Dreading seeing a relative this Christmas... because I am envious and dumb

[Anonymous]

Why does THIS cousin matter to you? Did some relative try to compare you 2 while you were growing up? When people have to tell you about their accomplishments, they usually exaggerate ALOT. Is her greatest claim to fame is that she married well??

[Anonymous]

Men don't think this way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am dreading seeing my cousin this Christmas, because I am envious of her. I might as well be honest on an anonymous forum, right? She is so confident in herself, and always upbeat and perky and organized and thin. I've always found her to be somewhat shallow and occasionally mean. She met and married a rich, successful guy (think Silicon valley engineer type) in the past year and has spent the past six months traveling and shopping, basically. I know nothing but this outside, superficial stuff, mind you. Meanwhile, my life isn't bad. I have two beautiful children, a good career, a lovely home. I am very grateful for that. My marriage is so-so but that's partly because of the little kid years and all the stuff that goes with that (I'm TIRED). I feel like I put this mammoth effort towards everything- my career, saving money, my kids, etc., etc., with ok results, and that she just takes it easy and things fall into her lap. I know that this is a dumb way of thinking- very stupid. I've felt this way before and then something terrible will happen to the person I'm envious of- they'll get cancer or something horrible like that, and then I'll fell really bad all over again. Why am I like this? I hate it. Tell me how not to be envious of other people and just accept what I have.

OP, it sounds like you wish she will get cancer or something worse... you better stop sending out this bad vibe. This may happen to YOU!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Spending your days traveling and shopping is a meaningless way to live. Sure it looks glamorous but taking a break to relax is enjoyable when it's a break - when your entire life is a break, then you're bored & depressed.

Speak for yourself, we only live once.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am dreading seeing my cousin this Christmas, because I am envious of her. I might as well be honest on an anonymous forum, right? She is so confident in herself, and always upbeat and perky and organized and thin. I've always found her to be somewhat shallow and occasionally mean. She met and married a rich, successful guy (think Silicon valley engineer type) in the past year and has spent the past six months traveling and shopping, basically. I know nothing but this outside, superficial stuff, mind you. Meanwhile, my life isn't bad. I have two beautiful children, a good career, a lovely home. I am very grateful for that. My marriage is so-so but that's partly because of the little kid years and all the stuff that goes with that (I'm TIRED). I feel like I put this mammoth effort towards everything- my career, saving money, my kids, etc., etc., with ok results, and that she just takes it easy and things fall into her lap. I know that this is a dumb way of thinking- very stupid. I've felt this way before and then something terrible will happen to the person I'm envious of- they'll get cancer or something horrible like that, and then I'll fell really bad all over again. Why am I like this? I hate it. Tell me how not to be envious of other people and just accept what I have.

OP, it sounds like you wish she will get cancer or something worse... you better stop sending out this bad vibe. This may happen to YOU!

Omg put down the eggnog... you are totally misreading that. Who wishes cancer on their relatives? I'm petty and jealous, not a malevolent psychopath. I feel bad for being envious of someone and then I learn they have problems I definitely do not want on my plate. Also, repeat after me: bad vibes do not cause cancer. Maybe that helps you sleep at night or something, but it's terrible. Malfunctioning cells cause cancer. You imply that someone who gets cancer may have deserved it, and no one who gets cancer deserves it.