Do clocks help time blindness?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Clocks and timers don't help with time blindness with my college aged kid because he perceives things will take far less time then they do.

If I tell him we need to leave at 2pm and to set an alarm to get ready, he will set it for 1:30 thinking it is enough time for him to shower/dress/get groomed, finish up laundry, have a snack, and text with his GF.

*spoiler - he takes 20m showers so even just getting ready isn't feasible.*

I can't tell you the number of times we have left without him.

PP with 18yo now. 16yo did the same thing. Because she also has ODD/possible BPD, arguing just made it worse. Instead, we changed the paradigm by separating drive time from prep time, making a list of prep activities and timing out each prep activity. She only wrote down prep time after averaging out a dozen times she did each activity (and since she had to notify me that she was going to time, it took over a month to do the whole list), but it made a huge difference once she knew how long it would really take. She now sets a timer on her phone before she starts each part of prep, each one saved in her phone, and it makes everything so much easier for her.

[Anonymous]

Make a (very) visual list of the sequential order to hang, for example, on the bathroom mirror, so it's easy to see that after combing hair she still has A. B, C. D, and E to do.
Try doing this with a count down (again visual) clock.

It's more effective than a digital clock with a set abstract amt of time.

Also, proactively preparing helps. All non perishables set out prior. Water botte filled and in back pack. Clothes set out (which is know they can spontaneously change their mind the morning of, but if everything else is set that should be only 1 battle instead of more), for example.

[Anonymous]

An Alexa can also help move them along. You can schedule countdown timers, reminders,etc.

My ADHD husband has made tremendous improvements with technology. But it also took things like me showing him over and over that he simply isn’t capable of getting ready in 30 minutes. And that if he would like to get to church on time, he needs to assume 45 minutes of getting ready AND another 15 minutes of getting kids ready. He would not build in the kid time and I was pretty much like “F this. I’m not doing it all so you can add time or we can not go.”

We were recently super late to something for his family, because he has yet to grasp what our ADHD teen daughter needs to be able to leave at a certain time. And I’m just like “whatever.” He was pretty panicked. But (as I had predicted in my own head), his whole ADHD family was late too so it didn’t matter.

But honestly, he is on time the vast majority of the time. He uses alarms on his phone. And we talk through the schedule each weekend and he puts everything in.

My family on the other hand generally arrives 30 minutes early, which makes my hsuband totally insane.