Piano lessons, let my DS or not?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:At this level - he knows how to play the piano

Yup. He knows how to play. The only thing in your power right now is to make him hate it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At this level it is so much more than playing the notes correctly. If the teacher is working on refining his quality of sound and working on various interpretation skills making him repeat the same phrase over and over again, it is understandable that he may not want to get into the details.
The Etude you mentioned is not particularly difficult. He is probably seeing others his own age playing half of the etudes from OPUS 10 and 25. To have phenomenal technique he should have played OP 10 # 1,2,4,5,12 as well as OP 25 # 5,8,11,12 with adequate tempo, light touch, good interpretation and clear pedaling.

Who cares about his technique or what etude he played. he is tired of playing piano and wants to do other things. His actual skill is pretty irrelevant.

I think her point was that he is good, but not so good this will be anything more than a hobby. A bit of perspective about good versus great wasn't so bad to read.

[Anonymous]

I tell my kids music is good for the brain and I see it more as an exercise, like yoga for the body. I don't expect them to become great musicians but I do want them to practice albeit two or three times a week. I told them that I expect them to continue with violin until senior year of high school. If it drops down to playing once a week it's fine with me but I don't want them to drop it altogether.

[Anonymous]

He will regret it. Take it from a child prodigy who attended Manhattan School of Music prep program for years.

[Anonymous]

I think he will regret it, too. Also, playing at this level will help your son with college applications. I suspect PPs who are saying to let him quit don't understand the level he has achieved. Is he doing a lot of national or even state-wide competitons? Maybe you could let him dial down on those for a year. Is he tired of his current teacher? There are a good two dozen teachers in the DMV who can handle these types of kids. Explore ways to change it up, but don't let him quit.

[Anonymous]

I definitely regret quitting. I had a lot of ability but it's almost all gone now, and find it very frustrating when I try to pick it up again. While I don't think you can really force him to play, do you let him play different styles of music? I always enjoyed playing in small groups, but wasn't allowed to play anything but classical- maybe he would enjoy a small jazz ensemble or something like that? Even some rock bands need pianists.

[Anonymous]

I don't see how you could forget how to play the piano. I've been playing for almost 40 years, and there was a time when years went by without my being able to play because of work. It doesn't leave you if you really know what you are doing. When I was finally able to play again, as soon as my fingers touched the keys my soul knew what to do. I don't even need music. It's inside of me. If he wants to play later on, he'll play. If not, he won't. It's as simple as that. You can't force feeling.

[Anonymous]

I am the PP whose DS takes the piano class at school. One thing I did not mention is that we also changed teachers right around that time due to the fact that his former teacher was not able to accommodate our schedule. The new teacher comes to the house. He is much more low key (mainly because DS is low key). He works with the personality and pace of the student and lacks the rigidity of our first teacher. But he is also an excellent teacher that demands perfection...but does it in a gentle way with a sense of humor. This works with my DS and my DD. My DD couldn't even work with the first teacher at all. So maybe a new teacher could make a difference and perhaps you should try that before you allow him to quit.

[Anonymous]

My DD is also very good at piano. At the age of 9, she won International competition and performed at Carnegie Hall. Now at 13, she is a bit tired of practicing piano. It takes lot of time and commitment. As she get older, she likes to try new things and lot of distractions. I let her quit if she wants to quit. Every time, she says she want to quit. She goes back to her piano. Now she spends time playing pop music when she gets tired of classical music.

[Anonymous]

I would NOT let him quit. Realistically how much time are we talking about that he would "save"? I would look into switching teachers as a way to buy another year. I would not let my child quit until he or she is done with HIgh School. Sorry, it is not that much time really (my kids practice 30 minutes a day 5 times a week) and it is part of their education.

[Anonymous]

My 15 year old is also a talented piano player but he wouldn't ever play that etude you mentioned - he plays what he enjoys. Currently, my son is not taking lessons. He still plays piano every day and does seriously love it. But, I wouldn't force him and I know he will go back to lessons or performing piano - it's his skill and he is old enough to decide.

I have a friend and she has told me her daughter is quite talented at piano - competitions, difficult pieces, etc. And the mom required the girl to practice an hour a day, so she got very good. The daughter begged to quit and now has literally not played piano at all in the one year she quit.

This makes no sense to me at all and probably means her child never really liked piano in the first place. My son, while maybe not technically as gifted as this girl, will be playing piano his whole life. Which do you prefer?

[Anonymous]

Your son may or may not regret quitting. But he is well into the age where it should be his choice. 15 is too old to be having such personal decisions controlled by the parents.

I agree with PP that the only thing you can achieve is to make him hate it (and you, possibly).