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I totally get it, OP. The larger world is a scary place right now. I would lose my mind if I focused on it so I'm focusing on how I can make my own little part of the world a good place:
--Volunteering in my community --Being a good daughter and mother --Maintaining dear friendships --Loving my husband and continuing to work on our long marriage --Doing work in my career that I'm proud of |
| I think I had an existential crisis last night. Some things are happening in life right now that are transitional, and it is really highlighting to me how fast life goes. It just seems bizarre to me that I’m having memories of a time and place, and that those memories are memories. It feels like all of it was just yesterday. Where the hell did the time go? And that feeling lead leads me to the question of how much time is left? I’m only 55, but it’s really striking me that I’m no longer in the time of life where everything is still possible. The memories that are coming up are just really reminding me of how much is passed. And it feels quite bizarre. Just yesterday I was 32 and meeting my husband. Just yesterday I was 32 and starting my legal career. Just yesterday I was 40 and we were celebrating my birthday in Venice. Just yesterday we got our dog, as a puppy, who is now grey. Just yesterday we got married on a beach in Hawaii. But all of this was not just yesterday. It feels overwhelming and confusing, and I’m not sure why it’s hitting me now. |
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I got completely thrown by finding out that apparently some viral video things I discovered a few days ago and have been watching are largely fake and generated by AI.
I thought I was somewhat more discerning, but maybe not. Also, though, it was just entertainment, I wasn't republishing anything or writing a thesis. I've only had one potential porch pirate, one day there was a stack of packages inside a clear plastic bag that I didn't have time to grab. When I came home the bag had blown a few feet and the packages were outside in the snow. Turned out they were the 200lbs of weights my kid ordered. Apparently interested persons tried to lift them and said "forget this" and moved on Fwiw it's the porch pirate videos where they take a box that explodes with glitter/paint/poop/ rainbow paint, often all over and into their vehicles. |