"I don't want to work that hard"

[Anonymous]

Having been in an "honors" traveling orchestra as a child, she may be more insightful that you are giving her credit for.

One, it is a big time commitment. Her saying "I don't want to work that hard" may mean "I don't want to work that MUCH." She may be conscious of the drain it will have on her free time to read or pursue other interests.

Second, I enjoyed playing in my school orchestra and on my own. But being in a competitive orchestra added a certain layer of pressure to what I previously doing for enjoyment. Maybe she senses that - she seems very perceptive.

Third, once the novelty wore off, it became something I did to please my parents.

GL

[Anonymous]

Some kids enjoy being average at a wide range of things, while other kids want to be an expert at one thing. Sounds like your DD is the first type.

BTW, it's not being lazy to lay on the couch reading a book. I read all the time (twice a day) and nobody would ever use lazy to describe me.

[Anonymous]

Why is this such a bad thing? This is the motto of some of the people I know who sleep very well at night. Then there are the perfectionists who toil and toil and spin their wheels working hard but working inefficiently because they are burned out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Some kids enjoy being average at a wide range of things, while other kids want to be an expert at one thing. Sounds like your DD is the first type.

BTW, it's not being lazy to lay on the couch reading a book. I read all the time (twice a day) and nobody would ever use lazy to describe me.

Or she could be the second type, the kid who want to be an expert at one thing, but violin isn't the thing.

[Anonymous]

OP, some of us aren't mature enough to appreciate our talents or the rewards of hard work until we are older. I was a smart teenage slacker. I got by in school with pretty good grades without much effort.

My life turned out OK anyway. Good job, hard worker, actually enjoy hard work. Even my formerly most hated subject, math, I now like.

Some people just need to mature. Don't force her. She will resent you and not be committed to violin or whatever else you push.

You can't make people want it. It has to come from within.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Another vote to lighten up.

One more too.

(my daughter likes to lie around watching Honey Boo Boo - I WISH there was reading involved.)