If you were training professionals on how to work with parents of kids with SN..

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

5. Get reports done on time and make sure you use the child's name, not some other child's name. If you cut and paste, make sure you described the right kid.

I have been shocked by the sloppiness of all the evaluations I have received for both my kids. Appalling! It is like proofreading has never been explained to these people. I find it even more annoying that I paid a large amount of money *out of pocket* for their sloppy work.

[Anonymous]

9:20 me too. If it is from a public school professional I am forgiving, but when I pay out of pocket, get your act together.

Also, I think some professionals feel they have earned enough of a reputation or perhaps they just have such an inflated ego that they think you are very fortunate to pay them for their time.

Another note to future gurus....Guess what? Everyone is replaceable. Maybe you were the best in your hey day, but you are only as good as your last few clients and if you start to fall asleep during appointments, appear burnt out, cannot start anything on time, don't seem to be up to date in your knowlege and/or cannot connect with my child, then I'm moving on.

*Disclaimer-most professionals I have encountered have been worthy of praise and helpful, the schmucks who have taken our money and wasted it need to read this thread.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't put up or distribute that idiotic "Trip to Holland" story.

If my child cries during every single visit, it's a sign that something isn't right. It doesn't mean that she doesn't like doctors, although she may not.

Lower your voice. Please.

Don't call me "Mom." I'm not your mother.

Be email accessible.

Don't read the chart while I'm talking, especially if you initiated what I'm saying.

Don't send in a medical student and resident after we've waited two hours and then expect that my child will submit to multiple physical exams or cooperate with you.

Be our advocate. Get a young SN child the first surgery of the day, even if it means dealing with anesthesia, radiology, and surgery. Have you dealt with expecting an underweight special needs child to fast until 2:00 in the afternoon (which means 5 by the time of the operation)?

Explain what the goals of the therapy are. Don't try something different every week hoping it will work. This is money that we might be taking from other children who don't go on vacation, or get new clothes, or a house payment.

Please be aware that our children go to school, need to go to school, and like going to school. Scheduling appointments during school time when they could and should be scheduled before/after school is insensitive. Similarly, we go to work.

Seminars and informational gatherings are great. They are not great when they are held at 9:00 in the evening when we are exhausted, have to hire babysitters we can't find, and have our children in bed. Please consider the weekends or mornings.

+1 !!!!!!!!!!!!

[Anonymous]

Don't make a prognosis for how well or not well my child will do in the future, especially if you aren't qualified to do this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't treat me like I am in denial about my DS' issues. Trust me, I'm not in denial.

I really hate that one.

Amen. I can have an accurate view of my child's current state and still have hope. I see progress every day; it doesn't mean I'm in denial.

[Anonymous]

Be thoughtful about giving advice. Think: how likely is it that this parent, who sought out my services, doesn't already know x? Phrase things respectfully "I'm sure you've thought of..." "you've probably already tried..." Because 9 times out of ten, yes, I have.

Don't give me advice that's outside your area of expertise. I don't need a speech therapist who recommends orthotics, or a pt who suspects a feeding issue or whatever... I'm surrounded by experts and get good advice in all those areas. No need for you to chime in.

If I choose not to follow your advice, respect that. I see the whole picture and that gives me knowledge you don't have. I make decisions based on the whole arc.

Know that I appreciate everything you do for my kid.

[Anonymous]

Don't roll your eyes when you suggest yet another therapy and I tell you that we can't afford it. We are not bad parents, we just really can't afford it b/c of all the money we are already paying you!!!

Don't tell me I worry too much and I should hire a babysitter to take a break. I can't afford a babysitter and how can I possibly not worry when my child has a serious neuroligical disorder?! You try having a child like mine, we'll see if you can stop worrying!

Reply to the e-mails I send you. Don' t pretend you haven't recieved an e-mail. I know you recieve and read every e-mail and just decide not to answer when you don't want to answer!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Be thoughtful about giving advice. Think: how likely is it that this parent, who sought out my services, doesn't already know x? Phrase things respectfully "I'm sure you've thought of..." "you've probably already tried..." Because 9 times out of ten, yes, I have.

Don't give me advice that's outside your area of expertise. I don't need a speech therapist who recommends orthotics, or a pt who suspects a feeding issue or whatever... I'm surrounded by experts and get good advice in all those areas. No need for you to chime in.

If I choose not to follow your advice, respect that. I see the whole picture and that gives me knowledge you don't have. I make decisions based on the whole arc.

Know that I appreciate everything you do for my kid.

Yes, it's insulting to me when someone acts like they are doing me a favor suggesting something I already do and knew. Be careful how you phrase things. Oh and then there are the people who act like they are the 1st professional we have ever seen. I gave you a stack of paperwork and shared info verbally and 3 weeks later you don't know we already get OT and we have a team of nationally known experts guiding us? If I think you are amazing you will know it. I will tell you often and put it in writing.

[Anonymous]

Don't diagnose my child when you do not have the credentials that would allow you to do so.

[Anonymous]

Don't make promises you can't keep. Don't make it sound as though you can cure my child when my child can't be cured...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't roll your eyes when you suggest yet another therapy and I tell you that we can't afford it. We are not bad parents, we just really can't afford it b/c of all the money we are already paying you!!!

Don't tell me I worry too much and I should hire a babysitter to take a break. I can't afford a babysitter and how can I possibly not worry when my child has a serious neuroligical disorder?! You try having a child like mine, we'll see if you can stop worrying!

Reply to the e-mails I send you. Don' t pretend you haven't recieved an e-mail. I know you recieve and read every e-mail and just decide not to answer when you don't want to answer!

+1 !!!!!!! An issue isn't necessarily going to get better by throwing more things at it, especially therapies that have no research supporting them. You may suggest it, but don't push it on me and how dare you roll you eyes!

Yes, Reply to the emails. I try to limit the emails. I don't call you. You have already made $8,000/10,000 probably 15,000 off me so reply to the email within 48 hours or even 24. I respect your time. I look the other way when you cheat me out of 10 minutes here and there and in return, I would like you to respond to the occasional email.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Be thoughtful about giving advice. Think: how likely is it that this parent, who sought out my services, doesn't already know x? Phrase things respectfully "I'm sure you've thought of..." "you've probably already tried..." Because 9 times out of ten, yes, I have.

Don't give me advice that's outside your area of expertise. I don't need a speech therapist who recommends orthotics, or a pt who suspects a feeding issue or whatever... I'm surrounded by experts and get good advice in all those areas. No need for you to chime in.

If I choose not to follow your advice, respect that. I see the whole picture and that gives me knowledge you don't have. I make decisions based on the whole arc.

Know that I appreciate everything you do for my kid.

Exactly. Choose your words well. Also, I have a right to only follow some of your advice. You are not GOD and sometimes you are wrong or you make a recommendation which wasn't helpful at all.

Also as PP said, don't overstep. If you are a speech therapist, it is not your place to make a pseudo-neurological diagnosis, one that our respected neurologist says is utter bullshit. You can point out something you see and ask if the neuro has given input, but guess what? You cannot practice medicine without a license, let alone make vodoo diagnosis that does not exist in the medical field. I bite my tongue or explain we already have an expert working with us, but you may one day get an client annoyed indignant enough to call your licensure board so know your limits and don't push therapies that are not proven-suggest maybe, but push-no way.

[Anonymous]

Think about what you can do to work better with a child. If a child gets frustrated with you during speech therapy, don't ask the mom for the millionth time if he gets OT. Yes, he does and he has for many years. OT has been good for many things and useless for other things.

He is tired from a full day of school and your schedule did not allow him time before seeing you. Guess what, after a full day of work, I would not want to drive to you either and have to be drilled on things that are difficult for me. Maybe if you at least allowed him to bring in a snack he could focus more.

Also, think about the successful days and what you did differently. We can tell when you are stressed out and your stress affects him. Stop throwing therapy at us we already get and start paying attention to YOU.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't make promises you can't keep. Don't make it sound as though you can cure my child when my child can't be cured...

Amen. We parents begin to fantasize so easily. If you say something like "This child is so ready to talk!" it really means something to an SN parent.