MCPS policies for parental notification when children are hit in school

[Anonymous]

OP here. Seems like no one is surprised and that no one knows of a policy per se.

I want to clarify: my heart breaks for the child who was struggling so much he had a meltdown. I don't think it's my business to know what he specific needs are. But I guess if my own child is getting hit I'd like to know it. On the one hand, I don't want there to be an expectation created that it's okay to be hit and it's no big deal. On the other hand, I don't want to blow everything up but yesterday sounded really scary and I think the kids are processing it in their own way and I would think parents should be part of that processing.

Fortunately, my daughter is very verbal so I hear every little detail so we could talk about it. Still, it is out of the mouth of a 7-year-old.

Anyway, thank you all for taking the time to respond.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Seems like no one is surprised and that no one knows of a policy per se.

I want to clarify: my heart breaks for the child who was struggling so much he had a meltdown. I don't think it's my business to know what he specific needs are. But I guess if my own child is getting hit I'd like to know it. On the one hand, I don't want there to be an expectation created that it's okay to be hit and it's no big deal. On the other hand, I don't want to blow everything up but yesterday sounded really scary and I think the kids are processing it in their own way and I would think parents should be part of that processing.

Fortunately, my daughter is very verbal so I hear every little detail so we could talk about it. Still, it is out of the mouth of a 7-year-old.

Anyway, thank you all for taking the time to respond.

I completely agree with you but the law unfortunately does not.

And one of the reasons we left public after 2nd grade.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Well, I think it is complicated. A child for whom they had to clear the classroom very likely has some sort of behavioural management plan in place. As the parent of a 1st grader in MCPS, I would not expect to be notified if a situation was dealt with by the teacher/counselor and my child was uninjured.

I also would not expect to be notified if a child was out of control, but no one was hurt. I feel like the privacy of the child with the special needs trumps my desire to know every detail of my own child's day. I also have not had any reason to believe, at my child's school, that hitting is tolerated. It seems to be dealt with by the teacher/counselor/administration and therefore I don't need a special letter home unless my child was actually hurt.

+1
Being at an ED cluster school this happens periodically but the special needs children have aides who help them and it's not as big of a deal as you might imagine. The school sometimes moves students to protect the special needs child from embarrassment not because anyone is likely to be harmed. I would not expect to be notified unless my child was injured which is the same standard the school system adhere to when it comes to non special needs children. DD has been hit several times in the past year but not by any of these students in the program and we were never told.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
My child is in first and this is just run of the mill at our school. Behavioral issues, special needs, etc.. are all combined in the classes now. Some kids get a 1on 1 aide and some don't. But either way, it can be very dangerous and challenging because the aide is just some joe smoe and doesn't have a special ed or behavioral degree. If you try to speak up in favor for more info or complain, they will tell you, you are against special needs assimulation and a horrible person. It is a no win situation. I am sorry this has happened. I would not be surprised if you don't get any info about the class evacuation.

Not atypical at our school either. I know of one set of parents who grumbled about some incidents involving a special needs children and did not involve any injuries. The administration gave all the right assurances, but some parents got wind of this and it was not well received. It may just be the personality of our school but, yes, depending on the way you bring this up some people may see you as a horrible person.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter's in first grade and has been hit several times in class last year and this year -- by three different kids, each of whom it seems like is struggling with some level of behavioral issues. The latest incident seemed pretty out of control. From what the kids are saying, one of their classmates had a meltdown, tore apart the classroom and hit several kids. The class was then evacuated and the kids spent the day in another room.

I've never gotten notified about these incidents from the teachers or the school.

I shrugged off the first two incidents (although I did reach out to the teachers to say: my daughter says she got hit, is that right? and talked to my child about always letting an adult know if someone hits you). But this latest incident has me concerned and questioning what the MCPS policy is around violence in school and notifying parents. It seems like this latest incident should rise to the level of parental notification.

Does anyone have a resource or MCPS policy they can point me to? I'm going to reach out to the teacher and principal, but I want to have some facts on hand.

Thank you!!

My child is in first and this is just run of the mill at our school. Behavioral issues, special needs, etc.. are all combined in the classes now. Some kids get a 1on 1 aide and some don't. But either way, it can be very dangerous and challenging because the aide is just some joe smoe and doesn't have a special ed or behavioral degree. If you try to speak up in favor for more info or complain, they will tell you, you are against special needs assimulation and a horrible person. It is a no win situation. I am sorry this has happened. I would not be surprised if you don't get any info about the class evacuation.

This has been my experience as well.
But let's face it, the MCPS budget has been cut year after year after year. Hogan cut our budget by 50% this year. (Did he think the kids were sitting on piles of money at school?) So that is why the school system has to hire people who are 100% not qualified to handle this type of thing.

Anonymous wrote:It sounds like there is a conflict between what you expect and what the school can provide without compromising the privacy of a child with special needs. Was your child injured when this kid acted out? Did she go to the nurse?

Sometimes this does get tricky. My kid was injured by a child with special needs (like, marks left on her body several days later), and no the school did not notify me. It was roughly the fifth or sixth time. I lost count, to be honest.

I don't want to violate anyone's privacy fwiw. I just want, like every other parent wants, my kid to be safe at school.

There has to be a way to balance things more effectively.
Let's be real: the needs of the kid who is melting down and lashing out and causing an unsafe environment are clearly not being met either, or that situation would not be happening.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Seems like no one is surprised and that no one knows of a policy per se.

I want to clarify: my heart breaks for the child who was struggling so much he had a meltdown. I don't think it's my business to know what he specific needs are. But I guess if my own child is getting hit I'd like to know it. On the one hand, I don't want there to be an expectation created that it's okay to be hit and it's no big deal. On the other hand, I don't want to blow everything up but yesterday sounded really scary and I think the kids are processing it in their own way and I would think parents should be part of that processing.

Fortunately, my daughter is very verbal so I hear every little detail so we could talk about it. Still, it is out of the mouth of a 7-year-old.

Anyway, thank you all for taking the time to respond.

Your initial shock was the same as mine, although our situations began in K. But just because privacy is involved doesn't mean you should do nothing, nor does it mean you should blow things up. Still, you can talk to the teacher, talk to the principal. Every kid needs an advocate and it's your job to be your kids advocate. They may work a little harder to ensure some distance between your kid and the one lashing out.

At our school the kids who lash out do not have aides, my goodness, I wish! Sometimes if they are close to a meltdown and the teacher sees it coming she will send them to one of our two school para's for a break.

But no, my experience has been that we are not notified in the event of an injury or incident in the classroom.
I will say it has gotten a little easier for my daughter to avoid and process as she has gotten older.

[Anonymous]

I am sorry your child was hit. My dd also in 1 grade was in a fight on Monday. She is a very calm kid but this kid has been picking on her for months.he pulls her hair,steal her lunch box and etc.we had meetings with the parents and the principle.Finally,my daughter had enough!! This past monday,he went to her packpack and took her lunch money.she told the teacher and he was send to the office. Money was return and all good.At recess,he attacked my daugher.She fought back and broke his arm and send him to tgr Er! ! Dd and the kid got a week suspension.where was mcps when he was harsing my kid.I had enough.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am sorry your child was hit. My dd also in 1 grade was in a fight on Monday. She is a very calm kid but this kid has been picking on her for months.he pulls her hair,steal her lunch box and etc.we had meetings with the parents and the principle.Finally,my daughter had enough!! This past monday,he went to her packpack and took her lunch money.she told the teacher and he was send to the office. Money was return and all good.At recess,he attacked my daugher.She fought back and broke his arm and send him to tgr Er! ! Dd and the kid got a week suspension.where was mcps when he was harsing my kid.I had enough.

I am so sorry this is happened and recess is extremely dangerous. We have 3 para's that stand under the one tree and talk the ENTIRE recess. Sometimes there are 1-2 volunteers that walk around and try to help but it if an F'ing zoo out there. 12 classrooms of 1st and 3rd graders and 3 adults. Insane! Last year I found kids under the water fountain drinking the dripping chemicals. And how are these schools some of the best in the country?

I am glad your daughter stood up for herself but I am sorry she broke his arm. Not because he didn't deserve it but it might emotionally scar her and it obviously got her in more trouble than she should have.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter's in first grade and has been hit several times in class last year and this year -- by three different kids, each of whom it seems like is struggling with some level of behavioral issues. The latest incident seemed pretty out of control. From what the kids are saying, one of their classmates had a meltdown, tore apart the classroom and hit several kids. The class was then evacuated and the kids spent the day in another room.

I've never gotten notified about these incidents from the teachers or the school.

I shrugged off the first two incidents (although I did reach out to the teachers to say: my daughter says she got hit, is that right? and talked to my child about always letting an adult know if someone hits you). But this latest incident has me concerned and questioning what the MCPS policy is around violence in school and notifying parents. It seems like this latest incident should rise to the level of parental notification.

Does anyone have a resource or MCPS policy they can point me to? I'm going to reach out to the teacher and principal, but I want to have some facts on hand.

Thank you!!

My child is in first and this is just run of the mill at our school. Behavioral issues, special needs, etc.. are all combined in the classes now. Some kids get a 1on 1 aide and some don't. But either way, it can be very dangerous and challenging because the aide is just some joe smoe and doesn't have a special ed or behavioral degree. If you try to speak up in favor for more info or complain, they will tell you, you are against special needs assimulation and a horrible person. It is a no win situation. I am sorry this has happened. I would not be surprised if you don't get any info about the class evacuation.

This has been my experience as well.
But let's face it, the MCPS budget has been cut year after year after year. Hogan cut our budget by 50% this year. (Did he think the kids were sitting on piles of money at school?) So that is why the school system has to hire people who are 100% not qualified to handle this type of thing.

Anonymous wrote:It sounds like there is a conflict between what you expect and what the school can provide without compromising the privacy of a child with special needs. Was your child injured when this kid acted out? Did she go to the nurse?

Sometimes this does get tricky. My kid was injured by a child with special needs (like, marks left on her body several days later), and no the school did not notify me. It was roughly the fifth or sixth time. I lost count, to be honest.

I don't want to violate anyone's privacy fwiw. I just want, like every other parent wants, my kid to be safe at school.

There has to be a way to balance things more effectively.
Let's be real: the needs of the kid who is melting down and lashing out and causing an unsafe environment are clearly not being met either, or that situation would not be happening.

Hogan did not cut the county budget. He cut 50% of the increase they were asking for. So he actually raised the budget but not enough for the county standards. Before complaining about the governor, I encourage you to research and think about the wasted $$ MCPS spends and how they never look to cut unsuccessful bloated programs or their overpaid administrative staff, but continue to increase student/teacher ratios for the political agenda of getting parents to complain on their behalf.

[Anonymous]

In case this sheds any light:

I received a call when my child fell off playground equipment and bumped his head. That's a different situation and injury-related.

When he and a classmate were both shoved or hit by 2 kids on the playground at recess, classmate's parent got a call but I didn't. I didn't get a call because no staff saw my child get hit, he wasn't upset (so no indication of a problem), and he didn't tell a teacher. Classmate's mom got a call because staff saw it happen to her child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Seems like no one is surprised and that no one knows of a policy per se.

I want to clarify: my heart breaks for the child who was struggling so much he had a meltdown. I don't think it's my business to know what he specific needs are. But I guess if my own child is getting hit I'd like to know it. On the one hand, I don't want there to be an expectation created that it's okay to be hit and it's no big deal. On the other hand, I don't want to blow everything up but yesterday sounded really scary and I think the kids are processing it in their own way and I would think parents should be part of that processing.

Fortunately, my daughter is very verbal so I hear every little detail so we could talk about it. Still, it is out of the mouth of a 7-year-old.

Anyway, thank you all for taking the time to respond.

Your initial shock was the same as mine, although our situations began in K. But just because privacy is involved doesn't mean you should do nothing, nor does it mean you should blow things up. Still, you can talk to the teacher, talk to the principal. Every kid needs an advocate and it's your job to be your kids advocate. They may work a little harder to ensure some distance between your kid and the one lashing out.

At our school the kids who lash out do not have aides, my goodness, I wish! Sometimes if they are close to a meltdown and the teacher sees it coming she will send them to one of our two school para's for a break.

But no, my experience has been that we are not notified in the event of an injury or incident in the classroom.
I will say it has gotten a little easier for my daughter to avoid and process as she has gotten older.

I'd agree with this. Communicate with the principal and teachers. Do it via email so you have a record of these incidents.

I agree that the current situation in classrooms and at recess can just be terrible. I've volunteered at recess and at our school, it's 10 classrooms full of kids with 3 aides. It is impossible for the aides to monitor that many kids and we've had all sorts of incidents. At our ES, some of the SN kids have aides, and some do not.

Hope things get better and your kid doesn't have to go through this again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter's in first grade and has been hit several times in class last year and this year -- by three different kids, each of whom it seems like is struggling with some level of behavioral issues. The latest incident seemed pretty out of control. From what the kids are saying, one of their classmates had a meltdown, tore apart the classroom and hit several kids. The class was then evacuated and the kids spent the day in another room.

I've never gotten notified about these incidents from the teachers or the school.

I shrugged off the first two incidents (although I did reach out to the teachers to say: my daughter says she got hit, is that right? and talked to my child about always letting an adult know if someone hits you). But this latest incident has me concerned and questioning what the MCPS policy is around violence in school and notifying parents. It seems like this latest incident should rise to the level of parental notification.

Does anyone have a resource or MCPS policy they can point me to? I'm going to reach out to the teacher and principal, but I want to have some facts on hand.

Thank you!!

My child is in first and this is just run of the mill at our school. Behavioral issues, special needs, etc.. are all combined in the classes now. Some kids get a 1on 1 aide and some don't. But either way, it can be very dangerous and challenging because the aide is just some joe smoe and doesn't have a special ed or behavioral degree. If you try to speak up in favor for more info or complain, they will tell you, you are against special needs assimulation and a horrible person. It is a no win situation. I am sorry this has happened. I would not be surprised if you don't get any info about the class evacuation.

This has been my experience as well.
But let's face it, the MCPS budget has been cut year after year after year. Hogan cut our budget by 50% this year. (Did he think the kids were sitting on piles of money at school?) So that is why the school system has to hire people who are 100% not qualified to handle this type of thing.

Anonymous wrote:It sounds like there is a conflict between what you expect and what the school can provide without compromising the privacy of a child with special needs. Was your child injured when this kid acted out? Did she go to the nurse?

Sometimes this does get tricky. My kid was injured by a child with special needs (like, marks left on her body several days later), and no the school did not notify me. It was roughly the fifth or sixth time. I lost count, to be honest.

I don't want to violate anyone's privacy fwiw. I just want, like every other parent wants, my kid to be safe at school.

There has to be a way to balance things more effectively.
Let's be real: the needs of the kid who is melting down and lashing out and causing an unsafe environment are clearly not being met either, or that situation would not be happening.

This is my opinion also. It's completely reasonable to expect that your 1st grader (who is at most 7!) can go to school and expect not to be hit.

[Anonymous]

To be clear, I think all children have the right to go to school and expect not to be hit. I would hope that all schools are doing what they can to keep kids safe, and to deal with perpetrators appropriately.

I still don't think schools need to inform parents every time something happens. Basically, I think that parents ought to let the school deal with it with the hitter and the hitter's parents/guardians. The hittee is the victim, and should be cared for, but the parents don't NEED to be involved unless there was an injury or unless the school isn't dealing with it.

[Anonymous]

Why would a class need to be evacuated? No judgement, just curious.

One of my kids isn't much of a talker so DH and I would probably be the only parents who had no idea that there was an evacuation!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sometimes this does get tricky. My kid was injured by a child with special needs (like, marks left on her body several days later), and no the school did not notify me. It was roughly the fifth or sixth time. I lost count, to be honest.

I don't want to violate anyone's privacy fwiw. I just want, like every other parent wants, my kid to be safe at school.

There has to be a way to balance things more effectively.
Let's be real: the needs of the kid who is melting down and lashing out and causing an unsafe environment are clearly not being met either, or that situation would not be happening.

Exactly. No one's needs are being met. It's a reasonable expectation that kids shouldn't be subject to violence at school. And that kids who are melting down and lashing out are getting the support they need.