Where Should I Say I am from When People Ask Me?

[Anonymous]

15:47 - you need help, seriously. Not everything is a personal attack. Unless of course you are defensive about where you are from for some reason. Yikes.

My MIL is military and very defensively says "everywhere". Its not really correct, as no one has possibly lived everywhere, but she has other issues. When people hear her response, they chalk it up to other issues.

Unless people are asking anything about money, I reserve the right to assume they mean well.

[Anonymous]

Um, I don't think I need help. I just find it really annoying that 2 minutes after I meet someone they want to know everyplace I've lived. I honestly don't know what difference it would make to them, therefore I don't think I need to answer. If it would make a difference to them, then I definately don't think I should have to answer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At first I thought this was going to be a post about being Asian. Despite having grown up in the US, I am often asked, "No, where are you REALLY from?"

Ha. If you're a Grey's Anatomy fan, there's a funny scene where someone calls in Cristina to translate for an old Chinese patient. Cristina gives them her look and says, "What makes you think I speak Chinese? I'm Korean and I grew up in Southern California." Maybe you had to be there, but it rang so true at the time.

*LOVES* this. Especially as an Asian American who was born and raised in Pittsburgh and who frequently gets "No, where are you REALLY from?" when I answer that.

[Anonymous]

I'm an Army brat and spent a large chunk of time overseas. I graduated from HS at a DoDDS school in Germany. So I struggle with this question as well. Sometimes I say, "Everywhere and nowhere."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am in the same situation as OP and I usually say I've been in Current City X for x number of years and lived all over before that. What I find strange is when they keep pushing you for more information and follow-up with "yes, but where are you Really from, where did you grow up?". I find it really instrusive and bizarre that it would somehow make a difference to them. It really bugs me that they feel entitled to a complete run-down of my previous addresses. I respond politely, but always wish I had the nerve to ask them why it even matters.

They are probably just trying to find some common ground or be personable in conversation. Why are you offended by the question?

[Anonymous]

"all over but I mostly identify with BLANK as I grew up/went to grad school/whatever there"

They are just trying to get a vibe on your values/upbringing. It's not that deep.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I am in the same situation as OP and I usually say I've been in Current City X for x number of years and lived all over before that. What I find strange is when they keep pushing you for more information and follow-up with "yes, but where are you Really from, where did you grow up?". I find it really instrusive and bizarre that it would somehow make a difference to them. It really bugs me that they feel entitled to a complete run-down of my previous addresses. I respond politely, but always wish I had the nerve to ask them why it even matters.


They are probably just trying to find some common ground or be personable in conversation. Why are you offended by the question?

I think I get offended because the people digging usually seem like they are trying to figure our whether you grew up UC, UMC, etc and are up to their "standards" rather than an opportunity to bond over the fact that their aunt now lives in the town where I grew up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm an Army brat and spent a large chunk of time overseas. I graduated from HS at a DoDDS school in Germany. So I struggle with this question as well. Sometimes I say, "Everywhere and nowhere."

I'd think that the moment you say the phrase, "Army brat," it would put it into perspective for many people. I'd rather you say that, than "everywhere and nowhere."

Many people are asking the question, "where are you from?" to find out about you, to see if you have something in common, to find out what you can talk about together. For those people, just give them a little more information so that you can move on in the conversation. For the "intrusive" people, surely that is a minority of people. But in life, we all meet strange and awkward people, so just be gracious.

[Anonymous]

I'd say I mostly grew up in CA and Alabama, or if there is one place you feel more of an affinity for and that's it's "like home" you can just mention that one if you don't feel like going into the detail.

[Anonymous]

To me there is a difference between where you are from and where you have lived.

Originally I'm from ___ but I have lived in ___, ____, and ____.

If someone asks me about a street in Omaha and if I lived near it , I can't say if I did because I never lived there long enough to really know the place type of thing. Pick a place that you consider your home. A town you are familiar with.

[Anonymous]

My history is way more complicated so I hate the question, particularly as there is no good answer for it. I just say where I was born and change the subject.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am in the same situation as OP and I usually say I've been in Current City X for x number of years and lived all over before that. What I find strange is when they keep pushing you for more information and follow-up with "yes, but where are you Really from, where did you grow up?". I find it really instrusive and bizarre that it would somehow make a difference to them. It really bugs me that they feel entitled to a complete run-down of my previous addresses. I respond politely, but always wish I had the nerve to ask them why it even matters.

They are probably just trying to find some common ground or be personable in conversation. Why are you offended by the question?

I agree with this. Might you have lived in my city/state? Did you spend time in my dream location? It's a way of making a connection.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Um, I don't think I need help. I just find it really annoying that 2 minutes after I meet someone they want to know everyplace I've lived. I honestly don't know what difference it would make to them, therefore I don't think I need to answer. If it would make a difference to them, then I definately don't think I should have to answer.

+1

[Anonymous]

I'm an Army Brat as well. I usually tell people I've lived all over the world, but I'm from Mississippi. That's where I was born. That's where my entire family ended up after my daddy retired. My family has lived in Mississippi for generations. That's where I spent nearly every summer during my childhood. And we've lived in Mississippi three different times throughout the years. I feel the strongest ties to Mississippi, so that's where I am from. I would say you are "from" Alabama!

Oh, and BIG game tomorrow..... GO DAWGS! (I married a Georgia boy.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think you should say you're from wherever feels most like home to you.

I agree. I was born in Illinois but grew up in Ohio. We moved around in Ohio a bit and we didn't move to the town I consider my home town until I was 8. But that was the town my family lived in for another 20 years and where my mom moved back to after my dad died it will always be home to me.