College kids and money
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Anonymous
OP-I am really torn. We could easily give him more money because he picked a college that gave him incredible amounts of merit aid, reducing tuition to a very small amount. But I am concerned that if we give him more, he will never learn to budget...Or maybe giving him a bit more will enable him to save? I am really not sure what to do here. We could easily up the allowance to $200 v. $100/mo BUT I would be pretty annoyed if he spent it on silly things. |
Anonymous
Yes, this. And during the school year. I pay a certain amount for groceries, rent, books and utilities (he has an off campus apartment) but he pays for everything else, including trips to visit friends or dinners out, etc. He recently mentioned that he thinks he should/could start paying for regular items he buys at Target like toothpaste and for his books for school (he's a good kid about expenses.) I'm always surprised that it is not true for most kids? |
Anonymous
Why don't you ask him to put together a monthly budget of what he needs money for and then agree on what kind if things you will pay for...that way you can tell if he has legitimate expenses that are not covered and be clear with him of the kind of expensese you do not think you need to cover....(my kid did this the first semester this year when he was in an off campus apartment for the first time. we were able to agree on an estimated amount for food.) |
Anonymous
He was responsible enough to be a great student. Probably give him the benefit of the of the doubt now. And sure, they're going to buy a silly halloween costume or a holiday decoration or something we find unnecessary but isn't that part of the experience of college? (as you said you can afford the spending money) |
Anonymous
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We give our college kid an "allowance" that is meant to cover food (he doesn't have a meal plan), some gas, and necessities like toiletries, etc. We worked it out together and that's what he gets every month. Even though he might spend less if we just let him use our credit card, we want him to understand budgeting and saving etc.
When he gets to junior or senior year, we'll probably give him the same amount in a lump sum for each semester -again, to help him with budgeting and making sure he understands how money works. We wouldn't do it if we couldn't afford it but we can. And the amount really depends on where your kid goes to school - he goes to school near a city so it can sometimes be expensive. He also works and he uses that money for going out with friends, taking trips with friends, stuff for his girlfriend etc. |
Anonymous
| We give our DDs way too much based on this thread. |
Anonymous
Us too. DS lives off campus and we give him $200 a week. I have been to his nearby grocery stood and food is expensive. We don’t need to force him to make pasta every night. He does work about 12 hours a week at the school and uses that for recreation like Spring Break, road trips to away games. Not that this factored into the equation but his tuition is free due to scholarship and he lives in a house. With 4 friends so rent is cheap. He has done well in school and worked during summer since freshman year of high school. I don’t feel he doesn’t know how to budget and there is plenty of money both in his 529 and just our circumstances in general. Based on this thread I know I am going to get blasted but it feels like the right amount for us. Yes, he has built up some of his savings by using our money but I don’t feel it’s a problem. He graduates in May on-time. |
Anonymous
I don't know why people (who can afford it) were fine spending "silly" money on their high schooler, but 6 months later they cut the kid off. |
Anonymous
For me the difference is he was working so it was his money. Now he's not working so it's just allowance money. But again, not sure how to handle: I read only 40% of college kids work. I always worked and so did dh: both on campus during the year and during part of the summer at a different job. So aside from housing everything was my responsibility financially. My parents could have helped more but did not. Now I can help more than my parents could have helped but it feels like spoiling and entitlement, though again, since only 40% of college kids work that means most do not work and parents must subsidize fun spending as well. |
Anonymous
| We give my college senior $200 a month since he lives in an apartment and has no meal plan. We pay tuition and rent and do provide a car (insurance and gas). He uses money earned over the summer for entertainment, eating out, dates, etc. I’m happy to buy essential clothing but he always insists he needs nothing. When he lived in the dorm, instead of the $200 a month, we paid for the meal plan. |
Anonymous
I wanted to add that our younger son will be off to college in the fall and we will do the same thing but I suspect he will struggle with budgeting. He spends money as soon as he gets it and is not good at planning. |
Anonymous
| I have no idea how my freshman son uses his Amex Platinum card because his wealthy grandfather takes care of the bill. |
Anonymous
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^ yikes, scary
or a made-up response? |
Anonymous
| We found College Board's info by college on spending money/expenses spot-on |
Anonymous
| Back in the 2000s I got 1000 a week I could imagine it should be higher now |