DS's word against teacher's - WWYD?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In MCPS there is a due date and a deadline. After the deadline Zs aren't changed. Your DC should be handing things in by the due date, not putting things off until the deadline. Could that be happening?

OP again.

Sorry, I was using the word deadline when I meant due date! DS always hands in his work before or on the due date.

After the teacher and my son hunted for the homework for two weeks, she said she could not accept a make-up or change the grade, and that's probably because the deadline had passed - I surmise, since I was not aware there was this difference between the due date and the deadline.

Thank you for explaining, PP! I will confirm this with the teacher, and ask her to post the deadlines too, because they cannot be seen on Edline right now. That way, since she has a history of posting Zs all over the place, DS and I will know to request make-ups or a grade change before the deadline has passed. I will also get DS's homeroom and special ed teacher involved. I don't like the way this Z-giving teacher is operating.

[Anonymous]

Last year my DD's science teacher kept losing her homework. Only hers. DD SWORE she was turning it in. And the teacher liked her.

What we came up with was for DD to find her own words to say "Ms. Berkman, do you think it would help you if I collected the homework each day at the beginning of class while you're taking attendance and then put a big clip on it and put it in your bag for you?" And then DD put hers on top every single time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In MCPS there is a due date and a deadline. After the deadline Zs aren't changed. Your DC should be handing things in by the due date, not putting things off until the deadline. Could that be happening?

This is what our MCPS middle school teachers explained to us. Make sure he is clear on the due date (the best time to turn it in) versus the deadline (the absolute last moment to turn it in for credit).

[Anonymous]

Generally if there is a Z that means that homework can still be submitted, maybe not for a full A. Did he ask to redo it? There is no unfairness that I can see. My DD is always saying she submitted, and then she find it out in the mess of her backpack.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

OP here.

It's messed up.

He's gotten a couple of Zs (zeros for not handing in work) in this class on Sunday nights or Monday mornings for deadlines due that Monday (class is in 3rd period). He checks Edline in second period, because it's his SN resource class, finds out he has a Z, hands in his work *on time* in 3rd period and asks for the Z to be removed. Crazy, right?

That time, the Z got put in right before he left for MCPS's Outdoor Ed, and I thought he would talk to the teacher upon his return, meaning the week after (3 days of camp plus the weekend). So they both of them looked up and down for that paper, it took a couple of weeks, then the work got graded and returned to the class so the teacher said he couldn't make it up anymore.

Today DS suggested to the teacher that he do extra work to make up for the Z, but *the teacher refused*.

PPs who asked about the letter change, you are right that he will probably go back up to an A for the quarter. Right now he's at a high B, and has As for the rest of his work in that class.

But still! I admit I'm fixated on the unfairness of it, and that it's probably immature of me. That kid has worked so hard to get to where he is right now.

Do you have a common last name? Just checking, because we have a common last name that another kid had in the class, and THREE teachers confused FIVE classes of grades. The only reason I figured it out is because the grades the other kid got were so different than my kid's, I kept watching and telling her to go talk to the teacher. Finally one teacher wrote in the note box, "Larlo, this project was due last Thursday..." and I realized, OMG they are confusing my kid with Larlo. Had that teacher not done that, I wouldn't have figured it out.

In case you think it's just one school, it was not, the following year we were in a different school and sure enough, a teacher's comments said, "Larla, you...".

And btw CVS and Rite Aid have given me someone else's drugs a few times. Scary!

So even if your surname is not common, check to see if there are other kids in the class with the same or similar FIRST name!

[Anonymous]

My son, 12 at the time, had a similar incident. Aldo a straight A student. At his school, Kids are encouraged to advocate for themselves and parents are discouraged from interfering. Son told teacher he'd handed in the homework and teacher told him that he NEVER lost homework. He was quite harsh with son. Son spoke to his Advisor who also approached teacher who told her the same thing.
About 3 weeks later with a zero still on his record on homework my son assured me he'd handed in, I wrote to the Dean. Before the end of the same day the teacher suddenly "found" the homework and apologized to my son. I'm positive that the teacher would never have admitted to having the homework had I not intervened and escalated.

[Anonymous]

Op, I understand your frustration but I think you need to relax. It's 6th grade. Colleges aren't going to care if he got a B in 6th grade. I have a child with ADHD/anxiety and every time she got overly stressed in middle school, I explained that this was the time to learn from her mistakes. It takes time to get those executive functioning skills but I didn't pressure her and truly didn't stress over her middle school grades. She has pulled herself together as a freshman and is rocking it. She knows that it counts now. Of course, I help her when she needs help but by letting her make mistakes when the consequences were low, she is a great self-advocate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

My son does not have a phone, otherwise I would ask him to take a pic![u]

Then take a picture of his completed work with YOUR cell phone.

It may not be taken inside the classroom, but it will be time stamped & at the very least the teacher will be able to see that not only the assignment WAS actually completed, but he can see that it was completed by the deadline. Then all the teacher has to do is print out your photo &now he's got a copy of his homework.

I think a lot of the time the teachers aren't sure whether to believe the child, that the assignment was actually completed. The picture is proof that it was.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op, I understand your frustration but I think you need to relax. It's 6th grade. Colleges aren't going to care if he got a B in 6th grade. I have a child with ADHD/anxiety and every time she got overly stressed in middle school, I explained that this was the time to learn from her mistakes. It takes time to get those executive functioning skills but I didn't pressure her and truly didn't stress over her middle school grades. She has pulled herself together as a freshman and is rocking it. She knows that it counts now. Of course, I help her when she needs help but by letting her make mistakes when the consequences were low, she is a great self-advocate.

OP here.

I would absolutely do it your way if I thought he had made a mistake.
He alerted the teacher as soon as he could, reminded her every couple of days of the situation and whether anything could be done about it, until she told him 2 weeks later the grade could not be changed.
So I am stepping in, and if the teacher has no alternate plan than to keep the grade, move up the chain, courteously.

I see this more as a practice run for dealing with grade snafus in high school rather than arguing with this teacher for the sake of arguing. And I would never seek to get my children a grade they have not earned.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: "since she has a history of posting Zs all over the place"

"I don't like the way this Z-giving teacher is operating".

You don't really believe this about the teacher, do you OP?

If this teacher truly has a "history of posting Zs all over the place" surely the principal & all of the parents would be well aware, right?

I mean, you don't develop a reputation as harsh as the one you just described from just one kid (especially when that kid has only been in her class for a measly 3 months). Nah, to have such a reputation she must be throwing out Z's left & right, back & forth to every single student she's ever taught, right?? Have you tried comparing horror stories with all of her previous victims??
Oh wait, I'm not talking about the supposed students who came before your son that were also victimized by this excessive & abusive "posting of Z's all over the place", No, I'm actually wondering if there were other butt-hurt parents who came before you, that too threw a bigger tantrum about the Z than their kid did?? No??

It sounds as if you may be exaggerating just a bit due to some frustration or possibly just because you didn't get your way? Because if this teacher truly "has a history of posting Zs all over the place" (in your son's mere 3 months as her student), I imagine you've filled a formal complaint & attached the crushing evidence to the principal, right?

Guess what snowflake? This isn't Elementary school anymore, it's Middle school. It is NOT the teachers job to chase down one freaking assignment for 2 whole weeks.. that's YOUR kids job! That teacher probably has 25+ other kids in that class to focus on too, she doesn't have time to kowtow around with your son for 2 weeks looking for ONE assignment. Are you crazy?? That is absolutely absurd.

Silly question... when your son couldn't find the assignment after the first week, why on God's green earth did he not just complete the assignment again??

Wait, wait don't answer that... I have a feeling I know the reason why (and I'm guessing it probably has something to do with dear old mom, a bit too much pride & not enough maturity (your word, not mine).

Yes, it definitely sucks having to complete an assignment he already did again, especially if he truly handed it in & the teacher lost it. It's not fair, no question about it. But guess what, buttercup??
Life's not fair! Life can sucks sometimes and it definitely won't always be fair, but that's when you just have to suck it up, accept the fact that it is what it is & do it again! Then, you're supposed to actually put it behind you & move on, NOT dwell over something that CAN'T be changed (a novel idea, I know). He may not like having to do an assignment twice, but at least he won't have to worry about getting a Z for that assignment. Completing the assignment again would have taught him about a good work ethic & that helps to build a solid character... but still bitching about it weeks later when nothing can be done to change it? Not so much. If you want to be mad at anybody, you should take a long look in the mirror, because YOU should have told him to just get it over with & do it again, period.

Set a better example mom, just move on.

[Anonymous]

1:01 nailed it. May be harsh, but all truth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: "since she has a history of posting Zs all over the place"

"I don't like the way this Z-giving teacher is operating".

You don't really believe this about the teacher, do you OP?

If this teacher truly has a "history of posting Zs all over the place" surely the principal & all of the parents would be well aware, right?

I mean, you don't develop a reputation as harsh as the one you just described from just one kid (especially when that kid has only been in her class for a measly 3 months). Nah, to have such a reputation she must be throwing out Z's left & right, back & forth to every single student she's ever taught, right?? Have you tried comparing horror stories with all of her previous victims??
Oh wait, I'm not talking about the supposed students who came before your son that were also victimized by this excessive & abusive "posting of Z's all over the place", No, I'm actually wondering if there were other butt-hurt parents who came before you, that too threw a bigger tantrum about the Z than their kid did?? No??

It sounds as if you may be exaggerating just a bit due to some frustration or possibly just because you didn't get your way? Because if this teacher truly "has a history of posting Zs all over the place" (in your son's mere 3 months as her student), I imagine you've filled a formal complaint & attached the crushing evidence to the principal, right?

Guess what snowflake? This isn't Elementary school anymore, it's Middle school. It is NOT the teachers job to chase down one freaking assignment for 2 whole weeks.. that's YOUR kids job! That teacher probably has 25+ other kids in that class to focus on too, she doesn't have time to kowtow around with your son for 2 weeks looking for ONE assignment. Are you crazy?? That is absolutely absurd.

Silly question... when your son couldn't find the assignment after the first week, why on God's green earth did he not just complete the assignment again??

Wait, wait don't answer that... I have a feeling I know the reason why (and I'm guessing it probably has something to do with dear old mom, a bit too much pride & not enough maturity (your word, not mine).

Yes, it definitely sucks having to complete an assignment he already did again, especially if he truly handed it in & the teacher lost it. It's not fair, no question about it. But guess what, buttercup??
Life's not fair! Life can sucks sometimes and it definitely won't always be fair, but that's when you just have to suck it up, accept the fact that it is what it is & do it again! Then, you're supposed to actually put it behind you & move on, NOT dwell over something that CAN'T be changed (a novel idea, I know). He may not like having to do an assignment twice, but at least he won't have to worry about getting a Z for that assignment. Completing the assignment again would have taught him about a good work ethic & that helps to build a solid character... but still bitching about it weeks later when nothing can be done to change it? Not so much. If you want to be mad at anybody, you should take a long look in the mirror, because YOU should have told him to just get it over with & do it again, period.

Set a better example mom, just move on.

I have to agree with this. Especially as the story unfolded over your posts, it became so much less...heartrending.

[Anonymous]

Mom of SN son here. We've all been through this and some teachers are better than others when it happens. Here's my advice. Acknowledge that it's unfair but use it as a learning experience. Two issues: doing everything with Edline timely and realizing that he bears the burden of proving he did it. As for the latter, we started scanning all homework to teachers. But for your sons sake, let it go.

[Anonymous]

I bet you the kid forgot to hand in his homework. Yes, occasionally teacher might misplace homework, but since your DS has a history of losing homework, that the heck?

[Anonymous]

It's an opportunity for a good life lesson about shit happening (papers get misplaced ) etc