If you had a young family when you left the Catholic faith...

[Anonymous]

I'm married to an Episcopalean, and he also sits dutifully by us when we go to church (about every other week).

OP, I think your DH also agreed to raise your kids Catholic. Therefore, I think it's fair to have your young one get First Communion "to match" the siblings, and for Confirmation, well, you could let your kid decide that one.

I'd like to say that there are three distinctions to be made: first, the Catholic Church in Rome, which has stuff going on that one may or may not like, but that's not really part of your daily life. Then there is the local church, which you are now trying to work through to find a good fit.

There is also the Archdioscese issue. I'm in Los Angeles now, but was in NoVA, and WOW there is a bit of a difference, and I could see how your DH could be wigged out.

So I want to add here that if you let your DH know that not all parishes are like the ones you've been at, and you are still looking for the right fit, but in the meantime, want to finish out those sacraments, hopefully he'll understand.

[Anonymous]

OP, you didn't detail what the issues are for your husband. Is he christian at all or something else? Others have suggested Methodist, Espiscopal, Presbyterian. Basically Catholic- Lite. Depending on what he objected to, he may be no happier with Catholic Lite than with Catholic. Quaker is nice, it is like the Catholic contenplatives but without the ritualized prayer. Just don't raise the kids in a Catholic bashing community. If he was raised Baptist, that very well might his perspective going back to his Childhood.

[Anonymous]

I was raised Catholic - 19 years of Catholic school - and the vast majority of my experience was really positive and I'm eternally grateful for some of the most amazing women I have ever met, who happened to be Catholic nuns.
Married an agnostic who will generally go along with whatever I want as far as the kids religion is concerned. He occasionally joins us at church, always goes to the big holidays, and is as supportive as one can be without actually believing.

My son is now in second grade. He did CCD last year and I assumed he would receive first communion this year and was just sort of mindlessly following along. Then a few things happened that made me really unhappy/uncomfortable with raising my kids Catholic. So last year for lent, we went to a different denomonation each week and also learned a little more about other Christian faiths.
We are now extremely happy at our local Episcopalian church. Because they don't do a big thing for first communion, I had my kids (the second grader and the 4 year old) wait and did a little bit of mini-education for them about communion and then they received for the first time at Easter this year.

I'm not suggesting that the Episcopal church is right for you, just encouraging you to not feel forced into a set timeline just because that's "how it's always done" There is nothing wrong with pausing on the sacraments. Your second grader can recieve first communion in 3rd or 4th if that's what ends up happening. And confirmation is something that shouldn't ever have a set timeline.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was raised Catholic - 19 years of Catholic school - and the vast majority of my experience was really positive and I'm eternally grateful for some of the most amazing women I have ever met, who happened to be Catholic nuns.
Married an agnostic who will generally go along with whatever I want as far as the kids religion is concerned. He occasionally joins us at church, always goes to the big holidays, and is as supportive as one can be without actually believing.

My son is now in second grade. He did CCD last year and I assumed he would receive first communion this year and was just sort of mindlessly following along. Then a few things happened that made me really unhappy/uncomfortable with raising my kids Catholic. So last year for lent, we went to a different denomonation each week and also learned a little more about other Christian faiths.
We are now extremely happy at our local Episcopalian church. Because they don't do a big thing for first communion, I had my kids (the second grader and the 4 year old) wait and did a little bit of mini-education for them about communion and then they received for the first time at Easter this year.

I'm not suggesting that the Episcopal church is right for you, just encouraging you to not feel forced into a set timeline just because that's "how it's always done" There is nothing wrong with pausing on the sacraments. Your second grader can recieve first communion in 3rd or 4th if that's what ends up happening. And confirmation is something that shouldn't ever have a set timeline.

Excellent commentary and advice, well stated.