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Friends invited us last-minute to a concert -- do we pay for our tickets?
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Anonymous
| Definitely offer. They could have easily sold them on Craigs List for face value. No need to eat tickets these days. Be a friend, OP. |
Anonymous
| I've been in the friend's shoes and can say that an offer to pay would be appreciated and likely refused. As a PP said, it's not hard to sell tickets at the last minute, especially if you are going to the show anyway. They probably did the calculation and decided your company was worth more than trying to sell them. If they do refuse, it would be nice if you picked up drinks the next time you all went out. |
Anonymous
The person doing the inviting should be clear. If they want you to pay they should say -- there are tickets available for ___...would you like to go. I know I always let people know the situation...I would never "invite" someone and expect them to pay. If I want them to pay, I say so.
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Anonymous
| You should definitely assume you are going to pay for the tickets. Ask "How MUCH do we owe you for the tickets," not "do we owe you anything." |
Anonymous
I don't think it's nervy to make it clear up front--if she had expected you to pay but said nothing until afterwards, that would have been more of a problem. |
Anonymous
|
OP,
Did you really not know how to handle this situation? |
Anonymous
| I would offer to pay for the tickets and actually insist. If they refuse insistently as well, then i'd buy drinks or pay for the parking. I think not offering is not polite - what if they are expecting to get back ticket price? Did they mention the price of ticket to you, BTW? |
Anonymous
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I agree with all PPs that saying "how much do we owe you for the tickets?" is the right way to go. Then they can say, "our treat!" and then you can go to dinner and say, "our treat!" and everyone feels good.
We have been in this situation a few times, since my MIL likes to give us gift certificates to smaller theaters. We usually prefer to see one show with friends than two shows just the two of us, and it's nice to be able to use a gift to also treat someone to a night out. |
Anonymous
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I think it depends on how the tickets were offered. I hate when people are very unclear if they are trying to sell the tickets or just use them. THey should have been very upfront about the ticket price if they wanted you to pay. The problem with offering after the fact - what if you can't afford them? Maybe this isn't an issue. But we tend to attend events only if we can get inexpensive tickets.
I do think its probably good ettiquite to offer to give money, but personally, I always try to ask beforehand. But money it tight for us. |
Anonymous
Agree with this. |
Anonymous
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OP here. Thanks for all of the feedback, this is helpful. I will go with my husband's plan and put a check for the tickets in with our thank you note -- which, I agree, we should already have sent! (We have the actual tickets with the price printed on them, so we already know what they cost.) We did pay for parking and drinks for the four of us when we went out.
And no, I honestly didn't know what to do in this situation. I remember it was quite common for my parents and their friends (in the pre-Craig's list era) to give away tickets that they weren't going to be able to use, without expecting reimbursement. I have asked friends to go to the theater with me and expected them to pay for their own tickets, but in that case we always pick the show, and the date, together. If someone else picks the show (not anything I might have picked for myself), and the evening, and gives me just a few hours notice to arrange babysitting and get myself organized to go out, and then expects me to pay my own way as well, then that doesn't feel like such a wonderful invitation. I know I would never make a similar offer, and expect to be reimbursed. As it happened, it was great show and a very enjoyable evening, and, as several posters pointed out, if we can afford the tickets there is no reason not to make the offer to pay, so that's what we will do. |
Anonymous
| PS. I should have said that the invitation was not at all clear about whether they were expecting to be reimbursed. |
Anonymous
But OP, if they intended to treat you, this would be awkward. Why not call and ask, "what do we owe you for the tickets?" Then they can say either it's on them, or tell you the price. |
Anonymous
Yes! Listen to the above PP and pls follow several posters' advice to ask "How much do we owe you for the tickets?" Sending a check is not the way to go, it has the potential to put your friends in an awkward position. |
Anonymous
agree |