Mother's love vs Father's love

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Every "love" is different. This would be an uncomfortable question for gay parents or single parents.

Q
I think lucky kids who get two moms. Dads love their kids but I'm not sure it's the same fierce protective unquestioned and unconditional love as mothers.

I agree with you that the love is different, but I recall when our child was a baby, my DH telling his childless friend about his feelings as a parent, "My wife is someone I'd die for. But my kid is someone I'd kill for."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think men love their children, but not as intensely, or in the same way, that mothers love their children.

Also, a father's love diminishes if the mother dies. He will look for a new woman upon whom to focus his love, and if she has children, he will love them as an extension of her. I learned this the hard way. And saw it in others' experiences. There is a reason more men than women have trouble maintaining relationships with kids after a divorce or death of the other parent.

This has been my experience, too. I watched my divorced brother find a new girlfriend, and woo her sons to gain their love, because he wanted the woman's love. And he all but ditched his own son. They are estranged now.

I don't know why this is. I hope that perhaps we are raising boys today to be different. My son talks a lot about being a dad. And he loves little kids. And generally is way more open about family affection and love than I ever remember my brother being at the same age.

Again, there are always exceptions. But I'd like think we see less of this abandonment in each new generation.

[Anonymous]

I think women love their children in a more primal way. They love them instinctively and men fall in love with the kids as they rear them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think men love their children, but not as intensely, or in the same way, that mothers love their children.

Also, a father's love diminishes if the mother dies. He will look for a new woman upon whom to focus his love, and if she has children, he will love them as an extension of her. I learned this the hard way. And saw it in others' experiences. There is a reason more men than women have trouble maintaining relationships with kids after a divorce or death of the other parent.

This has been my experience, too. I watched my divorced brother find a new girlfriend, and woo her sons to gain their love, because he wanted the woman's love. And he all but ditched his own son. They are estranged now.

I don't know why this is. I hope that perhaps we are raising boys today to be different. My son talks a lot about being a dad. And he loves little kids. And generally is way more open about family affection and love than I ever remember my brother being at the same age.

Again, there are always exceptions. But I'd like think we see less of this abandonment in each new generation.

Sex. It's really simple, unfortunately.

[Anonymous]

Miss driest thread is misandrist.

[Anonymous]

I am not a SAHM and DH is very loving and involved, shares all parenting duties. But if the child is sick or hurt or frustrated or waking up from a nap, she always wants Mommy (she's almost 4). I don't know why this is. Maybe because I come to her during her middle of the night crying or stay home with her when sick.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Miss driest thread is misandrist.

+1. Today I learned that men just don't love their kids as much as women do, and that they're simply interested in fornicating with more women and using their children to reach them once their women die.

As someone said in a different thread...with these kinds of attitudes toward men, it's little wonder so many of you have marital issues.

[Anonymous]

Now that we've talked about how inferior fathers are to mothers, maybe we can next start a thread about Caucasian love vs. African-American love.

[Anonymous]

I think a lot of the differences are due to cultural practices. More recent generations are raising boys to be a lot more nurturing than in the past, when there were more rigid gender-based parenting norms.

My husband absolutely adores our young child. He was the one who babysat and watched younger relatives at family events, and his favorite age is actually 2-4 (our kid is recently out of that range). He really wanted to be a parent and has co-parented equally (and if I'm honest, has sometimes done more of the work of parenting) since day 1. However, he also works with sick/injured kids everyday so I think he's just really thankful and appreciative that we have a healthy, happy kid.