Homeless children in DC

[Anonymous]

To the PP:

Having empathy for them is enough. You don't have to know exactly what it's like.

If you knew exactly what it was like, you may find it's that much harder to be of assistance to them.

If only those who knew exactly what it was like to experience various things helped people going through those situations- they'd get a lot less help than they do now (which isn't enough in the grand scheme of things.)

As to the self serving aspect- volunteer work IS to some degree self serving. You should feel satisfaction over knowing you did the right thing, etc. Sure some of them may think of it negatively or quietly judge your motives, but many others wouldn't as with anything. And regardless of what the parents think, in that particular case its the kids who really benefit. They have little to no concept of those issues so it's not one!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do the PPs who volunteer their time ever feel a little weird about it? The few times I've done anything like that, I get this bad white-mans-burden vibe, like here I am, all white and mighty, ministering to the poor downtrodden brown kids (or adults, I've done that, too). I don't think that way about other people who volunteer. I admire them, and wish I could get over my self-consciousness. But I can't imagine how the recipients of this kind of assistance don't view it negatively on some level.

I wish there were a way I could help, besides writing checks, but I always feel like the recipients are seeing me as an intruder, a self-important do-gooder with no connection to them and their daily reality. On the one hand, I guess I don't really get what other populations go through. On the other, I believe strongly that we all need to help each other if the world is ever going to get any better. So I work for a humanitarian aid organization, in a back office, where I never come into contact with any of our aid recipients.

And now I'm rambling. But it's a sincere question that's been bothering me for a long time. I'd welcome your thoughts on how to avoid this complex. If I've explained it well enough, that is.

**cowering from the incoming flames**

No flames coming from me, PP! Those are good, honest questions. And the reality is that there are some people out there who really are "self-important do-gooders" so your concern is not unwarranted. I volunteer regularly at a tutoring house that serves poor kids, most of whom live in public housing. I think it's a good thing I'm doing but the truth is I also decided to do it completely out of self-interest! I wanted to get more engaged in my community and to meet different kinds of people. And now I feel much better connected and more at home in my neighborhood. Even though DC is Chocolate City, there is lots of de facto racial segregation here. Working with low-income Black kids has helped me, a White person who grew up in a segregated small town, feel much more at home.

It's not a bad thing to think about what you might get out of volunteering. And certainly, as has been alluded to earlier, if you don't volunteer, it's not like there is a long waiting list of people "more qualified" out there to take your place. We all do the best we can and we muddle through (we hope!). You're a good person PP, don't worry so much about how things look.

[Anonymous]

I'll ditto the PPs. I am a white/middle class/suburbanite who works as a social service provider in the heart of DC. I can't remember the last time that a white client graced my doorstep in 6 years. Yes, sometimes I get the whole, "You don't know what it is like...You are just a rich white woman..." spiel. But more often I find that if you (I) are empathetic, willing to listen, and offer a smile and kind word people are more than gracious and see past all of the exterior (race/socioeconomic/etc.) Just be genuine and it will be most appreciated. Everyone wants to be respected, hears, and cared for - regardless of where they came from.

If you are interested in offering your time as well as your check (which is always appreciated and valued too!) look into one of these service agencies and give it a whirl. Most likely you'll get just as much (if not more) out of it than those you serve.

[Anonymous]

To the poster wondering about the 'white man's burden.' I agree with what others have said, I wouldn't worry about it. Sure, there might always be people that think you don't understand/can't relate etc. BUT, there are always others that desperately need help.

A little 3 year old girl doesn't know the difference. There are always people in need... giving food to someone who's hungry, tutoring or helping with career advancement to someone who doesn't know how to, working on a hotline, giving someone change here or there, you name it.. it all makes a difference.

And you will relate and understand more than you think if you try it out. Just the fact that you're thinking about it makes you more aware than other.

There are a million and one things we can do, don't worry about how you are perceived, but don't drive yourself crazy trying to do things you might not be comfortable with. If writing a check is your way of helping, that's just fine. I think everybody can make a difference in whatever way they personally chose to.... lots of little and different things do add up to something.

And in a place like DC a lot of help is certainly needed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:do you know if you can volunteer on weekends or evenings? Would love to help out in some way but I am at work all day......

OP: You sure can. Go to their website and look under "How You can Help". Then select the first bullet "volunteer". There are many ways to get involved and you can complete the on-line application here too.

http://www.brightbeginningsinc.org/

Thank you for your interest and support!!

[zumbamama]

absolutely heart breaking, but wonderful that you are involved. I'm going to contact them and organize a fundraiser for them.