Fed employee - started new job 4 months ago, just got perfect offer - HELP!

[Anonymous]

If your boss is a decent person she will understand. It's so hard to find the perfect job especially in such a competitive job market. If presented with a better opportunity I would take it regardless of my current job situation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP - This wouldn't be an issue for a man.

OP here. Really? I completely get that I need to look out for myself and that my organization wouldn't hesitate to cut me if they needed to. But don't you also want to strive to leave places on good terms?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP - This wouldn't be an issue for a man.

OP here. Really? I completely get that I need to look out for myself and that my organization wouldn't hesitate to cut me if they needed to. But don't you also want to strive to leave places on good terms?

Yes, of course. It's just that you are beating yourself up over something that, unless they are jerks, they won't hold against you. Certainly not in the long run. I think the PP means that a man might not beat himself up as you are doing; that women want too much for people to like them, or think that they are harming the organization, when most of the time we are all just easily replaceable cogs.

[jindc]

Anonymous wrote:Ok thanks. I guess I'll just have to decide if this job is good enough to do something crappy to this woman, which is basically the bottom line. No, this is an entirely different agency and I don't think I'll run into her again. I hate to have a pissed boss behind me though.

don't put her feelings ahead of yours - I had an amazing job offer the first week I got my first fed job. Short of it is, I WISH I hadn't worried about offending the person who hired me for that first fed job....because now I'm still a fed and miserable. I need to stop thinking "what if". You don't want to do that - follow a job that will make YOU happy and feel valued. If someone will be hurt over it, that's not your fault for pursuing a better opportunity. They shoud be happy for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP - This wouldn't be an issue for a man.

OP here. Really? I completely get that I need to look out for myself and that my organization wouldn't hesitate to cut me if they needed to. But don't you also want to strive to leave places on good terms?

Yes, of course. It's just that you are beating yourself up over something that, unless they are jerks, they won't hold against you. Certainly not in the long run. I think the PP means that a man might not beat himself up as you are doing; that women want too much for people to like them, or think that they are harming the organization, when most of the time we are all just easily replaceable cogs.

Ok, that makes sense. Thanks for this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thanks, PPs. That is my instinct, but at the job before this one, everyone was kind of pissed and acted like that's not the way Feds do it when I didn't disclose until I had actually accepted the offer. I got the impression that Federal employees disclose these things much earlier in the process and that it was rude to the supervisor not to. Really trying to tread lightly on this especially since this woman specifically direct hired me.

No, I have never heard of some kind of "federal employee" exception. Look, the bottom line is that it is a crappy thing to do but most employers will understand that you are leaving for a dream job. Are the two fields related such that you will have to encounter your current boss again?

Ok thanks. I guess I'll just have to decide if this job is good enough to do something crappy to this woman, which is basically the bottom line. No, this is an entirely different agency and I don't think I'll run into her again. I hate to have a pissed boss behind me though.

I'm not the PP who wrote that. I don't think you should look at it as doing something "crappy." The bottom line is you actually don't like the job you have now. This is your career and how you spend at least 40 (if not more) hours a week of your life. Just explain to her if/when you get the other job that it's an opportunity you weren't expecting but cannot turn down. Offer a longer notice period (let's say 3 weeks) or something like that. But I wouldn't refuse a good opportunity, given you don't like the job you have. When you accept a job, there's never any promise of forever. If it turned out that she wasn't happy with your performance during the probation period, she would likely fire you, even though she's the one who brought you on. That's how it works, especially early on in a job. There's a reason they call it probationary period, because no one knows for sure that it will be a happy fit.

Absolutely agree. If you don't pursue this other opportunity even for an initial interview, you will kick yourself, especially if you get fired from this crappy job.

[Anonymous]

Don't disclose the interview.

Is the second job also a Federal position? Even if they love you, and want to make an offer, it may not happen that fast as Federal HR's not always quick like a bunny. You'd hate to tell your manager, have them have veteran's preference candidates come through on this screen, not be able to hire you, have to re-compete the position, re-interview and not finally get on board for 9 months or something.

That said, if they're similar industries, it's not impossible the new place will talk to the old place through the good old boy network. That happened to me once . That this would be a promotion is a great, neutral reason for you to be interested in the job (I was left needing a diplomatic way to say, "I need to leave because y'all are whack") and I'd leave it at that.