So tired of cooking for my kids when they won't eat it

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thanks all. Harsh but true. A night or two w out dinner wont kill them, you're right. I just have my mother in law in my ear all the time about how she's worried that they aren't getting enough nutrients.

Well, to be honest, if what she sees them eating is chicken fingers and mac and cheese then she might have reason for concern. Feed them like you'd feed yourself (hopefully). Well balanced meals with protein, carb, fruit and/or veg options. They may choose not to eat it, but if they know that mom will serve them processed crap instead of the healthy meal in front of them, of course they'll choose not to eat it!

Do they eat healthy meals and snacks the rest of the day?

Breakfast: Oatmeal and a banana. Cereal and milk. Waffle with peanut butter. Nothing fancy, nothing complicated.

Lunch: Sandwich on whole grain bread. Veggies and hummus. Leftovers from the night before. Options are endless here.

Dinner: Again, well balanced and nutritious.

They will learn to eat well, especially if there aren't other options in front of them.

[Anonymous]

Eat what's on your plate; must have some of everything. I do try to cook something DC will like for each meal. DC has gone to bed hungry and is eating a wider range of food. We don't push it with company but then DC doesn't get dessert without eating a good amount-all explained in advance. Pain but worth it now that DC seems out of a picky stage.

Hey short order cook-wanna come to our house?!

[Anonymous]

Food is personal. I'm not putting anything into my body that I don't want, and I'm inclined to give my kids some leeway with their food choices (all reasonable). We repeat a lot of meals often, because we have things that everyone likes. I make a lot of plain chicken breasts, and we each add our own sauce. Without a lot of drama, the kids eat more and more things all the time. One still doesn't eat certain veg cooked, and one doesn't eat soup but it's really not a big deal to me.

I hated going to bed hungry because my parents made food that grossed me out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you kidding me? You won't cook them anything else unless they eat three bites??

Here's the solution: "kids, I am not a short order cook. Either you eat what I cook or you wait till the next meal." Or give them option of eating a banana.

+1 and my DC is barely 3.

+2 except no banana is offered. Kids are 2 and 4.

[Anonymous]

Yeah. All the let them starve people must have partners who see eye to eye with you on this issue. No matter what I said or did, my picky eating husband would undermine me if I fixed a meal and our daughter didn't eat it. He would openly tell her she could have something else. If I fed she and I first because he was working late, if she didn't like it, she would hold out until he got home and fixed her something. So then it became like he loved her more because he caved to her picky eating. So I stopped making it an issue. She got a separate meal for years and my refusal to fight the battle alone made our relationships all so much better. A few years later, I tried again to expand her palate and have been very successful. She will eat almost anything and will try anything I put in front of her. So, no there is not one way to address the issue. I actually had more success doing exactly the opposite of what my instincts told me to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"Your job is to put a balanced meal in front of your kids. Their job is to eat it." My pediatrician's advice to me when we discussed my 2 picky eaters (5 and 7). So that is what I do. A night or two without dinner won't kill them. An apple (or other piece of fruit) is their only other option.

2YO DD does this at least two nights a week... eats maybe one bite of something I know she's liked in the past. I figure, sometimes I'm not hungry "at mealtime" and maybe she's not either. She's not starving, she's healthy, and I save her plate. Hungry one hour later? Here's your snack

[Anonymous]

OP-- I have a similar fatigue but I have dealt with this issue by finding foods that we will all eat. If they eat spaghetti and meatballs, then try to find some good pasta dishes that you and DH will like, and let them eat the pasta and just heat up some meatballs or chicken (god, I hope you're not making meatballs from scratch!)

If they eat turkey sandwiches (cold cuts? or breast) then try chicken. Then go from there. Build on what they will eat, and then find decent recipes that all will enjoy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Food is personal. I'm not putting anything into my body that I don't want, and I'm inclined to give my kids some leeway with their food choices (all reasonable). We repeat a lot of meals often, because we have things that everyone likes. I make a lot of plain chicken breasts, and we each add our own sauce. Without a lot of drama, the kids eat more and more things all the time. One still doesn't eat certain veg cooked, and one doesn't eat soup but it's really not a big deal to me.

I hated going to bed hungry because my parents made food that grossed me out.

My problem is that I work all day and I work at home most nights too with domestic crap. Sure not going to cook to their liking. I already have two + jobs.

[Anonymous]

Just a follow up question for everyone since I am having a similar issue with my 4 year old. Do to all do a bedtime snack and if so, and your kids don't eat what you gave them for dinner, how do you not make bedtime snack a full meal?

If you don't do a bedtime snack, do your kids start whining that they are hungry at bedtime if they didn't eat what you made for dinner?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just a follow up question for everyone since I am having a similar issue with my 4 year old. Do to all do a bedtime snack and if so, and your kids don't eat what you gave them for dinner, how do you not make bedtime snack a full meal?

If you don't do a bedtime snack, do your kids start whining that they are hungry at bedtime if they didn't eat what you made for dinner?

I am one of those parents who just puts the food out and doesn't fuss much about whether the kids eat it or not. And we don't ever offer another choice. We never have a bedtime snack and I've never heard of doing that. Is that common? Seems like a bad habit to get into.

[Anonymous]

Eh, DS doesn't have to eat what we serve, but I'm not cooking anything else. He always has the option of having a greek yogurt, piece of fruit, or cheese instead. He knows where all of those items are kept, and can go and get one of them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just a follow up question for everyone since I am having a similar issue with my 4 year old. Do to all do a bedtime snack and if so, and your kids don't eat what you gave them for dinner, how do you not make bedtime snack a full meal?

If you don't do a bedtime snack, do your kids start whining that they are hungry at bedtime if they didn't eat what you made for dinner?

Kids are just 4 and just 2. Except for an egg allergy, kids eat what we eat. We both WOH FT and can't cook separate meals. Each night there is something on their plate they will eat. DH draws a hard-line here b/c I short-order cooked with the older kid (who does not have the allergy) and it was way too much. Kids eat what's on their plate or they can refuse, but there are no snacks. Why would a kid eat dinner if they knew they were getting a snack at bedtime? If you have a kid with eating issues or something and that's necessary than that's fine, but our kitchen closes when dinner is over. And kids start dinner with water and if they do a good job, they can have milk. No filling up on milk before food. Our kids are healthy weight, active, blah blah blah and are not picky (well, on any given day they might be, but generally not picky). DH was the initial "enforcer" of this policy when we started it. It took about a week for the message to sink in but it's been great for the past 9 months. Good luck. Just do what works for you.

[Anonymous]

We have a ground rule:
If it's new food, DC must try one bite. For other non-favorite foods on the dinner plate, DC is encourage to take 3-5 bites and then she can have her favorite food like PBJ.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I like being a short order cook. I think it is my true calling. I can whip up just about anything for my little bastards and I'm happy to do it. I don't know why. I am the exception.

We get it. You have no life.

That may be true but we're not talking about gourmet stuff here. One wants chicken nuggets and the other wants mac and cheese. One wants a hamburger and the other wants a sandwich. If we have it, I really don't care. Sad but true.

I'm like this too...there is basically no meal that I can make that everyone will eat. So yes, plenty of times, I just ask the kids what they want and make it, instead of trying for the 80th time to feed them spaghetti, only to hear that kid A HATES pasta and kid B wants meatballs, not ground beef.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I like being a short order cook. I think it is my true calling. I can whip up just about anything for my little bastards and I'm happy to do it. I don't know why. I am the exception.

We get it. You have no life.

That may be true but we're not talking about gourmet stuff here. One wants chicken nuggets and the other wants mac and cheese. One wants a hamburger and the other wants a sandwich. If we have it, I really don't care. Sad but true.

I'm like this too...there is basically no meal that I can make that everyone will eat. So yes, plenty of times, I just ask the kids what they want and make it, instead of trying for the 80th time to feed them spaghetti, only to hear that kid A HATES pasta and kid B wants meatballs, not ground beef.

But how does this prepare the kids to deal with food when eating anywhere else? Like at a dinner party, or lunch at a friend's house?