Realized I just don’t like my house

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We live in a city apartment so it's not exactly the same scenario, but we decided to scratch a plan to move to the suburbs and hired a decorator to help us reinvent the space we already had. We did not take down walls or do any major construction, but we did paint everything, replace most of our furniture, rugs, window treatment, and lighting fixtures. The end result changed the way we used rooms, created more efficient storage opportunities, and was magazine-layout beautiful to boot.

No, it was not a cheap fix. But it cost less than moving, and ten years later I have zero regrets about our choices.

Can you say more about this? I'm curious how those changes made a difference in how the rooms are used.

[Anonymous]

Yeah I worry that this is really a personality thing. I've living in 1100sqft and now 2200 sqft and we have people over all the time ( at least a couple times a week).

Maybe you just need a couple spaces that you love, like a dining table to sit around, or some porch furniture.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We live in a city apartment so it's not exactly the same scenario, but we decided to scratch a plan to move to the suburbs and hired a decorator to help us reinvent the space we already had. We did not take down walls or do any major construction, but we did paint everything, replace most of our furniture, rugs, window treatment, and lighting fixtures. The end result changed the way we used rooms, created more efficient storage opportunities, and was magazine-layout beautiful to boot.

No, it was not a cheap fix. But it cost less than moving, and ten years later I have zero regrets about our choices.

Can you say more about this? I'm curious how those changes made a difference in how the rooms are used.

Changing furniture size, the number of pieces, and layouts; repurposing the rarely-used dining room and guest room to be a more flexible spaces; built-ins to solve some storage problems and make use of "empty spaces;" lighting, paint colors, and wallpaper choices that made the space more inviting and added charm and ambiance. And in the end, making it truly beautiful made a bigger difference than you might think.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yeah I worry that this is really a personality thing. I've living in 1100sqft and now 2200 sqft and we have people over all the time ( at least a couple times a week).

Maybe you just need a couple spaces that you love, like a dining table to sit around, or some porch furniture.

Sometimes it’s the layout, flow and natural light (or lack of).

I’ve been in 1,000 sq ft condos that are a dream for entertainment, and 2,000 sq ft townhomes that are dark/feel closed-in and don’t have a good flow for entertaining.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Mortgage rate drives a lot of this decision.

If your rate is 3-4% or so and you can cash flow the renovation, stay.

If your rate is higher, consider a move instead of a reno.

10000%. People who bought below 5% pre 2024 ish don’t understand how a 6 something rate impacts affordability. Even before COVID, rates were below 5% for the 15 or so years prior.

At 6.5% you’re still looking at $5.5K ish PITI on $750K financed assuming OP puts 50% down on $1.5M

[Anonymous]

Agree this needs to be cost driven. We were in almost the same exact situation- house not good for entertaining, busy street, wanted to stay in the neighborhood. Even if we upgraded we were never going to be able to get the things we really wanted (garage, less busy street) so we waited until something opened up a few blocks away and bought it, for about the same price as a remodel would have cost us. BUT - this was before interest rates went up so much.

So short answer: moving is probably the only thing to solve all your issues. But it creates a new one with a higher mortgage. Which poison do you prefer?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hate our house. I hate it when we bought it. I still hate it, 15 years later. To get the three things I want that would make me happy, we would have to pay like a million dollars more. Doesn't make financial sense. So I just am stuck in this house that I hate.

We are pretty much stuck in our house until at least retirement, so trying to make it work.

What we want: one level or main bedroom on the first floor, just does not seem available in this area; when we were looking they were snapped up immediately for prices we couldn't pay. It is what it is at this point.

[Anonymous]

I would say if you are living in a $1M+ home, it probably is very nice to entertain in.

I live in a 2BDR condo and I NEVER have people over due to space issues……

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mortgage rate drives a lot of this decision.

If your rate is 3-4% or so and you can cash flow the renovation, stay.

If your rate is higher, consider a move instead of a reno.

10000%. People who bought below 5% pre 2024 ish don’t understand how a 6 something rate impacts affordability. Even before COVID, rates were below 5% for the 15 or so years prior.

At 6.5% you’re still looking at $5.5K ish PITI on $750K financed assuming OP puts 50% down on $1.5M

All true, but renovating in the way OP means - taking out walls, adding space - is s giant PITA as well as expensive. We did it and moving would have been a better bang for our buck. And faster.

OP, why don't you resolve to host at least three events in your house in what's left of 2026? Make yourself do it and then after each one decide whether it was fun and, if not, whether the house was the problem. After three you will know whether to stay or move, or whether maybe you just dislike hosting.

[Anonymous]

Only bought our house around the end of 2024 and have felt a lot of buyers remorse since then. First time home buyer and feel like the things I was thinking about when looking may be a bit different than some of things I’d look for now, also feel like our house dropped in value and the buyers market has been stronger with more options since we bought.

The thought is sort of fading. Also had some big issues in the beginning but addressed them, making some improvements and generally feeling OK. Love our neighborhood and neighbors too which is important.

Also realizing with our budget it’s not like we could find something that would really check every single box in this area.

[Anonymous]

How will you feel if you spend a bunch of money to buy a new house and you still don't end up entertaining people? I have friends who love to entertain and they have frequent parties in tiny spaces. I rarely have guests because my bathrooms are ancient but I'm not sure I would want to host all the time anyway.

So before you spend a ton of money, make sure you are being realistic about what you really want.