Short-term nanny or start daycare right away after maternity leave?

[Anonymous]

You always need to have back up care. Occasionally you need to BE the back up care. even though you are only the parent, oddly enough it will be your job sometimes to care for your child. With only one set of eyes no less.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You always need to have back up care. Occasionally you need to BE the back up care. even though you are only the parent, oddly enough it will be your job sometimes to care for your child. With only one set of eyes no less.

Why do people like this even read the daycare forum? And do you honestly think working parents don't care for their own children? You know the average work day is only about 8-10 hours out of 24, right?

[Anonymous]

I think waiting until your child is older and has a more developed immune system is wise. And often it's hard to perfectly time when an infant spot will open up so you might need a nanny anyway

[Anonymous]

I'm the PP whose kid had RSV. It was absolutely horrible. She completely missed her second week of day care (although it still cost us $500) and I missed my second week of work. She had a fever of 104, went to the pediatrician 3x that week, and very nearly went to the ER. She couldn't sleep, hardly ate, and lost tons of weight that took her 2 months to make up. She went from being in the 75% percentile for weight to below the 50th. The worst part was that she had us up all night with a choking cough for 7 days. It was extremely frightening to have her sick at such a young age (17 weeks) and I blamed myself completely for putting her in an infant room and not getting a nanny until she was a little older.

The other thing that was very hard for her and us was adjusting to the fact that she was used to getting so much more individual attention when at home with me. At day care their ratio is 1:3 and sometimes 1:4 so she spent lots of time just sitting in a chair or laying on the floor with very little stimulation and caregiver interaction. It was not good for her development and I absolutely agree with the previous poster who suggested holding off until baby is 6 months old to put them in care. They are a lot bigger and less vulnerable as they can usually roll and sit up by then and are more interested in their environment and in other children.

If we have another baby I will absolutely hold off putting them in a group daycare setting until they are 6 months. Transitioning to care at that age is not any more difficult than at 4 months as the attachment and clinginess to their primary caregivers is still a ways off.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm the PP whose kid had RSV. It was absolutely horrible. She completely missed her second week of day care (although it still cost us $500) and I missed my second week of work. She had a fever of 104, went to the pediatrician 3x that week, and very nearly went to the ER. She couldn't sleep, hardly ate, and lost tons of weight that took her 2 months to make up. She went from being in the 75% percentile for weight to below the 50th. The worst part was that she had us up all night with a choking cough for 7 days. It was extremely frightening to have her sick at such a young age (17 weeks) and I blamed myself completely for putting her in an infant room and not getting a nanny until she was a little older.

The other thing that was very hard for her and us was adjusting to the fact that she was used to getting so much more individual attention when at home with me. At day care their ratio is 1:3 and sometimes 1:4 so she spent lots of time just sitting in a chair or laying on the floor with very little stimulation and caregiver interaction. It was not good for her development and I absolutely agree with the previous poster who suggested holding off until baby is 6 months old to put them in care. They are a lot bigger and less vulnerable as they can usually roll and sit up by then and are more interested in their environment and in other children.

If we have another baby I will absolutely hold off putting them in a group daycare setting until they are 6 months. Transitioning to care at that age is not any more difficult than at 4 months as the attachment and clinginess to their primary caregivers is still a ways off.

You do realize that an older sibling in daycare is more of a threat than an infant room? The older sibling is already exposed to all the germs and unless you keep the baby in a bubble the older sibling will be most likely touching/breathing on baby.

-mother of baby number 3 who will be going back to work next week after 3 mos maternity leave

[Anonymous]

It just sounds like a good way to blow cash without much benefit.

Your older child is going to be a big source of germs, and with that child still going to daycare, that doesn't help a ton.

[Anonymous]

I would get a nanny for a few months, without a doubt.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm the PP whose kid had RSV. It was absolutely horrible. She completely missed her second week of day care (although it still cost us $500) and I missed my second week of work. She had a fever of 104, went to the pediatrician 3x that week, and very nearly went to the ER. She couldn't sleep, hardly ate, and lost tons of weight that took her 2 months to make up. She went from being in the 75% percentile for weight to below the 50th. The worst part was that she had us up all night with a choking cough for 7 days. It was extremely frightening to have her sick at such a young age (17 weeks) and I blamed myself completely for putting her in an infant room and not getting a nanny until she was a little older.

The other thing that was very hard for her and us was adjusting to the fact that she was used to getting so much more individual attention when at home with me. At day care their ratio is 1:3 and sometimes 1:4 so she spent lots of time just sitting in a chair or laying on the floor with very little stimulation and caregiver interaction. It was not good for her development and I absolutely agree with the previous poster who suggested holding off until baby is 6 months old to put them in care. They are a lot bigger and less vulnerable as they can usually roll and sit up by then and are more interested in their environment and in other children.

If we have another baby I will absolutely hold off putting them in a group daycare setting until they are 6 months. Transitioning to care at that age is not any more difficult than at 4 months as the attachment and clinginess to their primary caregivers is still a ways off.

4 months or 6 months, your child could still get sick with rsv. Most children tend to get sick as soon as thy start daycare, no matter the age, as they are being introduced to germs that they never been exposed to

[Anonymous]

We used daycare with my oldest and an Au Pair with the youngest. The nanny/Au Pair route is a thousand times better for a baby. One on one attention, no shuffling in cars, and they get to sleep in the comfort of their own home.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thank you for all the replies. My biggest takeaway here is that a short-term nanny involves a lot of upfront work and start-up time, which will be difficult while my husband and I are newly juggling two kids, sleep deprivation, and two full-time jobs, I do worry about the new baby getting sick a lot though. Our first child certainly got his share of illnesses right after starting daycare, and I know to expect even more with kiddo number 2 since he or she will also be exposed to my son's germs.

Lots to think about. Leaning toward just starting the baby in daycare right after my maternity leave.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm the PP whose kid had RSV. It was absolutely horrible. She completely missed her second week of day care (although it still cost us $500) and I missed my second week of work. She had a fever of 104, went to the pediatrician 3x that week, and very nearly went to the ER. She couldn't sleep, hardly ate, and lost tons of weight that took her 2 months to make up. She went from being in the 75% percentile for weight to below the 50th. The worst part was that she had us up all night with a choking cough for 7 days. It was extremely frightening to have her sick at such a young age (17 weeks) and I blamed myself completely for putting her in an infant room and not getting a nanny until she was a little older.

The other thing that was very hard for her and us was adjusting to the fact that she was used to getting so much more individual attention when at home with me. At day care their ratio is 1:3 and sometimes 1:4 so she spent lots of time just sitting in a chair or laying on the floor with very little stimulation and caregiver interaction. It was not good for her development and I absolutely agree with the previous poster who suggested holding off until baby is 6 months old to put them in care. They are a lot bigger and less vulnerable as they can usually roll and sit up by then and are more interested in their environment and in other children.

If we have another baby I will absolutely hold off putting them in a group daycare setting until they are 6 months. Transitioning to care at that age is not any more difficult than at 4 months as the attachment and clinginess to their primary caregivers is still a ways off.

4 months or 6 months, your child could still get sick with rsv. Most children tend to get sick as soon as thy start daycare, no matter the age, as they are being introduced to germs that they never been exposed to

I'm the OP. Yes, I understand that. But 4 months and 6 months are hugely different in terms of age and development. A fever as high as she had a few weeks earlier would have required a spinal tap.