s/o- sick kids and childcare- what if your job is inflexible?

[Anonymous]

I can telework but NOT when my kid is sick. I can telework 1 day a week, but I had to sign a contract saying I would always have someone there to care for my child while I was working, or my child would be in daycare. I cannot telework and care for a sick child at the same time, that is not teleworking, that is sick leave.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can telework but NOT when my kid is sick. I can telework 1 day a week, but I had to sign a contract saying I would always have someone there to care for my child while I was working, or my child would be in daycare. I cannot telework and care for a sick child at the same time, that is not teleworking, that is sick leave.

OP here. I already said I would not be teleworking AND watching my sick kid at the same time. What I'm talking about is a scenario like this: I telework in the morning, upstairs in the office. DH is downstairs with the child. In the afternoon, we switch, so that DH is ensconced in the office doing his work and I am downstairs with the kid(s). No one is teleworking and doing child care at the same time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What you describe is not an "inflexible" job. That would be a job where you did not have any paid sick days (or you did not have the economic means to take LWOP) and if you didn't come to work you would be fired. Or, you had a huge deadline or a major deadline on the day you child was sick.

Otherwise, just use your sick days. That's what they are there for. When I say I work from home it's because my work would rather that I be available by email/phone for urgent matters rather than just fall off the grid for the day and take sick leave.

This exactly. My job is inflexible because we have deadlines that can't be moved (and you need to be in the office for) regardless if you, your child, or anyone significant in your life is sick. Once I had to call in to a telecon from a funeral. Another time I had to bring my DD with pink eye into work because I needed to prepare a delivery and I was the only one in the office who could do so. A third time I had a horrible stomach flu but still had to attend an all day meeting, I threw up twice that day at work but still couldn't go home. Calling in sick would have meant my job in every one of these cases. It sucks. Personally I think that they are crazy for wanting me to come in sick, but whatever. I have a baby on the way otherwise I would have found another job by now that is more flexible.
Days that I know that I can't miss work, I try to get DH to cover me. If he can't because he's out of town or something, I try to line up my parents. Otherwise DD comes in with me. I make it a point to know what days I absolutely need to be in the office at least a week in advance so I can make sure that I have child care coverage just in case. If I didn't have my parents, it would be a lot harder.

[Anonymous]

OP, I think a lot of people just use up their annual leave the first few years they have kids and just don't take a vacation.

[Anonymous]

i posted in response to the other thread, but we only officially have one telecommute day per week, and we're not technically supposed to have one if we're also taking sick or vacay days that week.

The rule in my group, though, is that if you're on deadline or have people depending on being responsive on email, that it's better to be working from home than not working at all. And we just bill whatever time we actually work to telework and the rest to sick.

[Anonymous]

How is everyone getting to take sick leave for their kids? I have to take vacation time as sick leave is only if I am sick.

[Anonymous]

DH and I both have executive positions and thus theoretically a lot of flexibility -- not. As other posters have said, as leaders in our offices/working environments, we have some things we cannot miss. If we have non-deadline days or days when we have a less strenuous level of work, one of us will stay home. If it's an inflexible day, we have a contract with White House Nannies and we use that for emergencies when our regular child care arrangement can't be a part of the mix. If DC has strep, WHN's parameters include that they won't come 'til the child has been on antibiotics for 24 hours -- this happened once and it was pretty horrendous for DC but also for DH and for me as we were both at deadlines or major presentations -- we split the day. For us, the issue is not whether we use sick leave (at executive level, you often have far more "earned leave" than you can use and/or if you are partner, it's a question of losing billable hours, not sick time) but how we ensure that DC is comfortable and in the best hands when we can't provide that care. It's tough and definitely is one of the "why am I doing this?" triggers that many working parents confront even when they have really great set ups and provisions as we are fortunate to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How is everyone getting to take sick leave for their kids? I have to take vacation time as sick leave is only if I am sick.

Our sick leave policy states that it can be used for your own illness or to take care of a sick child.

[Anonymous]

I resigned. I was an hourly employee who did not accrue leave as salaried employees typically do at the company. My boss would have had to terminate my employment due to one of the policies for being out of the office and not having leave to use. We were also not allowed to telecommute. My husband was also hourly at his company at that time and did not have leave to use either.

[Anonymous]

The way to deal with this is to get a nanny or an au pair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In the other thread, I keep reading about families who can share shifts of sick kid duty by teleworking from home while the other parent watches the kid, then switches off. What if your jobs are entirely inflexible when it comes to this? My job has 3 set days of telework a pay period, which is great, but if your kid is sick and you propose something like this, you get A LOT of grief b/c HR is very strict about only working 3 days from home. You can't exceed it. Does anyone have a job like this and if so, do you just call in sick completely and not try to work any amount?

OP - im not exactly sure what you are asking, after reading your subsequent posts. The split shift scenario is great if both parents have moderately busy schedules but cant afford to miss a full day of work. But its not saving anyone any sick leave in the long run. If you split 2 days or each take off one day off, its the same thing. so tell us again what your goal is? Saving sick days? Or not missing a work day?

As for me, i live close to work so DH and i often do the split shift but we each actually go into the office, no telecommuting needed. If one of us runs out of sick days, we use vacation days.

[Anonymous]

If you are desperate for child care there are emergency services through agencies you can sign up with.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In the other thread, I keep reading about families who can share shifts of sick kid duty by teleworking from home while the other parent watches the kid, then switches off. What if your jobs are entirely inflexible when it comes to this? My job has 3 set days of telework a pay period, which is great, but if your kid is sick and you propose something like this, you get A LOT of grief b/c HR is very strict about only working 3 days from home. You can't exceed it. Does anyone have a job like this and if so, do you just call in sick completely and not try to work any amount?

OP - im not exactly sure what you are asking, after reading your subsequent posts. The split shift scenario is great if both parents have moderately busy schedules but cant afford to miss a full day of work. But its not saving anyone any sick leave in the long run. If you split 2 days or each take off one day off, its the same thing. so tell us again what your goal is? Saving sick days? Or not missing a work day?

As for me, i live close to work so DH and i often do the split shift but we each actually go into the office, no telecommuting needed. If one of us runs out of sick days, we use vacation days.

Im this pp. I realize my comment may depend on your workplace policy. In my workplace, if i only work half a day, i have to take some type of leave for the other half. Is that not the case in your workplace?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The way to deal with this is to get a nanny or an au pair.

Except with an inflexible job or not able to use leave, you would still need backup for days off and sick days if your nanny/au pair called out sick or had to take emergency leave.

[Anonymous]

OP, you are very privileged and the answer to your question is obvious. Take leave and don't complain.