Has co-worker ever trashed you?
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Anonymous
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OT but a sincere question. Former colleague was an Alpha Bitch of the first order much like you describe OP.
I moved on to a new position/organization. She just asked me to join her Linkedin network. What is the etiquette here? Though truthfully I'd like to wait it out 'til karma causes her to drop dead while she's chowing down on that extra value meal.... |
Anonymous
| Frenemies are everywhere. |
Anonymous
lol. what? |
Anonymous
| I once had a boss who would stomp his feet and turn red in the face if he was mad but wouldn't talk to us about it (me: Is everything ok? Boss: It's FIIIIIIIIIne! stomp stomp, red-purple face). Gag. |
Anonymous
| I got my job over an internal candidate and he treated me like shit. Finally, the CEO told him that he would have to go. |
Anonymous
Is any of the "trashing" justified? http://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/222841.page |
Anonymous
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Yes, twice that I know of. One was a woman around 50 who never had children. She knew that I was pumping twice a day but tried to give mgmt a few levels above the impression that I just "disappeared" for Starbucks breaks with friends a couple times a day and it was hard to find me. I was new, so they didnt know my work ethic and at the time, she was well respected. I was one of her direct reports. Two separate people overheard her do this and told me. One stood up for me right away and corrected her. In reality, I was so desperate to prove myself, that I outside of pumping, I did everything at my desk.
Years prior, I had a doctor's appt the Tuesday morning after a holiday. It was scheduled, but our former manager's had been promoted and was starting a new job and our new manager was starting that Tuesday. I walked into the office as one of my coworkers was talking to the new manager about me saying to never look for me on a Tuesday after a holiday because I always fonud some reason to call out "sick". In reality, I NEVER ever did that. I was a contractor with no leave (company sucked) and we only received holiday pay if we worked the Tuesday after. I only accepted the appt that Tuesday morning, because it was work related (was going for a higher clearance). I was young and still in undergrad (worked and attended school FT) and here it was some woman who called herself my auntie and acted so sweet in my face. I was pissed, because I knew that it was a very easy narrative to believe given my age vs hers. I walked up and introduced myself right then and there and explained where I'd been and calmly mentioned that our previous manager could vouch for the fact that I hadn't missed a day of work since starting the previous year. She turned beat red and turned around to her desk. That was scary, because had my timing been slightly different, I'd have never known and they'd already laid off about 60% of our group. Fortunately, I started a better job with awesome benefits a few months later. |
Anonymous
| PP here...I forgot to add that the lady from my first example not only lost credibility over time for other reasons, but she was demoted and I was offered her position the next year. As another poster said, karma bitch. |
Anonymous
PP, I'm really sorry, yours is one of the worst scenarios. I also got a job once over an internal candidate, and then she and her bunch of friends sabotaged me for months. It was like middle school over again, except that we were in our early 30s. I'm no longer at that job, thank God, but that situation was extremely stressful. |
Anonymous
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OMG, OP, how did you avoid this? Or are you very young?
I've had this happen three times, always by women. Men are more straightforward, IMHO. It's awful, and eye-opening. In two cases, I had to find another job because the person doing the bad-mouthing was a higher level than I, and the companies were so dysfunctional that it was easier to leave than get embroiled in an outrageous mess created by these mentally ill people. Hard to believe such people end up in positions of authority! |
Anonymous
| Meant to say that the third time, the woman was found out and fired. Yea! Sometimes justice prevails. |
Anonymous
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Yes. I walked into my boss' office as soon as I found out, shut the door, sat down, and talked to her about it.
The guy who did it was a new guy and ended up getting fired before his 90 day probationary period was over. |
Anonymous
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Backstabbing is everywhere in my current job. I probably spend 80% of my time dealing with that shit. I have some major assholes for "peers". Luckily, my boss knows what's up, but the peers report to others, so he's pretty helpless.
It's loads of fun. I just want to do my job and not have to dodge grenades all day. |
Anonymous
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I might win this thread....
I once left a job I wasn't a big fan of because I was bored and unchallenged. I left on what appeared to be good terms - it just wasn't a great fit for my career goals, I did my two weeks, transitioned my work, and I went on my merry way. Or so I thought. A few weeks later I emailed a friend if they happened to want to grab lunch. No reply. Repeat again. I get a reply that they can't really see me given what happened. What happened??? Huh? I reply asking her what she means. Turns out my coworker, with whom I always thought I had a perfectly normal working relationship, went to my boss and said some things. I didnt know what (yet) but I discovered that a company wide email telling staff to call the police if they saw me was sent. Apparently a police complaint was apparently filed. The police wouldn't let me see it unless I filed a subpoena. Off to the lawyers office I go. Few days pass, during which time I am absolutely going nuts wondering what the hell has happened. I get a copy of the complaint. Turns out my coworker claimed I had threatened to come back and destroy property and equipment, had planted a virus on the computers, etc... I mean all sorts of crazy stuff. Another letter from my lawyer gets fired off - claiming that my rights had been violated, the company had not investigated these claims but had emailed several thousand people to call the police if they saw me, etc. I didnt care about money... and had no interest in drawing attention to the issue more than had already occurred, in the end they agreed to lawyer fees and sending an email retraction to staff, which is all I really wanted anyway. To this day however, I am "persona non grata" in two buildings. I don't much care as I've completely changed careers and will never cross path with anyone from there again, but wow, what a peculiar life experience. I never figured out my coworkers motivation - I had already quit, what possible threat was I to him? We were peers - there was no opportunity for him to get a promotion or anything, it just made no sense. It was as if, he just woke up, decided the best way to seem like a good employee was to make up a bunch of crap about me and that somehow, that would translate to ..... what? Looking loyal? I never got it. The strangest thing was that it was all done after I left, so its not even as if I would ever have known about it (if the motivation was spite or hatred)... I only discovered the whole mess by accident. Just goes to show you some people are truly insane. |
Anonymous
| Then there's the other end of the spectrum. Where everyone is independent. But a coworker is likely cheating on time and quality. But there's no one to say anything to. |