To make anyone being too lenient re screen time feel good

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids are just 14 months apart and at maybe 3-4 we did a lot of screen time. I'd say 2-3 hours per day and I felt awful about it. My older has special needs, my kids are 15 mod apart, and dealing and his sibling was all encompassing and tiring. Now kids are and 5 and they play from
Sun up to sunset. No mention of screens. I think letting go more and being more free actually helped.

Thank you for this post. I needed it today! This being DCUM, of course some holier-than-thou parent had to respond asap, but what can you do.

OP here - I was just trying to lessen some of our collective guilt! Most of the moms I know IRL did screen time from 2-4 for sibling issues, and most felt guilty. I was convinced I was never going to be able to turn off the TV.

FWIW, my son was premature and has delays. He has ADHD but its not clear if that is kind of like a product of being a preemie or what, exactly. It was diagnosed very early because it is so severe so it is certainly not due to screens. He had a receptive language delay, meaning it was hard for him to understand what people were saying. It was very scary. But he is a strong visual learner, and TV actually helped him learn to understand language - seeing situations and hearing what they were seemed to really resonate with him. He is now in normal range for language at 5. I find that he is much more reactive and it is difficult to transition him away from an IPad - I think because we don't have one and it is tangible.

There are some things we should feel a little guilty about, OP. Screen time before two, junk food, losing our tempers, etc. You have no idea how much better off your child would have been without it. I am not trying to be a bitch here but advocating for screen time is in no child's best interest regardless of the break it gives us.

Ridiculous. Reasonable screen time is fine; OP's point is that her kids are fine. At a certain point trying to perfect your kid and your parenting and do everything by the book is actually more harmful than being flexible and having a reasonably happy family and reasonable expectations. OP is not advocating for screen time, but rather advocating for being optimistic and giving yourself a break for not being perfect. Which is a great lesson for kids to learn.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Studies show that ADHD and screen time are linked, but they do not show causality.

NO here and it would be unethical to ever run a study to prove causality. Imagine telling the mother of identical twins that you need one baby to watch TV while the other doesn't to prove that the baby who does watch TV gets ADD.

Screen time in children under two has been linked to a number of learning and behavioral problems. Do it, don't do it - but don't make up excuses for it.

You know what obsessively following APA recommendations (which are not really based on evidence and change frequently anyway) is linked to? Anxiety, rigidity, and an unhappy home life.

Watch Daniel Tiger. Eat a few cookies. Have fun. There is a middle way.

[Anonymous]

Even APA is no longer recommending no screen before two.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Studies show that ADHD and screen time are linked, but they do not show causality.

NO here and it would be unethical to ever run a study to prove causality. Imagine telling the mother of identical twins that you need one baby to watch TV while the other doesn't to prove that the baby who does watch TV gets ADD.

Screen time in children under two has been linked to a number of learning and behavioral problems. Do it, don't do it - but don't make up excuses for it.

You know what obsessively following APA recommendations (which are not really based on evidence and change frequently anyway) is linked to? Anxiety, rigidity, and an unhappy home life.

Watch Daniel Tiger. Eat a few cookies. Have fun. There is a middle way.

The AAP has been wrong on a lot of things and are still wrong on a number more (e.g., recommending RF until 2 vs until 4, which is best practices in the countries with the lowest child traffic death rates, barely recommending food exposure vs wide exposure, which is the default in countries with much lower rates of food allergies like in France). Just because they caved and said media was fine before 2 doesn't mean they're correct; it just means they changed their minds again (and are likely still wrong).

We allowed media before 2, but not because of whatever latest bit of nonsense the AAP pulled out of a hat. We did it based on our understanding of child development and on what made the most sense for our family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids are just 14 months apart and at maybe 3-4 we did a lot of screen time. I'd say 2-3 hours per day and I felt awful about it. My older has special needs, my kids are 15 mod apart, and dealing and his sibling was all encompassing and tiring. Now kids are and 5 and they play from
Sun up to sunset. No mention of screens. I think letting go more and being more free actually helped.

Thank you for this post. I needed it today! This being DCUM, of course some holier-than-thou parent had to respond asap, but what can you do.

OP here - I was just trying to lessen some of our collective guilt! Most of the moms I know IRL did screen time from 2-4 for sibling issues, and most felt guilty. I was convinced I was never going to be able to turn off the TV.

FWIW, my son was premature and has delays. He has ADHD but its not clear if that is kind of like a product of being a preemie or what, exactly. It was diagnosed very early because it is so severe so it is certainly not due to screens. He had a receptive language delay, meaning it was hard for him to understand what people were saying. It was very scary. But he is a strong visual learner, and TV actually helped him learn to understand language - seeing situations and hearing what they were seemed to really resonate with him. He is now in normal range for language at 5. I find that he is much more reactive and it is difficult to transition him away from an IPad - I think because we don't have one and it is tangible.

There are some things we should feel a little guilty about, OP. Screen time before two, junk food, losing our tempers, etc. You have no idea how much better off your child would have been without it. I am not trying to be a bitch here but advocating for screen time is in no child's best interest regardless of the break it gives us.

OP is not advocating for screen time...she's advocating for not feeling guilty that your kid is getting too much.

Big difference.

[Anonymous]

My bigger concern with that much screen time is myopia. I think research has shown that being indoors staring at screens is part of the reason myopia rates are rising exponentially.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My bigger concern with that much screen time is myopia. I think research has shown that being indoors staring at screens is part of the reason myopia rates are rising exponentially.

The research suggests it's almost exclusively the indoor time; what the kids are doing in there doesn't matter, because the lack of strong outdoor light is the problem.

[ThomK]

Hi -

This is a great thread. If you haven't seen http://www.screenagersmovie.com/ it's worth screening.

Also - here's a ton of articles on our blog http://treehouseeyes.com/the-myopia-blog/ several of which recap and link to studies re the linkage between too much screentime and the myopia epidemic.

Thanks.

Thom
[e-mail]

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Similar story! DS got a ton of screentime from 2-4 (and I don't even have the excuse of a baby sib). Now at 4 he watches a movie or two on the weekend and that's it. It's really no big deal.

I think this is entirely dependent on the preferences and temperament of the kid. I have one twin who is obsessed with screens - TV, ipad, leap pad, anything with a screen. The other could take it or leave it. They've both had the same restrictions and permissions their whole lives.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The correlation between screen time and ADD is convincing. I am glad it seems to have worked out for you but it is not anything I would ever recommend a parent do to cope with children.

Please share your research with us. I have never heard this.

Your head must be shoved deep in that sand because I've "heard" about this countless places for many years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Even APA is no longer recommending no screen before two.

Yes, and they changed it not because it was in the best interest of the child to allow screen time before two, but to make recommendations consistent with how often people actually use screens.

[Anonymous]

Personally, I think ADHD causes screen time. I mean, have you ever tried to get a moment of peace at home with an ADHD kid? Particularly if they are also extroverted and chatty? Screen time is awesome.

[Anonymous]

Nothing to feel bad about. Video games make you smarter. Shorter reaction time, larger working memory capacity, better hand-eye coordination. Tons of studies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My bigger concern with that much screen time is myopia. I think research has shown that being indoors staring at screens is part of the reason myopia rates are rising exponentially.

So will screens help my kid's hyperopia?

[Anonymous]

ThomK wrote:Hi -

This is a great thread. If you haven't seen http://www.screenagersmovie.com/ it's worth screening.

Also - here's a ton of articles on our blog http://treehouseeyes.com/the-myopia-blog/ several of which recap and link to studies re the linkage between too much screentime and the myopia epidemic.

Thanks.

Thom
[e-mail]

That's funny. I am old and thought my myopia came from being a bookworm. My husband reads even more than I do. Perfect vision.