Wife explicitly said no gifts to each other this Christmas

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Backup present for sure. Maybe something you could save for Valentine's Day, if you didn't need it. But Xmas without a gift is pretty dull, unless you're not in the habit of exchanging.

This took me back to my single and dating years. I always had a set of earrings wrapped and ready, just in case the woman I was dating decided to celebrate an event I had not thought about -- six month anniversary -- or I forgot to shop or if I got myself in trouble. If they were not given by Christmas, under the tree they went and a replacement set was purchased.

[Anonymous]

My husband and I have had no gift Christmas's for the last 5 - 6 years. We still sometimes get each other little things. For us it means no gifts over $50 and there is no expectation to get anything.

[Anonymous]

No means yes

[Anonymous]

No means no but if you are worried, I'd sonething like an IOU or a sexy gift like coupon to sexual acts etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No means yes

LOL. I agree.

[Anonymous]

How about theater tickets or concert tickets? It's a gift for her but also kind of a "couple's expense" for entertainment.

[Anonymous]

You know your wifey must better than any one of us posters here do, but if your wife is very smart about finances, then I think she will be fine about it.

However, if she is very materialistic + all that, then she will not be.

[Anonymous]

I'd be annoyed if we said no gifts for financial reasons and he still got me a gift. Thankfully DH knows I don't play silly head games. If you want to do something nice to show your love for her, plan a romantic date night completely unrelated to Christmas.

[Anonymous]

Get a couple of cheap things to unwrap. A book DVD etc.

Don't get her something expensive.

[Anonymous]

Her initial request was reasonable.

Where it veers into the unreasonable is when the woman (1) secretly wants her man to get her something because goshdarnit she is just so special and entitled to a man who puts up with all her unreasonable moods and behaviors and (2) will be butthurt for 1-1000 days because her husband did not just know or even worse took her at face value.

I'd get something worth $20-$50, if you really can't afford that then you are in trouble. Pull it out if she either (1) acts hurt you didn't get anything or (2) got you something. Otherwise it's a birthday present.

[Anonymous]

Do married adults play these games? If I say something to DH there is no hidden meaning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do married adults play these games? If I say something to DH there is no hidden meaning.

+1

I did this shit when I was a teenager with my first couple boyfriends.

As a married woman, I don't play games. I say what I mean and DH does the same. We are doing no gifts this year for each other (similar big year to OP, plus a newborn) and I know we both meant it.

OP, how about as a gift you get a gift certificate for some couples counseling if your wife is the type that thinks this is okay in an adult relationship!

[Anonymous]

I have done this, my husband has gotten me something any way, and it's pissed me off greatly. I vote for the love letter route. So sweet and no violation of your agreement.

[Anonymous]

No gift means no gift, I wouldn't even question it.

[Anonymous]

Get her something sentimental..but cheap..a nice framed shot of the two of you with a gift card to your favorite restaurant