no idea what the future holds. No one does, so no one can reliably tell you what therapy is "best" or "enough". That is hard to accept. But your child is still quite young, and age 2 is still early intervention. Good luck!


You can wait a bit for private speech. We didn't find speech therapy that helpful before age 3 BUT I would not wait to get PT/OT in place privately given the delays.


3 isn't a magic number. If a kid qualifies for EI services at 18 months, there is a definite delay. ST is the correct course of action when there's a delay whether it's public or private.
Anonymous
Just to let you know that most insurances will cover PT and OT up until 3 years old. After that they may only offer a limited number of sessions.
Anonymous
PT here. Don't burn yourself out. Parents feel so much pressure to get all this done by age 3 because of a misunderstanding about how the brain develops. Pace yourself. Have fun with your kid. I know that's hard, but you're the parent and keeping yourself & your family sane, and loving your baby -- that's your #1 job. I've seen many families completely ravaged by the time their kid is three because of all that pressure. Take your time and it's okay to say no to therapy and yes to a trip to the park once in a while!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I have an 18 month old that is considered developmentally delayed in gross motor, fine motor and speech. He sees a developmental pediatrician, a regular pediatrician and is seeing various therapist through the county. This is all new to me and I find that everyone is really trying to not worry me or can’t answer my questions. So I will ask here, hoping someone has experience or advice. Are some children just developmentally delayed with no cause? Do these children just catch up to their peers? Will these delays be apparent in early elementary school? I’m sorry if I am not making sense or asking silly questions. I am truly trying to understand everything and get him all the help he needs.


Some kids have delays or "issues" and catch up with therapy (or sometimes no therapy) and are fine and by the time they reach elementary school they are indistinguishable from their peers. At 18 months it's not possible to tell which kids are in this class and which kids have real motoric problems or conditions that will stay with them. That's why Early Intervention is appropriate and important.

The majority of kids will be fine. If your child is sitting independently by age two and learning to walk/stand, then chances are he will be fine.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:PT here. Don't burn yourself out. Parents feel so much pressure to get all this done by age 3 because of a misunderstanding about how the brain develops. Pace yourself. Have fun with your kid. I know that's hard, but you're the parent and keeping yourself & your family sane, and loving your baby -- that's your #1 job. I've seen many families completely ravaged by the time their kid is three because of all that pressure. Take your time and it's okay to say no to therapy and yes to a trip to the park once in a while!


We found 3-5 the most critical time for therapies. I would be concerned about walking and those issues, but agree to pace yourself. Its very easy to get overwhelmed and burnt out. Some kids do catch up on their own but for those of us whose kids need years of therapy, pacing is really important. Early on our developmental ped put a lot of pressure on us to do 20+ hours of ABA (very few providers would even do this), preschool, an activity, speech and OT and it was really overwhelming. We did it for months and said forget it and cut back.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:PT here. Don't burn yourself out. Parents feel so much pressure to get all this done by age 3 because of a misunderstanding about how the brain develops. Pace yourself. Have fun with your kid. I know that's hard, but you're the parent and keeping yourself & your family sane, and loving your baby -- that's your #1 job. I've seen many families completely ravaged by the time their kid is three because of all that pressure. Take your time and it's okay to say no to therapy and yes to a trip to the park once in a while!


We found 3-5 the most critical time for therapies. I would be concerned about walking and those issues, but agree to pace yourself. Its very easy to get overwhelmed and burnt out. Some kids do catch up on their own but for those of us whose kids need years of therapy, pacing is really important. Early on our developmental ped put a lot of pressure on us to do 20+ hours of ABA (very few providers would even do this), preschool, an activity, speech and OT and it was really overwhelming. We did it for months and said forget it and cut back.


Hindsight is 20/20, so generalizing your individual situation is meaningless to the op. The the earlier the intervention the better--based on research. You address the deficits within reason, try to find balance in life, and don't drive yourself crazy. The op is on the right track.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:PT here. Don't burn yourself out. Parents feel so much pressure to get all this done by age 3 because of a misunderstanding about how the brain develops. Pace yourself. Have fun with your kid. I know that's hard, but you're the parent and keeping yourself & your family sane, and loving your baby -- that's your #1 job. I've seen many families completely ravaged by the time their kid is three because of all that pressure. Take your time and it's okay to say no to therapy and yes to a trip to the park once in a while!


We found 3-5 the most critical time for therapies. I would be concerned about walking and those issues, but agree to pace yourself. Its very easy to get overwhelmed and burnt out. Some kids do catch up on their own but for those of us whose kids need years of therapy, pacing is really important. Early on our developmental ped put a lot of pressure on us to do 20+ hours of ABA (very few providers would even do this), preschool, an activity, speech and OT and it was really overwhelming. We did it for months and said forget it and cut back.


Hindsight is 20/20, so generalizing your individual situation is meaningless to the op. The the earlier the intervention the better--based on research. You address the deficits within reason, try to find balance in life, and don't drive yourself crazy. The op is on the right track.


They aren't doing much with in speech therapy before age 3. You are kidding yourself if you think they are with a non-verbal child. Before three, a child who is going to catch up, is going to start before then on their own. Early intervention is good but its not the be all and end all to everything. Pacing is important and not overdoing it and that is what the Pt was saying which I wish someone had said to us.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:PT here. Don't burn yourself out. Parents feel so much pressure to get all this done by age 3 because of a misunderstanding about how the brain develops. Pace yourself. Have fun with your kid. I know that's hard, but you're the parent and keeping yourself & your family sane, and loving your baby -- that's your #1 job. I've seen many families completely ravaged by the time their kid is three because of all that pressure. Take your time and it's okay to say no to therapy and yes to a trip to the park once in a while!


We found 3-5 the most critical time for therapies. I would be concerned about walking and those issues, but agree to pace yourself. Its very easy to get overwhelmed and burnt out. Some kids do catch up on their own but for those of us whose kids need years of therapy, pacing is really important. Early on our developmental ped put a lot of pressure on us to do 20+ hours of ABA (very few providers would even do this), preschool, an activity, speech and OT and it was really overwhelming. We did it for months and said forget it and cut back.


Hindsight is 20/20, so generalizing your individual situation is meaningless to the op. The the earlier the intervention the better--based on research. You address the deficits within reason, try to find balance in life, and don't drive yourself crazy. The op is on the right track.


They aren't doing much with in speech therapy before age 3. You are kidding yourself if you think they are with a non-verbal child. Before three, a child who is going to catch up, is going to start before then on their own. Early intervention is good but its not the be all and end all to everything. Pacing is important and not overdoing it and that is what the Pt was saying which I wish someone had said to us.


Again PP, reasearch proves you incorrect. No one knows which kids will catch up or not. Speech therapy does help kids before age 3 even non-verbal ones.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:PT here. Don't burn yourself out. Parents feel so much pressure to get all this done by age 3 because of a misunderstanding about how the brain develops. Pace yourself. Have fun with your kid. I know that's hard, but you're the parent and keeping yourself & your family sane, and loving your baby -- that's your #1 job. I've seen many families completely ravaged by the time their kid is three because of all that pressure. Take your time and it's okay to say no to therapy and yes to a trip to the park once in a while!


We found 3-5 the most critical time for therapies. I would be concerned about walking and those issues, but agree to pace yourself. Its very easy to get overwhelmed and burnt out. Some kids do catch up on their own but for those of us whose kids need years of therapy, pacing is really important. Early on our developmental ped put a lot of pressure on us to do 20+ hours of ABA (very few providers would even do this), preschool, an activity, speech and OT and it was really overwhelming. We did it for months and said forget it and cut back.


Hindsight is 20/20, so generalizing your individual situation is meaningless to the op. The the earlier the intervention the better--based on research. You address the deficits within reason, try to find balance in life, and don't drive yourself crazy. The op is on the right track.


They aren't doing much with in speech therapy before age 3. You are kidding yourself if you think they are with a non-verbal child. Before three, a child who is going to catch up, is going to start before then on their own. Early intervention is good but its not the be all and end all to everything. Pacing is important and not overdoing it and that is what the Pt was saying which I wish someone had said to us.


Again PP, reasearch proves you incorrect. No one knows which kids will catch up or not. Speech therapy does help kids before age 3 even non-verbal ones.


+ a million

I would say that this age (under three) is the most critical for nonverbal children to get intervention. Speech therapy is not just for the goal of producing speech. It's for communication. Children at age two who are nonverbal become very frustrated and can have behavioral impacts and social impacts. It's important to provide communication -- augmentative communication, signs, speech devices, etc. Speech therapy can do so much for children under age three and this point of view is twenty years old.

Moreover, as the PP said, it's impossible to tell which kids are slated to catch up and which aren't. If your kid is destined to be nonverbal, you've lost 3 precious years of the "window" of intervention. When you are trying to introduce an augmentative device, that's HUGE.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:PT here. Don't burn yourself out. Parents feel so much pressure to get all this done by age 3 because of a misunderstanding about how the brain develops. Pace yourself. Have fun with your kid. I know that's hard, but you're the parent and keeping yourself & your family sane, and loving your baby -- that's your #1 job. I've seen many families completely ravaged by the time their kid is three because of all that pressure. Take your time and it's okay to say no to therapy and yes to a trip to the park once in a while!


We found 3-5 the most critical time for therapies. I would be concerned about walking and those issues, but agree to pace yourself. Its very easy to get overwhelmed and burnt out. Some kids do catch up on their own but for those of us whose kids need years of therapy, pacing is really important. Early on our developmental ped put a lot of pressure on us to do 20+ hours of ABA (very few providers would even do this), preschool, an activity, speech and OT and it was really overwhelming. We did it for months and said forget it and cut back.


Hindsight is 20/20, so generalizing your individual situation is meaningless to the op. The the earlier the intervention the better--based on research. You address the deficits within reason, try to find balance in life, and don't drive yourself crazy. The op is on the right track.


They aren't doing much with in speech therapy before age 3. You are kidding yourself if you think they are with a non-verbal child. Before three, a child who is going to catch up, is going to start before then on their own. Early intervention is good but its not the be all and end all to everything. Pacing is important and not overdoing it and that is what the Pt was saying which I wish someone had said to us.


Again PP, reasearch proves you incorrect. No one knows which kids will catch up or not. Speech therapy does help kids before age 3 even non-verbal ones.


+ a million

I would say that this age (under three) is the most critical for nonverbal children to get intervention. Speech therapy is not just for the goal of producing speech. It's for communication. Children at age two who are nonverbal become very frustrated and can have behavioral impacts and social impacts. It's important to provide communication -- augmentative communication, signs, speech devices, etc. Speech therapy can do so much for children under age three and this point of view is twenty years old.

Moreover, as the PP said, it's impossible to tell which kids are slated to catch up and which aren't. If your kid is destined to be nonverbal, you've lost 3 precious years of the "window" of intervention. When you are trying to introduce an augmentative device, that's HUGE.


Former PT here. No one is saying not to do interventions before age three. But, to quote an article, "Experts are overthrowing the old dogma that, by the ripe old age of 3, the human brain is relatively fixed in form and function." That means that people used to think that the brain was pretty much finished growing and couldn't change much by age three. This is because scientists studied the size and structure and connections in the brain, and found that there were big changes that happened from 0-3 and that age 3 looked a lot like an adult. This is true, and therapy in the early years is important. However, there should not be any pressure on parents to force a lifetime of therapy into three years. Practitioners and researchers aren't all brain experts, and tend to stick with what they've learned in school and what they've been spouting off for years, and public policy has been created and research has been done based on these false assumptions.

So yes, do therapy from age 0-3. It is important. I have seen older children & teens who came here from other countries never having had therapy, and there was a definite difference. I don't recommend that. We could do very little for some of them at that point. However, depending on your child (and I don't mean the OP but just in general), you could be facing a lifetime of therapy and full-time care, and if you exhaust yourself in the first three years which are already exhausting, it's not good for your family. Honestly the best outcomes I saw were often from families who were so laid back I could barely stand it. They were compliant enough and had great access to care thanks to our county's programs, but were often from other cultures and didn't really buy into this whole American over-achieving mindset. Now I try to use that philosophy with my own kids who have various special needs, since I tend toward over-achieving. I'll take 5-10% less function for 50-100% more family peace and I really think that's a pretty correct ratio. If the cost of therapy is stress, well if you look at the research, that's definitely something that doesn't lead to good outcomes from 0-3 or beyond.
Anonymous
That's exactly what a pp was saying--that ST doesn't do much before age 3--utter bollocks.
Anonymous
I have a teen with a severe language disorder and I agree you need to pace yourself. My son has been doing therapies since he was 23 months old, but still is severely delayed. Throwing more therapies at the situation did not help. It started to stress us all out and shut him down. His language actually moved forward when we starting traveling and hailing some damn fun instead of treating him like he was something that needed to be fixed.

And the 3 year old window is untrue. Most of his came in after he was 9, just like the experts we consulted said it would.
Anonymous
There's also a bit of a fallacy of "speech" coming in. This isn't always the issue. Sometimes it does/sometimes it doesn't. The point of early intervention is also to help kids communicate better. Sometimes this will happen with speech, sometimes through other forms of communication. That's okay.
post reply Forum Index » Kids With Special Needs and Disabilities
Message Quick Reply
Go to: