If you are not financially well off, should you discourage moving away for college?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sometimes more distant schools could be cheaper. I’d focus more on overall cost (including travel) than merely distance.

Correct.

[Anonymous]

Travel cost is a drop in the bucket compared to total cost. Focus on the net prices after financial aid and/or merit scholarships. If you are getting full need-based aid, there will be some consideration for travel costs built in. See the estimated total cost of attendance.

Aim for private colleges that meet full need, and your state universities. If your kid might be able to get a top score on the PSAT, that is worth trying for, as there may be some full ride merit available.

There are always kids on campus during, say, Thanksgiving break who didn't have the time or money to get home. If you are close enough, there may be buses. Look at the options and their costs for any particular college, but the college itself needs to be affordable first.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sometimes more distant schools could be cheaper. I’d focus more on overall cost (including travel) than merely distance.

This. And living on campus is cheaper in many parts of the country than living in DMV.

I would pay extra to have kid live on campus. It’s a critical part of the experience.

[Anonymous]

If there are relatives near the college your kid is considering, your kid can go there for some of the shorter breaks? I would not recommend having your kid live with relatives for college to save money, no matter how great your relationship with them may be, however. Less there’s no other way they can attend that college. I’ve seen relationships sour in a couple of those situations where the kid feels restricted/limited in their college experience by the host relative.

[Anonymous]

I agree with the PP that suggested colleges on Amtrak or even a direct bus route. Even though it is in the middle of nowhere, our kids school has direct bus routes to all of the bigger towns/cities in the region.
I would say that a 4-8 hour bus or train ride is reasonable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We would not be able to afford without saving, things like flights home nor are we financially in a place to add an additional vehicle for taking to school.

Would you discourage going away for college?

No college student needs a car. I'd focus on the overall cost of a college. Financial aid and merit awards are variable with every school. But in the big scheme of things, a few hundred dollars for plane/train/bus is nothing when all these schools have price tags between $40,000-$100,000 per year. I'd certainly choose a school further away if it gave great financial aid or merit awards.

[Anonymous]

DCUM sometimes does not remember that some families really are genuinely on a very tight budget.

1. If budget is tight, attending a local affordable college (probably public) while living at home is ok. Many families do this.

1B. Only if it is within budget, try to let DC live on campus 1st year so they can make friends and maybe join a study group.

1C. Budget for the commute travel costs if a commuter student living at home. Car or no car? Parking permit fee if a car? How much is the bus/metro ride?

2. Students attending college away from home do not need a car if budget does not allow.

3. Lots of kids without a car at college are dropped off by parent at start of semester and picked up by parent at end of the semester. Ditto for Thanksgiving or Spring Break.

3B. Some colleges will be easier for student to travel to/from a remote college for the semester and for breaks.

Arbitrary examples of easier: Randolph-Macon College in Ashland is across the street from the Amtrak station with several trains daily to/from DC. UVa is only a few blocks from the Amtrak station with maybe 2 trains each way daily to/from DC. VCU is a taxi ride away from the downtown Richmond Amtrak.

Arbitrary examples of harder: JMU has no train service and limited scheduled bus service. Hampden-Sydney has no good scheduled bus or train service.

4. Students from non-wealthy families need a degree that RELIABLY will get them a job paying enough to support themselves right after graduation. Student cannot pick any field they like for their degree in tight financial circumstances. This might be sad, but is the budgetary reality for many families. If budgets are really tight, one needs to be reality based.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree with the PP that suggested colleges on Amtrak or even a direct bus route. Even though it is in the middle of nowhere, our kids school has direct bus routes to all of the bigger towns/cities in the region.
I would say that a 4-8 hour bus or train ride is reasonable.

Pittsburgh should have an Amtrak route still (although the hours are awkward). Lots of colleges there: CMU, Pitt, Duquesne, etc.

Pitt has holiday bus transportation to DC.

https://www.pc.pitt.edu/mobility/shuttle-services/buses-home

Cleveland is also on the Amtrak route to DC.

I was used to going to school with international undergrads and students who rarely go home. Look for schools that have clear alternate arrangements for kids who stay on campus over minor breaks. And also assistance for kids who may need emergency help. My kid's state flagship has a food pantry to help students with thin budgets. Look at FGLI programs if that helps.

Do you have internet and Facetime/Zoom? My kid is one hour's drive away at college but during freshman year, we tried to let him get established so mostly used web calls.

My grandmother grew up as a foster kid/orphanage kid. Her brother hitchhiked to college (from Binghamton, NY to Ohio) to get to a school that gave him a scholarship. I sympathize with your situation. But make sure you don't suboptimize your kid's school choice out of fear. Keep asking questions. Try the University Reddits if DCUM doesn't have info. The school kids might also trade info on school-specific YikYak or Fizz social media sites (I am not familiar with those but have heard of them).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Living on campus is a huge waste of money in general.

Except for growth, independence, autonomy, adulting, - yup total waste.

I lived at home for most of my college years, and I learned how to do all this just fine because my parents largely left me alone, and I was out all day.

OP, you said you don't have a credit card, but I assume you can get prepaid cards. That could be used to purchase travel tickets.

Agree with a PP, if your kid gets a ton of financial/merit aid from a college far away, paying for travel may still end up cheaper overall (just logistics would be a PIA).

[Anonymous]

I would concentrate on overall cost, but it is helpful and usually less costly to go in state or nearby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If there are relatives near the college your kid is considering, your kid can go there for some of the shorter breaks? I would not recommend having your kid live with relatives for college to save money, no matter how great your relationship with them may be, however. Less there’s no other way they can attend that college. I’ve seen relationships sour in a couple of those situations where the kid feels restricted/limited in their college experience by the host relative.

My DS visits nearby relatives fairly often. He would never say it, but I do believe it gives him a feeling of comfort and security.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We would not be able to afford without saving, things like flights home nor are we financially in a place to add an additional vehicle for taking to school.

Would you discourage going away for college?

I would highly suggest that if you are financially precarious, as we have been previously (not have 6mo emergency funds, possibly living paycheck to paycheck) that you NOT commit to a college that you cannot reasonably drive to in the car you own at the time.

So no, do not commit to a school that you cannot easily fund (without hardship) getting that kid back in an emergency situation. Covid, injury, natural disaster or more mundane things like a kid’s poor planning, lack of friends near you for rides, insane fuel costs driving up bus prices- these all affect you financially in an unpredictable way.

However, there are high-end schools with great financial aid programs that can include stipends for traveling to and fro (whether they cover the actual cost or just lump you some random amount is another story.). So don’t cross anything off the list until you see the offer but also don’t get your kid’s hopes up.

We are a $200k earning household in a low cost of living area (so “rich” for here) and are sending our kid a plane-ride away to a school that considers our income to be “low” enough for ~50% off aid but not low enough for travel stipends. This travel will be adding a few thousand dollars a year that we cannot use a 529 plan to pay. With everything having increased in price ~100% in the last 5 years this “few thousand” that should be no big deal has been added to by the “few thousand” increase in our car ins & home ins, joined by the “few thousand” increase in food costs and the “few thousand” increase in gas costs and now we are at an increase in spending of ~ $15k a year.

We are old, so we cannot assume that our income will increase over his college journey if you are young maybe that is another factor to consider.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are in the northeast and amtrak is very affordable when you purchase in advance. We looked at schools that were accessible by train. Many schools we looked at kids have cars, sometimes need cars especially for schools where kids move off campus for upperclassman years. Kids often have cars at schools like cornell/Ithaca bc it's not easy to get home, etc. I intentionally guided my kid away from schools where kids tend to have cars. We are a city family and purchasing/insuring a car isn't part of our budget. We have lots of friends with kids at schools where you need to fly. Traveling home for holidays is often peak pricing. Thanksgiving, Xmas, etc.

You don’t need to have a car at Cornell. Many kids take the bus back to the DMV. You are steering your kid with inaccurate information.

We are in nyc, and the cornell run bus that goes to the upper east side is very expensive and books up quickly. Bus departure times to port authority are restrictive. Most suburban kids we know bring a car year 2. Nyc kids take the expensive cornell bus, have parents with cars who pick them up or get rides to with suburban friends who keep cars on campus. And it's a long, boring drive. Every family is different. I prefer schools in cities serviced by amtrak, and there are so many amazing schools along that route!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Living on campus is a huge waste of money in general.

Except for growth, independence, autonomy, adulting, - yup total waste.

I come from Europe where most kids don’t go away for college. We’ve been adulting just fine.

Spending 4 years at an all inclusive in your parents’ dime is not adulting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Living on campus is a huge waste of money in general.

Except for growth, independence, autonomy, adulting, - yup total waste.

I come from Europe where most kids don’t go away for college. We’ve been adulting just fine.

Spending 4 years at an all inclusive in your parents’ dime is not adulting.

If you haven’t realized the difference between child rearing practices in the US compared to Europe then you haven’t fully acclimated. Surely you know our kids are far more coddled here than a child raised in Hamburg. And that’s why so many of our coeds go away to college as a rite of passage.