I'm a 40 year old divorced guy with a son, who I have 50% of the time. I'm dating a 42 year old woman with a daughter who she has practically all the time. I think it's going well. I date her when I don't have my son. And she will pay for babysitters so we can go out (usually when her daughter is asleep). It works because I'm fortunate that she's willing to do that. And because, when I have my son, she's very cool with the fact that he is my priority.
I don't know exactly where it is going and if it will lead to re-marriage one day. But I think that is the benefit of us both having been married before. I don't think either of us really need for it to progress further and we're taking the time to figure it out. I think she's a really great girlfriend, and I'm glad to have her in my life. Consequently, I try to do what I can to make her happy. But the key, I think, is that she's inherently very generous and wonderful, which makes it easy for me.
Before I met her -- and following my divorce -- I dated many different women that I met through various dating apps. I think the apps are fine if you recognize that they're not perfect and adjust your expectations. Most women I met were nothing like their profile, either because they had misleading pics about their appearance, or because they were selling a narrative that didn't completely map to their reality. I don't mean to blame them: I likely do that too to an extent. But I think, if you're going to use the apps, you need to come to the realization that you may have to go out with 10-20 different people before finding someone you really want to see a second time. It may turn, in part, on what you're willing to deal with. I also think it helps to start from the perspective that you have some baggage. I think that is also true for non-divorced folk, but they can more easily pretend they don't. As a divorced women with a kid, there's no denying it. It's wonderful baggage, because kids are wonderful, but it will limit your options and potential mates. And it's fine if you understand that, but you'll likely drive yourself bonkers if you don't.
I hope this helps, and good luck.
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