Why top tier* is important:

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:did you need to start another thread on this?

In all likelihood, this is the single most important thing in OPs life so yes, OP probably did need to start a whole new thread to try and justify their fixation. It's a sickness.

[Anonymous]

OP, it sounds like you have a big insecurity issue. I'm glad that you found a way to fix it for yourself. Other people deal with their psychological issues in other ways, which is fine too. They key is for us to each find a reality that makes us feel comfortable in our own skin.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:These differences are perceived by people who are attempting to rationalize joining the rat race at 13 years old (or earlier) and going to an "elite" school. The rest of us don't care much (AND I had fun in college).

It's only a rat race to interlopers that didn't groom their kids properly and are trying to play catch up in the 7th 8th 9th. I know many families that effortlessly condition their children to simply glide into an elite college. It's just a natural occurrence; organic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Huh. I went to Binghamton. I'm happily married to someone who went to a state school in their state. I've NEVER apologized for where I went to school and never would. I've never had a hard time getting a job. I've never felt I have to PROVE how smart I am.

This seems like a load of crap.

All due respect, you have no idea what an elite college is like. As Rumsfeld would put it, the elite college experience is a known unknown to you.

The thing is though, I'm almost 40. I'm friends with bartenders and people who work in harm reduction and never finished high school, and partners at law firms who graduated from Yale and Stanford and working actors who graduated from Julliard. I've had parties with both types present. Nobody is talking about where they went to college by this age. Nobody gives a crap anymore. Around mid 20's when everyone has finished grad school, you stop talking or caring about where people went to school. It becomes irrelevant.

[Anonymous]

It's only a rat race to interlopers that didn't groom their kids properly and are trying to play catch up in the 7th 8th 9th. I know many families that effortlessly condition their children to simply glide into an elite college. It's just a natural occurrence; organic.

I find people who swoon at the behavior of the upper class creepy. I imagine sad-sack Truman Capote wannabees.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:These differences are perceived by people who are attempting to rationalize joining the rat race at 13 years old (or earlier) and going to an "elite" school. The rest of us don't care much (AND I had fun in college).

It's only a rat race to interlopers that didn't groom their kids properly and are trying to play catch up in the 7th 8th 9th. I know many families that effortlessly condition their children to simply glide into an elite college. It's just a natural occurrence; organic.

Generally, the children from such families instinctively understand grammar and punctuation. This works a bit better:

It's only a rat race to interlopers who didn't groom their kids properly and are trying to play catch up in the 7th, 8th, or 9th grade. I know many families that effortless condition their children to simply glide into an elite college. It's just an organic, natural occurrence.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Huh. I went to Binghamton. I'm happily married to someone who went to a state school in their state. I've NEVER apologized for where I went to school and never would. I've never had a hard time getting a job. I've never felt I have to PROVE how smart I am.

This seems like a load of crap.

Agree. I went to Cornell and DH went to state school in his home state and none of OPs post rings true to me.

+1 DH and I both went to mid-tier undergraduate institutions and top-notch graduate programs. Neither of us felt outclassed by our many Ivy-educated peers in graduate school, nor did having attended a non-Ivy undergraduate program affect our career prospects.

[Anonymous]

the only people who care about what school you went to are insecure DCUM posters

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

It's only a rat race to interlopers that didn't groom their kids properly and are trying to play catch up in the 7th 8th 9th. I know many families that effortlessly condition their children to simply glide into an elite college. It's just a natural occurrence; organic.

I find people who swoon at the behavior of the upper class creepy. I imagine sad-sack Truman Capote wannabees.

Many upper middle class families send each kid to an elite. Not donations or secret favors, just good grooming.

[Anonymous]

There is no golden ticket. There is no golden ticket.

Lots of fancy schools on my resume and my neighbors make the same amount of money and live in the same kinds of houses.

People get date raped at fancy schools too. People do weird perverted things at fancy schools. And all those people who don't write in to the alumni magazine? That's because some of them are heroin addicts and some of them are in jail. There are no guarantees in life, folks.

And I"m pretty sure "grooming" is code for something, but I'm not sure what exactly. Can someone enlighten me?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:These differences are perceived by people who are attempting to rationalize joining the rat race at 13 years old (or earlier) and going to an "elite" school. The rest of us don't care much (AND I had fun in college).

It's only a rat race to interlopers that didn't groom their kids properly and are trying to play catch up in the 7th 8th 9th. I know many families that effortlessly condition their children to simply glide into an elite college. It's just a natural occurrence; organic.

Yeah, with those 5-10% acceptance rates, it's a breeze.

[Anonymous]

Who cares, OP? I don't live and breathe what others think of me. Do you?

[Anonymous]

I know a black couple that sent all four kids to D1 universities on athletic scholarships. There's a formula to proper conditioning.

[Anonymous]

Did you really just type the words "The marriage market" in 2016?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:These differences are perceived by people who are attempting to rationalize joining the rat race at 13 years old (or earlier) and going to an "elite" school. The rest of us don't care much (AND I had fun in college).

It's only a rat race to interlopers that didn't groom their kids properly and are trying to play catch up in the 7th 8th 9th. I know many families that effortlessly condition their children to simply glide into an elite college. It's just a natural occurrence; organic.

No it's only a rats race for the poor and middle class. The true rich use collage as a finishing school. When the kids graduates they have a job at the family business...no worries about grades or what not. You a crazy if you think it is a meritocracy...it a plutocracy. You may get a few crumbs...be happy with that.