Any federal benefits for my opposite-sex live-in partner?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He sounds like a deadbeat. You aren't married but he is a stay at home dad? That is like every man's dream. Thanks for contributing to the breakdown of the family structure in America.

...and why don't we say the same about stay at home moms?

Where have you been? People say crap like this about unmarried mothers all the time. The relevant part here is the lack of commitment, not the stay-at-home status.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am in a similar situation to you. My partner is a great partner, not a deadbeat, but he is an artist and that's not a job that easily provides benefits. I regret that it isn't possible to get benefits for him thru my federal job unless we marry.

Lots of people may judge our decision, but I stand by it. I married and was widowed in my twenties. That was a scarring experience, and I don't want to remarry. Ever.

Now you have the same choice as heterosexual couples. Get married to get health benefits or don't get married and face the consequences.

Funny how the word partner makes you assume that I'm gay. I'm not. I'm a woman, who is with a man.

My first husband died of cancer. It was brutal, and I made a promise to him, myself and god never to marry again. It was a young, naive promise to make - but I did it and I stand by it today.

So now I'm 40 and have been in a new relationship for a decade. We have two kids. As you point out, we do have the option to marry, but I have chosen not to out of respect for my deceased husband. So perhaps I deserve to "face the consequences" as you so kindly put it. Or maybe the wonderful committed relationship that I'm in now is just as valuable and honorable as your marriage, and perhaps society should learn to recognize it...

Clearly it is not as valuable or honorable as your first marriage, or you would treat your current partner with as much respect as you did your first husband. Bully for you for living by your 20something self's high and mighty principles, but is this really what's best for your current family? You are withholding all kinds of benefits from your partner, and for what? Is this what your dead husband would have wanted? I'm assuming your kids are covered with a family plan, so it's not like adding a husband would increase your premiums. So marriage would give him FREE HEALTH INSURANCE. How much is he paying now out if his artist's riches for health insurance?

"a new relationship for a decade"...you have been with this man for what, twice as long as you were with your husband, you have KIDS with him, and it's still the new relationship?

Something tells me you like being judged by people like me. It makes you feel better about yourself.

[Anonymous]

In other words, OP:

An individual in the USA must rely on the good will of an employer, or obtain legal marriage papers through the good will of another individual, who also relies on their employer, just to get freaking health care. It's still obscenely expensive, just a bit less so.

If your job is unpaid, consisting of caring for your kids and household, and your partner isn't willing to legally marry you, sorry. You are considered worthless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He sounds like a deadbeat. You aren't married but he is a stay at home dad? That is like every man's dream. Thanks for contributing to the breakdown of the family structure in America.

[phone]