Can’t tie a tie

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:YouTube university.

I don't get how this isn't the obvious answer. Youtube excels at this kind of thing. I used it to learn how to fishtail braid last week.

Because, you know, crazy high IQs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a DH with autism and I’ll be honest: I didn’t realize how many spatial relations and fine motor issues it can bring with it until many years of living with him. And it’s hard and frustrating, especially if you have a kid or a pet. I stopped at one baby because DH can’t multitask and just couldn’t successfully pull off a lot of the things it takes to keep a household going. Before I took things off his plate, he either did things so slowly they never got done, or he was too rushed and forceful and broke or ruined things. He’s broken lamps and tables and framed photos and stroller attachments and totaled two cars at low speeds while parking. He can’t tie his shoes easily and just slides them on and off until they sag off his feet and DC reties them.

Now he just freezes in place until I take over, or he never tries in the first place. I don’t share this with others because I know it reflects as badly on me as it does on him.

I went into mourning for a few years without realizing it. I mourned the adult relationship I thought we’d had, I mourned the equal partner I don’t have, and I mourned the loss of the dream I had of having a man who was as handy and capable as I am. I grew up in a family with very hands-on men and women who could do, make or fix anything, and DH’s shortcomings in this area have broken my heart.

In our society we no longer expect women to be able to cook. Yet we still expect men to be able to fix things. I am glad we are braking down typical gender roles but let's apply to everyone men included. Some men can't fix anything so what. Some women can't even make an omelette so what.

[Anonymous]

It's a men's garment--he is responsible for it. I don't get it. Should he be able to walk in heels?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a DH with autism and I’ll be honest: I didn’t realize how many spatial relations and fine motor issues it can bring with it until many years of living with him. And it’s hard and frustrating, especially if you have a kid or a pet. I stopped at one baby because DH can’t multitask and just couldn’t successfully pull off a lot of the things it takes to keep a household going. Before I took things off his plate, he either did things so slowly they never got done, or he was too rushed and forceful and broke or ruined things. He’s broken lamps and tables and framed photos and stroller attachments and totaled two cars at low speeds while parking. He can’t tie his shoes easily and just slides them on and off until they sag off his feet and DC reties them.

Now he just freezes in place until I take over, or he never tries in the first place. I don’t share this with others because I know it reflects as badly on me as it does on him.

I went into mourning for a few years without realizing it. I mourned the adult relationship I thought we’d had, I mourned the equal partner I don’t have, and I mourned the loss of the dream I had of having a man who was as handy and capable as I am. I grew up in a family with very hands-on men and women who could do, make or fix anything, and DH’s shortcomings in this area have broken my heart.

In our society we no longer expect women to be able to cook. Yet we still expect men to be able to fix things. I am glad we are braking down typical gender roles but let's apply to everyone men included. Some men can't fix anything so what. Some women can't even make an omelette so what.

She said he's totaled 2 cars while trying to park. I don't think that's the same as women not doing all the cooking, unless you know a woman who has burned down two kitchens while trying to make an omelette.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a DH with autism and I’ll be honest: I didn’t realize how many spatial relations and fine motor issues it can bring with it until many years of living with him. And it’s hard and frustrating, especially if you have a kid or a pet. I stopped at one baby because DH can’t multitask and just couldn’t successfully pull off a lot of the things it takes to keep a household going. Before I took things off his plate, he either did things so slowly they never got done, or he was too rushed and forceful and broke or ruined things. He’s broken lamps and tables and framed photos and stroller attachments and totaled two cars at low speeds while parking. He can’t tie his shoes easily and just slides them on and off until they sag off his feet and DC reties them.

Now he just freezes in place until I take over, or he never tries in the first place. I don’t share this with others because I know it reflects as badly on me as it does on him.

I went into mourning for a few years without realizing it. I mourned the adult relationship I thought we’d had, I mourned the equal partner I don’t have, and I mourned the loss of the dream I had of having a man who was as handy and capable as I am. I grew up in a family with very hands-on men and women who could do, make or fix anything, and DH’s shortcomings in this area have broken my heart.

In our society we no longer expect women to be able to cook. Yet we still expect men to be able to fix things. I am glad we are braking down typical gender roles but let's apply to everyone men included. Some men can't fix anything so what. Some women can't even make an omelette so what.

She said he's totaled 2 cars while trying to park. I don't think that's the same as women not doing all the cooking, unless you know a woman who has burned down two kitchens while trying to make an omelette.

Love this answer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a DH with autism and I’ll be honest: I didn’t realize how many spatial relations and fine motor issues it can bring with it until many years of living with him. And it’s hard and frustrating, especially if you have a kid or a pet. I stopped at one baby because DH can’t multitask and just couldn’t successfully pull off a lot of the things it takes to keep a household going. Before I took things off his plate, he either did things so slowly they never got done, or he was too rushed and forceful and broke or ruined things. He’s broken lamps and tables and framed photos and stroller attachments and totaled two cars at low speeds while parking. He can’t tie his shoes easily and just slides them on and off until they sag off his feet and DC reties them.

Now he just freezes in place until I take over, or he never tries in the first place. I don’t share this with others because I know it reflects as badly on me as it does on him.

I went into mourning for a few years without realizing it. I mourned the adult relationship I thought we’d had, I mourned the equal partner I don’t have, and I mourned the loss of the dream I had of having a man who was as handy and capable as I am. I grew up in a family with very hands-on men and women who could do, make or fix anything, and DH’s shortcomings in this area have broken my heart.

In our society we no longer expect women to be able to cook. Yet we still expect men to be able to fix things. I am glad we are braking down typical gender roles but let's apply to everyone men included. Some men can't fix anything so what. Some women can't even make an omelette so what.

This^. Women seems to be more tolerant of stupids, cheaters , deadbeats, alcoholics and abusers than men who doesn't have blue color skills.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a DH with autism and I’ll be honest: I didn’t realize how many spatial relations and fine motor issues it can bring with it until many years of living with him. And it’s hard and frustrating, especially if you have a kid or a pet. I stopped at one baby because DH can’t multitask and just couldn’t successfully pull off a lot of the things it takes to keep a household going. Before I took things off his plate, he either did things so slowly they never got done, or he was too rushed and forceful and broke or ruined things. He’s broken lamps and tables and framed photos and stroller attachments and totaled two cars at low speeds while parking. He can’t tie his shoes easily and just slides them on and off until they sag off his feet and DC reties them.

Now he just freezes in place until I take over, or he never tries in the first place. I don’t share this with others because I know it reflects as badly on me as it does on him.

I went into mourning for a few years without realizing it. I mourned the adult relationship I thought we’d had, I mourned the equal partner I don’t have, and I mourned the loss of the dream I had of having a man who was as handy and capable as I am. I grew up in a family with very hands-on men and women who could do, make or fix anything, and DH’s shortcomings in this area have broken my heart.

In our society we no longer expect women to be able to cook. Yet we still expect men to be able to fix things. I am glad we are braking down typical gender roles but let's apply to everyone men included. Some men can't fix anything so what. Some women can't even make an omelette so what.

This^. Women seems to be more tolerant of stupids, cheaters , deadbeats, alcoholics and abusers than men who doesn't have blue color skills.

This!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:YouTube university.

Yes. Look up whoseesthis and hand DH the phone so he can see an amazing tie knot that will be such a cool challenge that he’ll obsess over getting it done.