Which setting was best for your introverted kid

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Many introverted kids like mine prefer the large state scene. More places to go . More of a “something for everyone” mentality.

Totally disagree with the quoted text - and I am an introvert. Quoted text is how extroverts feel. Large numbers of people nearby increases stress for most introverts. Perhaps read the book Quiet?

DP. Sometimes a large, busier environment makes it easier to feel anonymous and blend in, which can feel comforting for an introvert. As long as they have a space to retreat to. Introverts aren’t all the same.

They retreat right out of the social scene entirely, because large groups like that are overwhelming…Glad you agree.

[Anonymous]

DP. I am an introvert and love “disappearing into a crowd”. The energy draining of being an introvert comes from having to speak to people.

But jumping on the dance floor when my favourite song plays and enjoying it “ alone” while a group of people around me are also enjoying them selves is electrifying. Also enjoyable is watching a parade alone on the street or shopping alone in a busy mall or seeing a good film at the cinema.

That’s not extrovertion it’s being happy in your own company but with a communal experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Kid number 1 has completely broken out of his shell since attending a large public. Working through multiple bureaucracies like a health clinic appointment, registering and tryouts for club sport, meeting with advisors in 3 departments (major and 2 minors), withdrawing from honors program and visiting multiple 500+ unit apartment buildings to determine preferred off campus housing. Dealing with bureaucracy is a part of life and he is getting a head start.

My kid did that at a midsize private,,, even Ubered to the ER from his dorm after he trusted his instincts when the health clinic kept misdiagnosing acute appendicitis. Rented zipcar and played on teams in a town over, club sport, etc. study abroad, foreign internships, etc.

It doesn’t need to be a big public to learn these skills….and it can start much earlier. My kids took the metro to high school from the suburbs. They would use metro in middle school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: DP. I am an introvert and love “disappearing into a crowd”. The energy draining of being an introvert comes from having to speak to people.

But jumping on the dance floor when my favourite song plays and enjoying it “ alone” while a group of people around me are also enjoying them selves is electrifying. Also enjoyable is watching a parade alone on the street or shopping alone in a busy mall or seeing a good film at the cinema.

That’s not extrovertion it’s being happy in your own company but with a communal experience.

I agree.

I liked the anonymity of a large public.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Many introverted kids like mine prefer the large state scene. More places to go . More of a “something for everyone” mentality.

Totally disagree with the quoted text - and I am an introvert. Quoted text is how extroverts feel. Large numbers of people nearby increases stress for most introverts. Perhaps read the book Quiet?

DP. Sometimes a large, busier environment makes it easier to feel anonymous and blend in, which can feel comforting for an introvert. As long as they have a space to retreat to. Introverts aren’t all the same.

They retreat right out of the social scene entirely, because large groups like that are overwhelming…Glad you agree.

Yep. People think I’m an extrovert. I can be outgoing, meet people early make conversation, everyone knows me…..

But I get completely drained. I just had houseguests that I love and by 48hours. Was dying to be alone in the quiet. I need to recharge.

I can only be “on” for so long.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Many introverted kids like mine prefer the large state scene. More places to go . More of a “something for everyone” mentality.

Totally disagree with the quoted text - and I am an introvert. Quoted text is how extroverts feel. Large numbers of people nearby increases stress for most introverts. Perhaps read the book Quiet?

DP. Sometimes a large, busier environment makes it easier to feel anonymous and blend in, which can feel comforting for an introvert. As long as they have a space to retreat to. Introverts aren’t all the same.

They retreat right out of the social scene entirely, because large groups like that are overwhelming…Glad you agree.

NP. Definitely don't agree. My kid introverted kid went to a large university and thrived. Joined clubs. Found a great group of friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Kid number 1 has completely broken out of his shell since attending a large public. Working through multiple bureaucracies like a health clinic appointment, registering and tryouts for club sport, meeting with advisors in 3 departments (major and 2 minors), withdrawing from honors program and visiting multiple 500+ unit apartment buildings to determine preferred off campus housing. Dealing with bureaucracy is a part of life and he is getting a head start.

My kid did that at a midsize private,,, even Ubered to the ER from his dorm after he trusted his instincts when the health clinic kept misdiagnosing acute appendicitis. Rented zipcar and played on teams in a town over, club sport, etc. study abroad, foreign internships, etc.

It doesn’t need to be a big public to learn these skills….and it can start much earlier. My kids took the metro to high school from the suburbs. They would use metro in middle school.

PP. Love this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Many introverted kids like mine prefer the large state scene. More places to go . More of a “something for everyone” mentality.

Totally disagree with the quoted text - and I am an introvert. Quoted text is how extroverts feel. Large numbers of people nearby increases stress for most introverts. Perhaps read the book Quiet?

DP. I’m an introvert and loved the book “Quiet”. However, I agree with the PP. I attended a large state school and loved that I could retreat to a quiet space when I needed to recharge yet still socialize when I was up for it. There are plenty of spaces on a larger campus where you can just disappear for a few hours when needed. But having the buoyancy of a great social scene was key to me breaking out of my shell now and then. Wouldn’t trade my experience for the world.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Many introverted kids like mine prefer the large state scene. More places to go . More of a “something for everyone” mentality.

Totally disagree with the quoted text - and I am an introvert. Quoted text is how extroverts feel. Large numbers of people nearby increases stress for most introverts. Perhaps read the book Quiet?

DP. Sometimes a large, busier environment makes it easier to feel anonymous and blend in, which can feel comforting for an introvert. As long as they have a space to retreat to. Introverts aren’t all the same.

+1
I just wrote something similar! A larger school is the best of all worlds.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Many introverted kids like mine prefer the large state scene. More places to go . More of a “something for everyone” mentality.

Totally disagree with the quoted text - and I am an introvert. Quoted text is how extroverts feel. Large numbers of people nearby increases stress for most introverts. Perhaps read the book Quiet?

DP. Sometimes a large, busier environment makes it easier to feel anonymous and blend in, which can feel comforting for an introvert. As long as they have a space to retreat to. Introverts aren’t all the same.

They retreat right out of the social scene entirely, because large groups like that are overwhelming…Glad you agree.

You have issues. This wasn’t my experience at all, or that of my introverted child. They have the opportunity to participate or not when there are more choices and opportunities available.
DP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: DP. I am an introvert and love “disappearing into a crowd”. The energy draining of being an introvert comes from having to speak to people.

But jumping on the dance floor when my favourite song plays and enjoying it “ alone” while a group of people around me are also enjoying them selves is electrifying. Also enjoyable is watching a parade alone on the street or shopping alone in a busy mall or seeing a good film at the cinema.

That’s not extrovertion it’s being happy in your own company but with a communal experience.

+1
Yes!

[Anonymous]

My introvert is looking at schools at both ends. UMD + Honors college + ASD support from SLP dept (extra cost).

Towson—mid size, close to home with honors colleges

UMBC—STEM back up

Case Western—smaller-mid size private with “nerdy culture”

Harvey Mudd—STEM LAC with access to other small schools

Also considering Amherst and Carlton.

Id like him to consider Rice but he says the best and humidity are too much for him.

[Anonymous]

Harvey Mudd is tiny, isn’t it? It’s smaller than most high schools.

[Anonymous]

Introvert thriving at an ivy, other introverts there as well. There are a lot of opportunities to get to know people in small groups or one on one. Quiet thoughtful leadership roles are abundant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Introvert thriving at an ivy, other introverts there as well. There are a lot of opportunities to get to know people in small groups or one on one. Quiet thoughtful leadership roles are abundant.

As they are at all schools.