I envy my friend's husband

[Anonymous]

You married this man. You can't tell me his laissez-faire attitude is new.

[Anonymous]

Don't worry, OP. If your husband is as you describe your kids will see the truth soon enough. That also means they will see the truth about you. They will wonder why you stayed with such a looser and thus have no respect for you. Or you could try to help your husband change and have a healthy marriage.

[Anonymous]

Put me in the 'husband too strict' camp. I wish my husband would relax and just have fun with the kids. But I have fought tooth and nail (including threatening - and meaning it - divorce) if he doesn't ease up on them. He has tried but he simply can't let go, even though he sees the damage to their self-esteem.

Bottom line, your kids are better off than mine because your husband hasn't destroyed their sense of self. Your kids do what they determine is the right course, because you advise them and then step back. Even if he doesn't back you up, they hear you. Share your wisdom with them and try to appreciate what he is giving them.