To visit the inlaws or not...

[Anonymous]

You don't need to go. I have found that IL are only interested in the grandkids anyway. Even my own parents could care less if I went to their house, as long as the grandkids are there. (And they are loving individuals). Suits me just fine, I drop them off and get stuff done.

My DH used to take our child to his mom's on the weekend for a couple of hours. (She lived close by.)

It really depends on your IL. If they treat you like a kid, then I would tell DH he can have a good time (and mean it) without you.

[Anonymous]

I love my in-laws and they love me, but long ago I stopped participating in the summer visit. My rationale is that they (justifiably) want to see grandkids first, DH second, and me last. It would be a much bigger deal if one of the kids opted not to go!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's a long weekend. It's family. If it's only once a year or so, I would go. That's what you sign up for when you get married.

(This does not apply if they are abusive to you or the kids or if your spouse is a jerk who treats you badly in front of IL's.)

This. You go. You make nice. You get away whenever you can to rest or read a book or whatever. They are your husband's parents--this is an important relationship to him.

[Anonymous]

I try not to go.

My ILs have no interest in seeing me. I am a barrier to their son as far as they are concerned. In their world, he comes first by such a long shot, our kid is a very very distant second, and I don't even rank.

Since our kid is still little, she hasn't figured it out yet, but it won't be much longer.

Actually, I'm usually tempted to send him by himself so that they don't even have to go through the farce of pretending they want to see the rest of us.

[Anonymous]

I stopped visiting my in-laws a long time ago, but that is because MIL is abusive and DH gets stressed out and treats me like crap when we're around them. After one particularly horrible visit, I put my foot down and said I wasn't doing it again.

This is not your situation, OP. If you think their feelings would be hurt by you not going, you should go. It doesn't seem like it's worth causing family strife just because you don't have much in common with them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm facing a week-long trip this summer to my ILs. What will I do?

DRINK HEAVILY

+100.

And bring a good book to read quietly in your room for several hours a day. Let DH manage the kids and the outtings and his folks, you can just pop up here and there once the wine kicks in. Claim "stomach issues" if you need a reason to be in bed.