Is vacation time off in same year as parental leave frowned upon?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well it's assumed that you'd use up all your vacation time before parental leave starts - in fact I think that might even be a requirement at my company.

I'm the 16:28 poster. This is definitely not standard. Not true at either my company or my husband's company.

If you are taking FMLA it is pretty standard. No paid leave where I work. First they take all your vacation days, then sick days, then you are unpaid.

Yeah, that’s awful but I know it’s common.

I think where people have paid parental leave, it is common to retain vacation days. Whether it’s frowned upon would depend on the company culture. Not frowned upon at my place or work or my spouse’s.

This was my experience. OP, you may also want to save at least a few days of leave for when your baby gets sick or your childcare is closed.

[Anonymous]

Like, you took the parental leave in 2025 and you’re wondering if you can take a 2 week vacation in 6 or 7 months? It would never even cross my mind to question this.

[Anonymous]

You can take vacation leave this summer. You earned it.

While many people exhaust their leave to extend their paid parental leave, savvy/lucky people sit on some PTO so they have it available when they return.

Everyone goes on vacation during the summer. If your husband works somewhere that might be annoyed, then he shouldn’t flag it immediately and should try to take leave when it doesn’t inconvenience anyone.

[Anonymous]

Of course you can, your leave is yours to take. You should save at least a week or two though to cover the sick days when you go back to work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:IMO the optics are bad for him to take off 16 weeks paid, but he’s entitled to it so might as well take it.

Maybe, but if it’s bad for optics at work to take paid time off for family, I’d say it’s worse optics for your family to put work first and NOT take the time. I’d be livid if my spouse didn’t take parental leave to which he was entitled.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well it's assumed that you'd use up all your vacation time before parental leave starts - in fact I think that might even be a requirement at my company.

I'm the 16:28 poster. This is definitely not standard. Not true at either my company or my husband's company.

If you are taking FMLA it is pretty standard. No paid leave where I work. First they take all your vacation days, then sick days, then you are unpaid.

Yeah, that’s awful but I know it’s common.

I think where people have paid parental leave, it is common to retain vacation days. Whether it’s frowned upon would depend on the company culture. Not frowned upon at my place or work or my spouse’s.

This was my experience. OP, you may also want to save at least a few days of leave for when your baby gets sick or your childcare is closed.

I was going to say this. Maybe you have separate sick leave, but just something to keep in the back of your mind.

But apart from that, take your leave!!

[Anonymous]

Who cares? He's legally entitled to the time. He should take it. Stop listening to corporate boot lickers who would rather stomp on you than lift you up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:IMO the optics are bad for him to take off 16 weeks paid, but he’s entitled to it so might as well take it.

Also if more people start taking what they are entitled to, it normalizes it for everyone else.

I realize there are limits to this logic, but I still think it is important to consider.

100%

[Anonymous]

I manage a team. I think you should make sure you save time for when your kid is sick and/or the nanny needs time off or the daycare is closed for random days. But otherwise, it’s fine to take a vacation. Just put some distance between your leave and the vacation.

[Anonymous]

IMO as someone who has supervised a lot of teams I've always viewed your vacation leave as yours to use. It's extremely common for new parents to take all the parental leave they're entitled to plus vacation time and I would never hold that against an employee. The only thing I would avoid doing is taking vacation during known crunch times. I'd also give as much advance notice as possible and put in extra effort when you are at work to make sure things go smoothly when you're not.

[Anonymous]

My company offers unlimited PTO and it’s standard for new moms to take full leave (16 weeks) plus 3 weeks of vacation tacked onto the end - our “preparing for parenthood” materials even frame it as “19 weeks of paid leave” and everyone is encouraged to take it. You’re also definitely encouraged to take additional PTO during that year - most people take 5-6 throughout, so I took 3 weeks after I returned in June and no one batted an eye.

This question is hugely dependent on industry - I work in consulting, so our team / staffing are flexible - it’s not like I leave a hole in a team when on mat leave, staffing just puts someone else in my role. And when you comeback, you take PTO just like anyone else on the team