If you have a parent with a personality disorder (or other serious mental illness)

[Anonymous]

My mother is paranoid schizophrenic and not allowed in our house. She hasn't been seen my DS or DH in 8 yrs. I speak with her on the phone a few times per month, keeping it light and superficial, and I send her baskets of food for bdays and holidays.

[Anonymous]

I understand that having mentally ill family members is hard. But seriously. People and reactions like the ones in this thread are the reason people with mental illnesses don't tell anyone about it, look for help or go through treatment. Wow. So hurtful.

[Anonymous]

No ... but my children do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I understand that having mentally ill family members is hard. But seriously. People and reactions like the ones in this thread are the reason people with mental illnesses don't tell anyone about it, look for help or go through treatment. Wow. So hurtful.

No, that's wrong. Some people with or without mental illness can be damaging to family member, to the point of being debilitating. That that is due to mental illness doesn't mean people cut them out for the sake of cutting out a mentally ill person -- it is for self preservation. I doubt anyone would do it frivolously, just because of a label.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I understand that having mentally ill family members is hard. But seriously. People and reactions like the ones in this thread are the reason people with mental illnesses don't tell anyone about it, look for help or go through treatment. Wow. So hurtful.

No, that's wrong. Some people with or without mental illness can be damaging to family member, to the point of being debilitating. That that is due to mental illness doesn't mean people cut them out for the sake of cutting out a mentally ill person -- it is for self preservation. I doubt anyone would do it frivolously, just because of a label.

+1

If you know the grandparent is capable of harming or endangering a vulnerable child then it is wrong as a parent to expose your child to a known risk. When you have mentally ill parents, it is a serious judgment call as to level and nature of contact.

I send cards, letters and photos to my schizophrenic mom. That is probably about her comfort level too, based on experience.