Sex with the lights on or off?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow, OP. My body is far from perfect and I walk around totally naked in front of my husband. He is also far from perfect and we often joke with each other about the excess baggage.

I think that your hang-up will definately put a chilling effect on your love life.

But that is the thing, my husbands body is perfect. If we were both not perfect I would be ok with that.

[Anonymous]

OP, your immature insecurities are MUCH more of a turn off than your flabby body. You need to grow up and realize that we are living in the real world and not a romance novel.

The truth is that you are only going to get older and less attractive (by swimsuit model standards) so you better get used to it or you will be alone. Trying to find a new partner with your hang ups will be impossible so you better grow up and keep your current one.

[Anonymous]

We usually have the TV on so it is kind of like dim lights. I try not to let it bother me but of course it does at times - society has made it this way!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, your immature insecurities are MUCH more of a turn off than your flabby body. You need to grow up and realize that we are living in the real world and not a romance novel.

The truth is that you are only going to get older and less attractive (by swimsuit model standards) so you better get used to it or you will be alone. Trying to find a new partner with your hang ups will be impossible so you better grow up and keep your current one.

I do not think my insecurities are immature at all. I am venting about it on here, not to my husband. My husband would not leave me over sex with the lights on or off....but thanks for your input.

[Anonymous]

The OP's insecurities are not immature. I agree with you, OP! The vast majority of people have body insecurities.

[Anonymous]

Does this mean you don't have sex during the day either?

Because usually only have sex with the lights off, but that's because I hate staring at a bright-ass, artificial light while I'm gettin it on. Daylight's a-okay.

[Anonymous]

OP, what about wearing some lingerie that makes you feel sexy? You don't have to take it off. Then you would feel pretty with the lights on.

[ThatSmileyFaceGuy]

While I know it's difficult OP, you need to remember that it's you that he WANTS to have sex with, that he is attracted to you and is turned on by you; every imperfect inch of your body he finds sexy.

[VivienneJ]

I prefer lights on.

[Anonymous]

I'm a DH and I like the lights on low. DW would keep them off, not sure why, but I want to enjoy he view.

[Anonymous]

A candle! Everything looks good in candlelight.

[Anonymous]

When I have sex with the lights on, I tend to be a chatterbox. I don't know what it is. Lights off, I jump right into the mood.

[Anonymous]

I don't like a lamp on because it winds up shining in my eyes. I don't mind day light or dimmed lighting. I just don't want to feel like a specimen on a table.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

A candle! Everything looks good in candlelight.

Yes. We have an oil lamp we like to use. It's more a glow than a light, not so harsh or bright so as to be unflattering.

[Anonymous]

Turn the lights off and use the flashlight on your iPhone.