Fit vs. ranking

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I didn't get the sense you were asking about price but rather about rankings.

Pick fit over rankings 100%. My DD did this, picked a school she fell in love with even though she could have gotten into much higher ranked schools. She's there now, ecstatically happy and being very challenged academically.

The higher ranking schools are not necessarily where you will get the best education.

Well, I am asking about both. If we could afford full pay, I'd definitely say fit. But, since we can't, I'm wondering if it's worth it to (likely) have to go into debt for "fit," even though there is a great, much higher ranked university, that she can afford and would get in. It's not a "bad" fit, she liked the campus when we visited, but she's since found schools that fit her better and she likes more.

[Anonymous]

I don't think I would give in for this or put yourself under so much financial pressure because she wants to go to Fordham.

[Anonymous]

Another thing to consider, which deserves its own thread, is the amount of money flowing at a lot of these Catholic schools. (I'm sure it's not just the Catholics.) I've heard from parents whose kids are at these urban schools and the amount of money that gets spent on clubbing, bottle service, etc., is really over the top, even for your average upper middle class kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn't get the sense you were asking about price but rather about rankings.

Pick fit over rankings 100%. My DD did this, picked a school she fell in love with even though she could have gotten into much higher ranked schools. She's there now, ecstatically happy and being very challenged academically.

The higher ranking schools are not necessarily where you will get the best education.

Well, I am asking about both. If we could afford full pay, I'd definitely say fit. But, since we can't, I'm wondering if it's worth it to (likely) have to go into debt for "fit," even though there is a great, much higher ranked university, that she can afford and would get in. It's not a "bad" fit, she liked the campus when we visited, but she's since found schools that fit her better and she likes more.

Tell her what you are able/willing to pay, and let her decide if the favorite school is worth taking on the difference in loans. My parents did it for me, and I chose the school I really wanted, then took extra classes to graduate a year early so it came out to be the same price anyway.

[Anonymous]

Can I suggest that you read The Color Of Money article about Michelle Singletary's daughter wanting to go to UNC and ending up at UMd (I think, that's the one). If you google it, it might give you some insights.

If you tell your daughter how much you can pay and leave it up to her (as PPs suggested), I think it's VERY important for you to also discuss her major and the types of jobs that she might get (including the types of salaries that those jobs have)... and exactly how much PER MONTH and for how many years she will have to pay it back. Then you should talk about how much rent is for an apartment and food, etc. etc.

If you just tell an 18 yr old "you decide" and "you'll have to pay the loans," the 18 yr. old won't really understand the impact of the choice. She'll just think "oh, I'll get a great job and I can pay it back later with no problem." Even at 25, the concept of what it would take to pay back $70K in grad school loans was just amorphous to me.

The reality is that undergrad education is probably not going to be the end of the road. There will likely be grad school after that too. Starting out with $60K loans (even if there is no grad school or it is paid via military or through being a TA/research asst.), puts anyone in a 10+ yr. delay on being able to afford a first house, car, etc. etc. I don't want to sound dramatic, OP, but if you are really thinking that the child is going to pay back $60K in loans, then make that clear to her (i.e. you won't be taking responsibility for them later), and realize she is going to be starting her adult life (after college) in a huge disadvantage for buying a house and saving for retirement, and starting a family, etc. Debt is very limiting.

(Been there, done that. The kids who left grad school without any debt could immediately start saving for a house. I, on the other hand, lived in a sketchy apartment where the daylaborers were picked up by honking horn at 5:30 a.m.!)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Another thing to consider, which deserves its own thread, is the amount of money flowing at a lot of these Catholic schools. (I'm sure it's not just the Catholics.) I've heard from parents whose kids are at these urban schools and the amount of money that gets spent on clubbing, bottle service, etc., is really over the top, even for your average upper middle class kid.

Wait, Catholic = urban? What?

FWIW, We have 2 in college at different urban campuses. One spends tons of (her summer-earned) money and the other spends practically nil. But in general, we're happy with their decision to attend college with an urban campus -- a little more learning of life's lessons we've found.

And if there's any luxury of choice, fit is a infinitely more important that rank or minimal student loan debt, IMO.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another thing to consider, which deserves its own thread, is the amount of money flowing at a lot of these Catholic schools. (I'm sure it's not just the Catholics.) I've heard from parents whose kids are at these urban schools and the amount of money that gets spent on clubbing, bottle service, etc., is really over the top, even for your average upper middle class kid.

Wait, Catholic = urban? What?

FWIW, We have 2 in college at different urban campuses. One spends tons of (her summer-earned) money and the other spends practically nil. But in general, we're happy with their decision to attend college with an urban campus -- a little more learning of life's lessons we've found.

And if there's any luxury of choice, fit is a infinitely more important that rank or minimal student loan debt, IMO.

I'm the PP (9:57)... I'm not saying avoiding debt should trump everything else. I'm just saying that OP should make sure her daughter has (1) the cold, hard numbers, and (2) the truth about WHO is actually going to pay the debt in her mind when she makes a decision about borrowing $60K. That is a very, very serious decision for an 18 yr. old to make. IF she is going to be given that authority, then she needs to be well informed about what she is giving up in order to get the better fit.

Many people think they want something now and that they'll be able to pay it off easily later. But, when "later" comes, they wish they hadn't made that choice. (reference the credit card debt that so many people carry). Be clear about what the choice is.