What to do about shopaholic MIL spoiling children

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She sounds just like my MIL. The amount of clothing and toys she gives my DD is overwhelming. No advice (I've tried a bunch of things that haven't worked) but lots of commiseration! I like your photo idea, but "Boo" is the exact response I would've gotten too

Me too, and then I'd get something else even worse. Mine isn't quite this bad, but my parents do it too, so it ends up in the same place. Sometimes I feel like we (DH and I) can't get them anything at all because there's so much coming from the grandparents. My new plan is to regularly get rid of stuff. They like the shopping so much, I suspect they won't even notice anything other than extra space for more stuff. As soon as they give them the items, they're largely forgotten.

[Anonymous]

Nothing you can do but mitigate the back end. This isn't a hill you want to die on... Basically start giving away toys that kids don't use and model good behavior/graciousness etc through the gifts you give them.

[Anonymous]

My MIL & Mom do this! I've started consigning everything once they grow out of it or after they have played with it for a few months, the money goes into their 529s. I wish I could talk them into putting money direct into the college funds but they both say that's no fun.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thanks for the commiseration ladies. I really just wish she would put the money in their college funds or pay for their activities one month.

[Anonymous]

Can you return some of the clothing or toys for store credit? Sell the gift cards on eBay or use the Amazon credit?

[Anonymous]

Sounds like my MIL too. I keep what we like and I give away the rest. She buys so much crap she can't remember what she bought.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just tell her that anything she buys them will be donated to the local children's shelter. And then do it. Honestly, she should be respecting your requests as the parent.

Exactly. If she does have an addiction, have a chat w FIL or have DH do it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My MIL does this too. She has an Amazon account and just ships stuff to our house.

My mother does this too. She lives and breathes Amazon now and I can't imagine how much she has already spent on shipping alone because some of the items are shipped piece by piece. At one point we had a pile of boxes in the corner just from her shipments. It's generous and I'm grateful but it's getting to be too much already and I'd like to see her spend the money on something for herself like a trip to the spa or vacation with my father.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She sounds just like my MIL. The amount of clothing and toys she gives my DD is overwhelming. No advice (I've tried a bunch of things that haven't worked) but lots of commiseration! I like your photo idea, but "Boo" is the exact response I would've gotten too

I told my MIL to knock it off, but she didn't. Now I just intercept the Amazon boxes and take them to Toys for Tots or Goodwill. If she brings a bunch of other stuff into the house, I take older stuff to the Goodwill.

[Anonymous]

Is this really worth fighting over? Some grandparents just enjoy being able to spoil their grandkids. It can be annoying to have so much stuff but she is giving from love which is all that matters. You can always put some of the toys in a closet and rotate bringing them out.