DW is envious of relationship with newborn DS

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd be creeped out if my spouse was jealous of the primary parent relationship with a newborn or infant.

The primary caregiver is reasonably closer to a baby.

Are you a lesbian mom?

Forget "are you a lesbian mom?" I'm wondering if that poster is a parent at all. The notion of jealousy of the primary caregiver is well-known to both straight dads as well as lesbian moms. Intellectually folks know that the baby is closer to the primary caregiver. Emotionally, however, it's a different ball of wax. It's perfectly normal (not creepy) for one parent to feel jealous of the primary caregiver.

And most families go through a period where the child prefers one parent over the other in the toddler and/or early childhood years as well. Sometimes its the "primary" caregiver, but sometimes its the not - and it can be difficult for the parent who is not the "favorite" at that moment. It's common, and its hard. Sometimes it even flip flops a few times and a child will prefer one parent over the other, and then prefer the other parent for a while. It's exhausting for the preferred parent, and can be hurtful to the parent who is not preferred in the moment, but the child is not doing it to be hurtful - they are too young.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd be creeped out if my spouse was jealous of the primary parent relationship with a newborn or infant.

The primary caregiver is reasonably closer to a baby.

Are you a lesbian mom?

Forget "are you a lesbian mom?" I'm wondering if that poster is a parent at all. The notion of jealousy of the primary caregiver is well-known to both straight dads as well as lesbian moms. Intellectually folks know that the baby is closer to the primary caregiver. Emotionally, however, it's a different ball of wax. It's perfectly normal (not creepy) for one parent to feel jealous of the primary caregiver.

And most families go through a period where the child prefers one parent over the other in the toddler and/or early childhood years as well. Sometimes its the "primary" caregiver, but sometimes its the not - and it can be difficult for the parent who is not the "favorite" at that moment. It's common, and its hard. Sometimes it even flip flops a few times and a child will prefer one parent over the other, and then prefer the other parent for a while. It's exhausting for the preferred parent, and can be hurtful to the parent who is not preferred in the moment, but the child is not doing it to be hurtful - they are too young.

That's where being an adult comes in. You make it sound like a never ending round of jealousy and resentments based on who an infant or toddler prefers.
Adults, intelligent adults, no matter their sexuality or gender should be aware and not get pissy because their child is going through normal development.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd be creeped out if my spouse was jealous of the primary parent relationship with a newborn or infant.

The primary caregiver is reasonably closer to a baby.

Are you a lesbian mom?

Forget "are you a lesbian mom?" I'm wondering if that poster is a parent at all. The notion of jealousy of the primary caregiver is well-known to both straight dads as well as lesbian moms. Intellectually folks know that the baby is closer to the primary caregiver. Emotionally, however, it's a different ball of wax. It's perfectly normal (not creepy) for one parent to feel jealous of the primary caregiver.

And most families go through a period where the child prefers one parent over the other in the toddler and/or early childhood years as well. Sometimes its the "primary" caregiver, but sometimes its the not - and it can be difficult for the parent who is not the "favorite" at that moment. It's common, and its hard. Sometimes it even flip flops a few times and a child will prefer one parent over the other, and then prefer the other parent for a while. It's exhausting for the preferred parent, and can be hurtful to the parent who is not preferred in the moment, but the child is not doing it to be hurtful - they are too young.

That's where being an adult comes in. You make it sound like a never ending round of jealousy and resentments based on who an infant or toddler prefers.
Adults, intelligent adults, no matter their sexuality or gender should be aware and not get pissy because their child is going through normal development.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd be creeped out if my spouse was jealous of the primary parent relationship with a newborn or infant.

The primary caregiver is reasonably closer to a baby.

Are you a lesbian mom?

How are lesbian moms different from "normal" moms?

Hey, a-hole, the whole point of a separate forum is so we don't have to explain ourselves to straight people. But if you can't see how a woman who didn't give birth isn't the same as a man who didn't give birth, well, I don't have any help for you because you're clearly an idiot.

[Anonymous]

OP, I'm not a lesbian- but wanted to let you know that this is totally normal. DH felt that way for about the first 6 months, and then when DD was showing more of her personality,etc he regained his spot in her life, so to speak. I think pumping and giving occasional bottles is a good idea, skin to skin, etc.

Now DD us just totally obsessed with DH! And he begged for DC2, even though we still laugh that he really won't be too involved tor the first 6months or so.

Good luck!