Whose mom always tells them to, "Tone it down!"

[Anonymous]

I have to ask my FIL to please keep it down EVERY time he visits and the kids go to bed. He drinks some Scotch, he starts "holding court," and he is seriously shouting to adults sitting two feet away. He wakes up the kids more than once EVERY time he visits.

So, yeah. "Tone it down" is actually the nice way of telling you to STFU.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm the mom telling my kids to tone it down because I don't want them to grow up to be clueless people who have no awareness of their volume or actions. The world is already too full of people who don't seem to notice or care that their kids are incredibly loud and rowdy--or that they themselves are. I'm always amazed at people in restaurants, trains, waiting rooms, etc who talk at TOP VOLUME to other people or on the phone and seem to be clueless that other people can hear them. Or they just don't care. Maybe it's liberating to be that clueless or indifferent but I don't want my kids to be like them. So--tone it down!

Ditto!! I have two boys. They are loud. I have to constanrly telling them to tone it down. I have a colleague at work who literally shouts all day. I'm so embarrassed for her. I don't want my kids to grow up like that. It's SO cringe-worthy to see people with no self-awareness on this issue.

[Anonymous]

Yeah OP, I had that Mom too, was the same way until she passed away. I did not behave like her, so nothing I did was right and needed to be "toned down" all the time. I'm extremely quiet and introverted, the "toning down" was about not saying or acting in any ways she would not approve.

[Anonymous]

I agree with those who say you may actually need to tone it down. No offense, but loud talkers rarely realize how loud they are or that they're even bellowing at all. I have a friend like this and I often cringe inside when we're out in public. She talks loudly regardless of the subject matter or where we are, swears often, is exuberant in the retelling of stories, and never ever sees the looks she gets from other people. She's a dear with a good heart, she just doesn't realize she takes up all the public space with her inability to tone it down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I actually wish my mom would "tone it down". She is uncomfortable when she is not getting attention and she will begin to get louder and louder, holding people hostage in conversation and completely unaware of how she comes across.

Sibling? Is that you?

[Anonymous]

To answer the thread title: people who are loud and need to tone it down.

[Anonymous]

Lol. My mom tells me "well you are crazy" to whatever is happening. it gave me a complex. I went to therapy to find that I'm totally normal and she is a narcissist.

"tone it down" is just as pejorative. Tell her to "tone it down" and see how she feels...

[Anonymous]

Cool your jets!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lol. My mom tells me "well you are crazy" to whatever is happening. it gave me a complex. I went to therapy to find that I'm totally normal and she is a narcissist.

"tone it down" is just as pejorative. Tell her to "tone it down" and see how she feels...

No, really. Sometimes loud people are just too freaking loud. It's not emotional manipulation or something complex. Just keep your voice down so strangers aren't staring and so that everyone can be heard.

[Anonymous]

My mom says "go easy" if I'm starting to give my husband a hard time about something like going to the store for milk and getting sixteen things we already had but no milk.

"Go easy" bugs me because I am very calm and patient with my lovingly absentminded husband 95% of the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My mom says "go easy" if I'm starting to give my husband a hard time about something like going to the store for milk and getting sixteen things we already had but no milk.

"Go easy" bugs me because I am very calm and patient with my lovingly absentminded husband 95% of the time.

Don't nag in front of company. It makes everyone uncomfortable.