How to soften a kid's hard edge? Or... how to help make a child kinder?

[Anonymous]

Pets really help. If you're not ready for an animal, a bird feeder or even a plant is worth trying. I don't have any studies on hand, but I've read-- and my anecdotal experience supports-- that growing up with a pet helps people become more empathetic and considerate. I've seen it in my own daughter. She was always considerate toward our cats, but now that we have a dog it's like she's discovered this mature and nurturing side of herself. I think it's partly because he has sincere and obvious reactions besides annoyance. We don't like it when she kicks the underside of the table and makes loud bangs doing it. The dog gets up and goes away. Conversely, he can give her even more fantastic positive reenforcement than we can, in that throw-my-person-a-tickertape-parade way that only a dog can muster.

I realize that not everyone has an opportunity to get a dog, nor even wants one. But being responsible for a living thing-- from a plant bulb to a goldfish to a dog-- teaches a child why we are nice to others in a very concrete way.

I'll add that I think that this is especially true for only children like mine.