What exactly is the problem with "over-programmed" kids?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Kids today have very little free-time. NPR had this discussion a few months back where they said something like a 5 year old today is on the level of a 3 year old 60 years ago. They said that school success (and gen. success in life) comes from the ability to 'self-regulate' and that kids learn this through unstructured, unregulated play. I do think kids are 100% overscheduled...kids go from daycare all day or all day school to ballet class, art class, soccer, etc. sometimes filling every single afternoon with activities.

I tell you my child is prob. the only kid in his NW preschool that just goes and plays in the park or backyard or house after school. I am bombarded with requests for him to join 'abracodoodle, gymnastics, etc, etc' with his friends at school. now what I do notice is that my sons have an uncanny ability to play by themselves without needed constant adult interaction/stimulation. My oldest at 3.5 will loose himself in imaginative play,,,the 14month old looks at picture books..when other adults are over they leave me the hell alone while their friends are begging mommy to play every 5 seconds and high pitch whining if they don't. I always get asked how my kids are so calm and relaxed...i'm a total type A so it's not my genetics but i really think it has a lot to do with the pace my husband and I set for them. We aren't jam pack every single minute of after school and weekends with activities, trips, etc...

kids brains and imaginations need some time away from this crazy hectic pace. Just my 2 cents. and before someone blasts me...thisis what a teacher told me "Your child can always find something to entertain himself so what happens is every kid in the class will migrate over towards him because he is always having fun and then they want to do what he's doing'. He is a very social kid with lots of friends but after a full day of preschool he is thankful to have some downtime with his own things in his own home.

I tend to really agree with this. We have an 11 month old so a bit young to be overscheduled yet, but I hope I don't fall into that trap. My mom works with kids and she always warns me, not to put our child into everything - she does think it leads to kids who need attention, and I agree. Kids need to be able to entertain themselves and play by themselves.

I am not worried about my kid learning everything right now or so young. She has her life to play sports, learn about music, etc. I'm confident we can build a good foundation for her without introducing her to everything in her first few years. I will be happy if she well-loved, secure, sweet, and a has sense of humor. She doesn't need to learn horseback riding and tennis and 3 languages right now!