Did FCPS fail Nick Stuban?

[Anonymous]

I've worked with four high school students from FCPS who were expelled for (in my eyes) just making stupid choices. Not a danger to anyone, not doing anything that would result in a felony charge, just challenging the black and white rules of a broken system which is what many teenagers do.

The FCPS hearings, the way the children (and they are still children, just in big bodies) are treated, the way the parents are treated is brutal. The entire family feels like a failure and is ostracized by the "perfect" families.

For those parents who believe that the Zero Tolerance Policy is the best thing since sliced bread, please remember that this can happen to any family.

Luckily, the small independent schools in the area give the kids a second chance and use the incident as a teachable moment. But the family has to survive the FCPS judgment process first.

Very sad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've worked with four high school students from FCPS who were expelled for (in my eyes) just making stupid choices. Not a danger to anyone, not doing anything that would result in a felony charge, just challenging the black and white rules of a broken system which is what many teenagers do.

The FCPS hearings, the way the children (and they are still children, just in big bodies) are treated, the way the parents are treated is brutal. The entire family feels like a failure and is ostracized by the "perfect" families.

For those parents who believe that the Zero Tolerance Policy is the best thing since sliced bread, please remember that this can happen to any family.

Luckily, the small independent schools in the area give the kids a second chance and use the incident as a teachable moment. But the family has to survive the FCPS judgment process first.

Very sad.

Very well said.

[Anonymous]

Today's Washington Post article has further details. My heart just breaks for the family.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2011/02/19/AR2011021904528.html

[Anonymous]

People from all over the country have read and are reading of this tragedy. There are now well over two hundred comments, all of them incredulous at the school board's Mubarak style of justice. As far as I know, Fairfax County is in the US. When did it forget?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People from all over the country have read and are reading of this tragedy. There are now well over two hundred comments, all of them incredulous at the school board's Mubarak style of justice. As far as I know, Fairfax County is in the US. When did it forget?

I am hoping that a new School Board will rid FCPS of Jack Dale.

[Anonymous]

This is heartbreaking. I was unfamiliar with this situation before reading the WaPo article. If this were my son and family I would sue them--the county, the board, the school, the principal the counselor--all of them. This kid did not buy an illegal substance and was not given due process by the school system. His constitutional rights were taken away. His life was DESTROYED. I cannot believe parents in the community are not up in arms about the reckless judgement by educators in positions of authority.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is heartbreaking. I was unfamiliar with this situation before reading the WaPo article. If this were my son and family I would sue them--the county, the board, the school, the principal the counselor--all of them. This kid did not buy an illegal substance and was not given due process by the school system. His constitutional rights were taken away. His life was DESTROYED. I cannot believe parents in the community are not up in arms about the reckless judgement by educators in positions of authority.

I completely agree this statement. Who's to say that it is necessarily the school board's job to prosecute and punish kids for using drugs anyway? It seems more like they're punishing morals more than anything, and is more of a function of which lobbying group, special interest group, and angry mob of mothers can influence legislation and the school system more than another. Congratulations, through all of your pitchforks and flaming torches, you have just murdered one of your own, somebody who will never come back, and make no mistake, the blood is on your hands, this was completely preventable and avoidable. People need to realize that excessive rules cause more problems than they solve, and that everybody is entitled to a modicum of privacy and civil liberties. I apologize if I've offended anybody, but I case like this boils my blood, and just makes me wonder why things have to be this way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is heartbreaking. I was unfamiliar with this situation before reading the WaPo article. If this were my son and family I would sue them--the county, the board, the school, the principal the counselor--all of them. This kid did not buy an illegal substance and was not given due process by the school system. His constitutional rights were taken away. His life was DESTROYED. I cannot believe parents in the community are not up in arms about the reckless judgement by educators in positions of authority.

I completely agree this statement. Who's to say that it is necessarily the school board's job to prosecute and punish kids for using drugs anyway? It seems more like they're punishing morals more than anything, and is more of a function of which lobbying group, special interest group, and angry mob of mothers can influence legislation and the school system more than another. Congratulations, through all of your pitchforks and flaming torches, you have just murdered one of your own, somebody who will never come back, and make no mistake, the blood is on your hands, this was completely preventable and avoidable. People need to realize that excessive rules cause more problems than they solve, and that everybody is entitled to a modicum of privacy and civil liberties. I apologize if I've offended anybody, but I case like this boils my blood, and just makes me wonder why things have to be this way.

ITA! And this is in the "world-class" Fairfax County Public Schools system! It just sickens me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I grew up under a zero tolerance policy, we even had guilt by association (i.e. you at a party where there was drinking but where not, you could still be removed from the sports team and other after school activities). Kids/teens need to learn there are consequences in life (i.e. you break the rules, something happens). They do not like it but that is the fact of life. Teens maybe dumb but why is that an excuse to not have the full consequences that have been set forth up held. I think it is a shame that his boy took his own life but he could have done it for another reason later on down the road.

He broke no rules; just a tragedy that should have been seen through and avoided all together. You are holding 14-16 yr old to much stiffer consequences than the adults judging them. A sports team is a priveledge and that is different. Developing a kid in a school system, a public system and removing them from that is just blind. Do we have teachers and administrators abide by the same standards of conduct - one strike your out -

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I grew up under a zero tolerance policy, we even had guilt by association (i.e. you at a party where there was drinking but where not, you could still be removed from the sports team and other after school activities). Kids/teens need to learn there are consequences in life (i.e. you break the rules, something happens). They do not like it but that is the fact of life. Teens maybe dumb but why is that an excuse to not have the full consequences that have been set forth up held. I think it is a shame that his boy took his own life but he could have done it for another reason later on down the road.

He broke no rules; just a tragedy that should have been seen through and avoided all together. You are holding 14-16 yr old to much stiffer consequences than the adults judging them. A sports team is a priveledge and that is different. Developing a kid in a school system, a public system and removing them from that is just blind. Do we have teachers and administrators abide by the same standards of conduct - one strike your out -

Of course he broke the rules. It doesn't matter if the substance he bought was legal or not. The bottom line is that he bought it on school property and that is definitely against the rules. And it's not that he bought it thinking it is powdered sugar or something. He bought it with the express purpose of getting high. The last time I checked, owning a gun is legal, but that doesn't mean anyone can bring a gun to school. To shrug this off saying he just made a stupid mistake is a slap in the face of the other 99% students who diligently follow the rules.

Having said that, I feel that the hearing committee should have taken it a little easy with him considering his family situation. He definitely had depression issues going on without the suspension and school transfer. The school transfer was probably the last straw. He did break the rules and served a suspension. That should have been punishment enough for a first time offense, unless there are other issues that are not made public. Feel terrible for the family.

[Anonymous]

I am hoping that a new School Board will rid FCPS of Jack Dale.

+1 on this.

[Anonymous]

This is a heartbreaking story. It does sound as if Nick had some depression issues going on before this which contributed to his downward spiral.
I don't think the hearings should be so hostile, what a horrible experience for any child and family to go through.
That being said, would being transferred to another school really have been so horrible for Nick?
He was a good kid who made a mistake, wouldn't this have given him a chance to start over?

[Anonymous]

This is a heartbreaking story. It does sound as if Nick had some depression issues going on before this which contributed to his downward spiral.
I don't think the hearings should be so hostile, what a horrible experience for any child and family to go through.
That being said, would being transferred to another school really have been so horrible for Nick?
He was a good kid who made a mistake, wouldn't this have given him a chance to start over?

I think you're looking at this through the eyes of a mature adult. Unfortunately teenagers aren't mature and they aren't adults. For a kid with a painful home life, moving schools and leaving behind your entire universe of friends and familiar adults could be devastating. This was a kid who obviously had loving, attentive parents, but I can't imagine how hard it must be as a teenager to watch your mother slowly degenerate as a result of a fatal condition. That factor alone should have warranted extremely careful treatment by the school system. Add to this the other facts brought out in the Post articles - that the substance he bought was not illegal, that he'd never had a discipline problem before, that he didn't take anything on school grounds, that he sobbed through his hearing while being berated by the administrators. That's just nuts. There is nothing defensible about the way the school handled this case. I don't live in FFX and I don't know anything about the policy per se, but I'm willing to believe it's not an isolated case. Either way, the horrifying, unnecessary outcome of the Stuban case should prompt the school system to voluntarily reconsider its policy. It's just sad that it's taken a lawsuit from the family to even publicize the issue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I grew up under a zero tolerance policy, we even had guilt by association (i.e. you at a party where there was drinking but where not, you could still be removed from the sports team and other after school activities). Kids/teens need to learn there are consequences in life (i.e. you break the rules, something happens). They do not like it but that is the fact of life. Teens maybe dumb but why is that an excuse to not have the full consequences that have been set forth up held. I think it is a shame that his boy took his own life but he could have done it for another reason later on down the road.

He broke no rules; just a tragedy that should have been seen through and avoided all together. You are holding 14-16 yr old to much stiffer consequences than the adults judging them. A sports team is a priveledge and that is different. Developing a kid in a school system, a public system and removing them from that is just blind. Do we have teachers and administrators abide by the same standards of conduct - one strike your out -

FCPS is extremely lenient with employees. It seems anything is OK but drugs/sex with students. A principal did stuff [had systems person hack FCPS system to get personal info on the FCPS employee husband was involved with]. FCPS just reassigned to central offices and then sent across the county for a fresh start. Meanwhile she also was the famous no-hugs:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2007/06/17/AR2007061701179_pf.html



One allowed illegal dumping by a sports booster on the Potomac watershed. 200 dump trucks through a parking lot by the gym and football field:
http://www.connectionnewspapers.com/article.asp?article=240699&paper=65&cat=104

Football teams are large and staff is the in the summer.

[Anonymous]

Its is not the school board or any other public body to raise a child. The morals etc are the parents job. Why is it ok for this kid to get some sort of special treatment because his family life isnt Leave it to Beaver perfect? Whose is?

I have brought 3 kids through the FCPS school system and while I firmly believe the public school systems throughout our nation are failing our kids educationally, its not their responsibility to make your kid behave the way he should. THAT is the parents'. Is it horrible they lost their child? Yes. Did they get him help? Was he in counseling for his issues at home that also contributed to his suicide? Who really failed this kid?

I for one think this family will only do more harm than good in suing the FCPS. More money from the other kids who ARE doing the right thing very single day. I managed to raise three kids without any of them being suspended after they lived through the suicide of their mother. FCPS sure as hell doesnt get a pat on the back for it.