Vent: husband drunk and I'm 38 weeks

[Anonymous]

My husband had the occasional beers when I was pregnant and the smell sort of bothered me. But no way did he ever get drunk, especially to the point of puking.

Is this something he does every now and then or is this out of character for him? It seems strange that he would do something like that out of the blue..

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So I usually cut my husband some slack, but after listening to him vomit in our side alley and front yard and make a ton of noise coming home drunk from not eating dinner and going out, I'm ticked. I'm a pretty laid back person but I could have my baby any day now and my husband is totally trashed. What if I went into labor? No way he could drive or get me through delivery. Not to mention I felt awful not waiting up for him and falling asleep only to realize he is blitzed. Now I feel like a parent waiting up for a teenager, our bedroom reeks of a bar and I can't get to sleep, mainly thinking of him stupidly walking home drunk rather than getting a car and bring a potential victim for crime or worse. My husband rocks usually and has done so much for the baby and me, like reading us a bedtime story each night and cleaning and organizing the house and making meals to freeze, but right now I'm livid. Vent over. Le sigh.

I guess I'm the outlier but I think your husband sounds fabulous and one last hurrah doesn't seem like something to be "livid" about given all else he has done. Even where he was -- an event for a volunteer organization -- sounds reasonable. All the other things sound like coming up with justifications for why you have a right to be "livid." If he couldn't drive you to the hospital, you'd take a cab, etc., but you didn't go into labor, so all's well. Have a talk about it, agree he won't do it again and move on and revel in all the other fantastic things he has done for you.

[Anonymous]

OP, I could have written your post 6 years ago when I was pregnant with our first! I remember how angry and sobbing I was when my husband came home sh*tfaced when I was about 37 weeks. We were young (24), and ultimately, I just don't think it was real for my husband until the moment our daughter was in his arms for the first time. He is now the best dad and husband I ever could have imagined, and much more responsible. Given what a sweetheart your husband sounds like, Isy you let this go. But make it clear he has to be sober until your baby arrives. Congrats!

[Anonymous]

After reading your posts, it is easy to understand.

[Anonymous]

God get over it Op you're pregnant not a princess. Your husband is allowed to be human. Sounds like something I may have done the weekend before I knew I was going to be a parent, if I had not been the one pregnant.

[Anonymous]

One of my kids was born in the 38th week. Babies arrive when they arrive.

It's beyond ridiculous for a man to get drunk like that when his wife is so close to her due date. What if she had gone into labor that night? I would be livid, too, if my husband had done something so stupid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So I usually cut my husband some slack, but after listening to him vomit in our side alley and front yard and make a ton of noise coming home drunk from not eating dinner and going out, I'm ticked. I'm a pretty laid back person but I could have my baby any day now and my husband is totally trashed. What if I went into labor? No way he could drive or get me through delivery. Not to mention I felt awful not waiting up for him and falling asleep only to realize he is blitzed. Now I feel like a parent waiting up for a teenager, our bedroom reeks of a bar and I can't get to sleep, mainly thinking of him stupidly walking home drunk rather than getting a car and bring a potential victim for crime or worse. My husband rocks usually and has done so much for the baby and me, like reading us a bedtime story each night and cleaning and organizing the house and making meals to freeze, but right now I'm livid. Vent over. Le sigh.

I guess I'm the outlier but I think your husband sounds fabulous and one last hurrah doesn't seem like something to be "livid" about given all else he has done. Even where he was -- an event for a volunteer organization -- sounds reasonable. All the other things sound like coming up with justifications for why you have a right to be "livid." If he couldn't drive you to the hospital, you'd take a cab, etc., but you didn't go into labor, so all's well. Have a talk about it, agree he won't do it again and move on and revel in all the other fantastic things he has done for you.

Yikes, I found the bolded part vaguely freaky - your husband reads bedtime stories to your unborn child every night? I'd find that almost as revolting as puking on the street. Almost. How old are you kiddos anyway? Regular public intoxication is obviously a problem but if this was a one-off you need to get over your hysteria. If you're an adult you will cope if your husband is unavailable when you go into labor. Cabs, friends, Uber to the hospital as needed.

Fwiw my younger brother was born a few weeks early and arrived unexpectedly very early on New Year's Day. My father was apparently celebrating a bit too much at home and loves to tell the story of going to church that day to mark the occasion (good Catholic that he was) and passing out cigars while reeking of scotch. Great parent, happy marriage, no casualties.

[Anonymous]

Everything seems worse at 2am. I'd ask him to please refrain from getting wasted now that labor is so close, but a one time "oh shit that was a few too many" is not a huge deal. Like others have said, if he is otherwise engaged and a good husband, I would let him know you were annoyed, ask for it not to happen again, but no need to "lay into him". His hangover is probably teaching him a valuable lesson already...

[Anonymous]

So what happened yesterday morning OP? What did your husband say about getting so drunk?

[Anonymous]

Who cares if you're pregnant or not OP? That's not relevant in this situation.

[Anonymous]

He is just nervous. Cut him some slack.

[Anonymous]

I'm the OP. I did cut him some slack. I think he has been working so hard preparing for the baby and getting our house and nursery in order, it was his time to unwind. I was just mad at the time as I'm getting anxious about the upcoming labor/delivery, especially the fact that I have no idea when the baby is coming.

And yes, he reads a bedtime story to me and our baby every night and I think it is the most heartwarming thing ever!