Family and illness, what's typical?

[Anonymous]

I think your reaction is a little extreme. Let it go.

[Anonymous]

I think the expectation that your in laws come to your house and cook you chicken soup in your kitchen is pretty farfetched, and I think if they had actually done that you would not have been happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What's typical in your family if someone is ill during a visit?

My ILs were visiting this weekend and I was sick (high fever, fatigue, flu like). They were here all day visiting my kids, which was great, but acted like I didn't exist and weren't comfortable with my being downstairs around them because they might catch what I had. They'd back away, wouldn't be in the same room, which was funny since they were already in my house. So I felt essentially quarantined in my room. I'd come out because it's my house, but I felt like Typhoid Mary. They just ignored and avoided me.

I asked my DH about it. If our situations had been reversed (him sick, my parents visiting), my mom would have been cooking him chicken soup and we both would have been checking on him regularly, bringing water, etc. My Dad would have made an effort to get the kids outside so the house was quiet. Our focus for the weekend would have been caring for him while getting some quality visiting time in.

I think my ILs are trying to be respectful of my space, but the message I get it that I'm not really part of the family and it's too inconvenient to care for me. It hurt my feelings. Different family practices I guess.

I get what you are saying, but as a mom, when you are sick, its damn near impossible to get actual rest. I've had illnesses that drag on much longer than they should just because there is no one to really take over the kids. They may seem uncaring, but you need peace and quiet to get over this illness fast.

[Anonymous]

Op, you're being overly dramatic. Of course people back away from a sick person. That's why nursing is a career choice for some and not others.